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Part 108: De Ondergang

March 06, 2018

  1. Intro

    Hello everyone! I’m political hack, casual discord user, and the last remaining Portugal flair-holder u/PonderousHajj, and I’ll be your narrator for this, the 108th part of the Civilization Battle Royale.Today’s featured art (“art”) comes to us courtesy of u/arcticwolffox, and boy oh boy is it relevant.

  2. Melon Map

    This week’s first map is by none other than our own Spherical Melon, showing us how the Brazilian python continues on its mission to swallow the Boer Rijk whole. We also get to see just how quickly both the Blackfoot and Mongolia have disintegrated as they come under pressure from the Inuit and Sibir, respectively. Hilo is now the world’s largest city, continuing the trend of one tile islands supporting hellish population densities with what are likely overfished and toxic oceans.

  3. Tile Accurate Map

    The next map is from the one and only /u/DerErlenkonig, showing us where each civ stands on the gameboard, so to speak. Brazil continues its breakneck expansion at the expense of the former hegemon, the Boers.

  4. PR Slide

    And to nobody’s surprise, Brazil comes in at number one. Lacsirax-- speaking with uncharacteristic certainty --believes the show’s over: the permanent carnival has come to town. While she may be right, stranger things have happened.

For example, Brazil became the global hyperpower.

  5. 1

    We begin today in the western theater of the Second Brazil-Boerg War, aka OCP III, where Pedro’s conquests continue with minimal resistance from Kruger. Anziku, Kabasa, Kakango, and the former Kongolese capital of M’banza-Kongo all fall, and while most appear to be firmly under Brazil’s thumb, a lone Boer biotrooper looks like it could potentially flip Kakongo back, albeit temporarily.Pietersburg also falls, and if annexed by Brazil could prove beneficial, as it is home to the ancient Brandenburg Gate.On the whole, Kruger still looks to be in trouble, here-- while the bulk of Pedro’s troops are taking time to catch up to the front lines, the Boer core is remarkably empty, and the Boer navy has absolutely no capacity to retake cities, possessing only ranged units and carriers.

  6. 2

    The eastern theater looks no different. Mundigak, Olyokminsk, and Lalibela have all turned green as a deluge of XCOM units flood into the African Great Lakes region. Neither Kruger’s freshwater navy nor his last remaining biotroopers and Boerg drones seem likely to stop it.

  7. 3

    For one reason or another Pedro decides to denounce Henry Parkes, with whom he shares a de facto maritime border.Meanwhile, remnants of the once-mighty Blackfoot army drift through the Pacific, evidently sharing open borders with Australia, but not Brazil. Cruelly enough, it was that civ’s half-assed commitment to the “joint war” with the Inuit which led to the utter destruction of the Blackfoot Confederacy.

  8. 4

    In Baja California, it’s only a matter of time before Ekeuhnick captures the Blackfoot holdout of Waipahu, even though Aussie peacekeepers block that city’s main point of entry on land.Worth noting is that, despite the denouncement of the previous slide, Parkes and Pedro still share open borders… and Parkes appears to be moving troops into North America.

  9. 5

    Ekeuhnick’s new territory is already fully carpeted with top-of-the-line units, and is probably the only army on the cylinder right now that can put up a real fight against Brazil. Their inevitable war looks like it’ll be a stagnant grind.In other news, after countless centuries of failed attempts, the international community has finally decided to pass Cultural Heritage Sites. The only objections appear to be from dead civs, and soon-to-be dead civs.

  10. 6

    Over in Greenland, Ingolfur’s land troops are heavily outnumbered by Brazilian peacekeepers and Free Blackfoot resistance fighters, while his navy is apparently still under the corrupting influence of Big Carrier. At least his cities, in spite of the terrain, seem to be well fed.Meanwhile, the international community decides to ban silk, because in this world of death and destruction, the only comfort soft sheets provide is to the enemy.

  11. 7

    We turn now to Siberia, where Sibir continues to hammer away at Mongolia’s dwindling and largely outdated military. Kuchum Khan captures Almarikh from Genghis Khan with a division of robot infantry and biotroopers, while Inuit peacekeepers glare intensely at their Brazilian counterparts.

  12. 8

    In the Sea of Zanj (I had to google that one), the once-mighty Boer navy has vanished. On land, Brazil’s army appears to have regrouped and prepares its thrust into the Boer core.It doesn’t look like Pedro brought his airforce to this part of Africa, but any advantage Kruger may have there means little unless he can muster up some ground forces ASAP.

  13. 9

    And just like that, Pietermaritzburg, Nylstroom, and Potchefstroom are captured. Pedro is cutting through city after city like it’s nothing. Boer cities-- with defense scores that push 200 points across the board --are falling like dominos. Brazil is so powerful that Potchefstroom was taken without there being a unit in sight around it.Offscreen, the Blackfoot’s last remaining North American city, Waipahu, falls to the Inuit.

  14. 10

    In Europe, Sweden denounces Iceland. Both civs possess respectable navies positioned at point-blank range, though neither possess any destroyers. Having said that, Sweden has a much larger land army, and-- by my count --34 air units to Iceland’s zero. What’s worse for Ingolfur is that Icelandic Britain is largely occupied by Brazilian peacekeepers.If Gustavus plays his cards right, he could cut a path through Ingolfur’s navy and establish a small beach head in Scotland, which Iceland would be effectively powerless to recapture.

  15. 11

    Nkuna falls to Brazil as Kruger orders a feeble counterattack with some of his last remaining drones. At sea, his navy retreats south while Buccaneer observers pause to study the situation on behalf of Big Carrier investors.

  16. 12

    In the west, Bethal and Benoni fall; worker drones from Madagascar begin evacuating, presumably headed to Antarctica by way of the Mozambique Channel.Brazilian territory now extends to within three tiles of Pretoria.

  17. 13

    Over on the Indian subcontinent we see just how efficiently Pedro is consolidating his empire, having annexed and built courthouses in Agra, Lahor, Balkh, Gaur, and Fatehpur Sikri. Furthermore, he’s clearly using these cities to pump out units, pushing his carpet up against his border with Vietnam, which is largely empty.At that, the ever-shrewd Trungs agree to sign both open borders and a Declaration of Friendship with Brazil. Whether it’s out of gratitude for taking down the Boerg, or simply fear, this move will likely buy Vietnam some time, and potentially a strong ally if either Sibir or Australia make a move on them. The Trungs just better build a carpet of their own, though, or Brazil will fill the vacuum.Really, though, who can blame them for wanting to be on Pedro’s good side? Because, after all...

  18. 14

    ...Pretoria has fallen.The carnival came to town and plunged a dagger into the heart of the Boerg. Alongside Pretoria, the cities of Mpinda and Standerton are also captured, while a Brazilian pincer moves to take both Ermelo and Vryburg.The collective is in disarray as it’s cut off from the capital. The sheer number of great and powerful wonders that comprise the Boerg Unicomplex at Pretoria make the city itself a wonder. Now in Pedro’s hands are the Mausoleum of Halicarnassus, the Great Firewall, the instrument of Digital Emancipation, the Aperture Science Enrichment Center, the Utsade Gene Vault, Ultima Tower, and of course, Skynet.With Pretoria, Brazil gains a 10% boost in combat strength and, depending on how well-developed Brazil’s cities are, potentially hundreds more gold, culture, beakers, and hammers per turn.

  19. 15

    On Madagascar, Heidelberg goes green. While it looks like Kruger can hold off Pedro’s embarked forces with his navy for a few more turns, his resistance likely won’t last much longer than that.

  20. 16

    Across the ocean, Henry Parkes of Australia has seized the earlier expulsion of Brazil’s omnipresent army and rebuilt his carpet-- and with cutting-edge units that aren’t Diggers!His Aussie diplomats finalize a Declaration of Friendship with Sweden, which could spell further trouble for Iceland down the line.

  21. 17

    Boerg resistance fighters briefly recapture Pretoria, before Brazil, which has not been deleted, moves back in, this time for good.Ermelo and the city of Wolfmaransstad on Comoros fall.

  22. 18

    Blackfoot diehards hoping that Ekeuhnick would be content after conquering North America, sorry: the Inuit have taken Honolulu. Crowfoot is down to two cities.Could fate be so cruel as to doom the Blackfoot to spend the rest of the CBR confined to the very same city they took when they finished off Hawaii? Could they really end up stuck in Kaneohe?

  23. 19

    Nobamba and Vryburg are taken by Brazil while a largely useless Boer navy looks on. A lone Australian Digger appears just to make me eat my words.

  24. 20

    Bahir Dar falls to Pedro while Kruger musters up a few Boerg drones from his new capital in Ulundi to defend Johannesburg and Boksburg, despite the impending XCOM wave from the north.

  25. 21

    Sibir continues to put pressure on Mongolia, taking Khoro and Hovd. The latter looks prime to flip a couple times, but Sibir clearly has the reserve strength to hold it in the long run. As such, it provides an excellent staging ground for a final assault on Karakorum.

  26. 22

    The new Blackfoot capital is the megacity of Miliani, on what I assume is the island of Kauai. It’s guarded by a flotilla of robots-- both giant and human-sized --and Atomic Era units like mobile SAMs, paratroopers, and Marines. Presumably, the carriers that aren’t being used for planes are being used as artificial islands for the city’s elite, and refugees from the mainland.

  27. 23

    The story is largely the same in the city of Kaneohe, although this city has more room to breathe, with more empty tiles around it. In the event of war with Australia, they could potentially pick off a few islands for themselves before Parkes got around to taking them back.

  28. 24

    Clearly two islands aren’t enough, though, as the Blackfoot sack Ahkaiyikokakinik in the Aleutian chain. The other Inuit cities in the area appear to have been heavily damaged, as well. With just a single advanced destroyer, though, the Blackfoot are unlikely to make any further gains here-- or even hold the city.Meanwhile, a Boer arsenal ship appears to be headed towards Brazil with a payload of some kind of missile, either conventional or nuclear, in an effort to get a potshot on Brazil before total defeat, or maybe to force an armistice.

  29. 25

    Kwa Dukuza falls to Brazil as XCOMs, biotroopers, and paratroopers continue to stream into what’s left of Boer Africa.Kruger still possesses an impressive navy, but unfortunately it’s not a very useful one for taking cities. Of the 50ish ships on screen, only one is a melee unit.

  30. 26

    As you may have noticed in the last slide, Crowfoot has made peace with Ekeuhnick, and has given up the former Hawaiian megalopolis of Kaneohe in the process.This island, completely surrounded by Australia, could be a flashpoint in a conflict between Parkes and the White Walkers in the future, as they now share an uncomfortable border.

  31. 27

    Ahkaiyikokakinik has also been relinquished, meaning the Blackfoot are left with a single, one tile island city in the middle of the Pacific, plus an army broken up into segments wandering around the farthest reaches of the cylinder.

Crowfoot’s gamble clearly did not pay off. Despite their large army, the Inuit were able to overwhelm them by virtue of the sheer size of their empire, their tech, and their massive industrial capacity. Still, with the troops he has left, the Blackfoot chief could theoretically take on Iceland, Sweden, the Boers, or even the Buccs if he tried.

  32. 28

    Whether it be through an error stemming from the mapping process of the mk. II, a glitch in the Boerg hivemind, or magic, Brazil’s capture of a city on the African continent has managed to result in… uh, this happening. Kruger’s Antarctic colonies (now arguably his core) are completely cut off from the rest of the cylinder by ice and the power of Brazilian culture.

  33. 29

    A quick glance at the Sahel shows that Pedro is not playing around. He has begun the process of annexing cities, moving over his air force, and repairing damaged Boer infrastructure with an army of workers.

We also see the new city of Jaboatão dos Guararapes. Unlike it’s real-world counterpart, renowned for its white sand beaches and wide ocean vistas, this version of the city is probably less tourist-friendly, as it’s in the middle of the Sahara Desert and surrounded by smoking ruins.

  34. 30

    Bulawayo, Boksburg, Vereeneging, and Ficksburg are all captured by Brazil, while the neutered Boer navy watches helplessly. The pace of this conquest really is quite stunning. Kruger, for his part, seems to have been able to drum up some additional soldiers in the form of a handful of biotroopers and robot infantry, but at this point it’s pretty clear that all of Africa is going to be Brazilian in just a couple more turns.

  35. 31

    Sibir takes New Sarai. While Mongolian defenses continue to crumble, it’s worth noting that Kuchum Khan’s forces are having trouble keeping up with the rate of his expansion. It’s entirely possible that Genghis can flip back Hovd and hold it for a couple turns, but like Kruger, his fate seems sealed.

Worth noting, however, are the large numbers of Inuit, Brazilian, and Australian troops in the area. What are they up to?

  36. 32

    What is probably the last remaining Finnish unit drifts lazily across the Indian Ocean, probably with Kekkonen drunk/asleep at the wheel.

The Trungs rub salt in the wound and denounce Kruger.

  37. 33

    Rustenburg falls as a sizable force of Brazilians embarks with its eyes set on Madagascar. I’m not sure if the pillaged tiles are the results of nukes, though-- their populations still seem too high.

Still, it’s clear that Pedro intends to take over the entire Boer Empire, including the islands of Reunion and Mauritius.

  38. 34

    WHOA, THERE.Ekeuhnick makes a surprise declaration of war on Henry Parkes, and immediately Honolulu is flipped. It’s convenient that “aloha” means both hello and goodbye, ‘cause the Inuit lost that city just as soon as they captured it.It’s hard to tell what Ekeuhnick is thinking, though-- while he could surely give Parkes a run for his money one-on-one, he’s staring down the threat of Brazil to the south. What’s more, the Ice Sheet Fleet seems to be more than a little absent in this part of the Pacific, and we all saw how many ships Australia has waiting in the wings. Regardless, things are heating up, and this war has the chance to be consequential to who comes out on top.Seriously, what did I do to deserve getting such an awesome part to narrate?!

  39. 35

    Kaneohe is already in the black and surrounded by Aussie forces (including a Digger). A Blackfoot Great General stays behind while the rest of his troops evacuate, mouthing to himself, “are you f@#%ing kidding me?!”

  40. 36

    Conveniently, Australian troops were already at the front lines of the Mexican theater when Ekeuhnick declared war. While this provides a small buffer for Brazilian Mesoamerica, Australia’s units here are likely doomed.

  41. 37

    Back in Africa, Pedro begins the final prong of Operation Shaka’s Revenge, capturing a Boer core city, Johannesburg, as well as the ancient Zulu city of Ulundi (home to the Future Worlds wonder of the Bionic Tower). Kruger is down to his last two cities on continental Africa, and his last six melee units.

  42. 38

    Kaneohe is predictably captured by Australia, and is unlikely to flip back. The once-massive population of the city has either been culled or fled, and it’s now just another dot on the map for Henry Parkes.

It’s almost cruel, though, that they took the city while the Blackfoot were still in range.

  43. 39

    Here we get a beautiful shot of Sibir’s core, and of the respectable carpet there. I won’t go beyond respectable, though, as about a third of Kuchum Khan’s territory is occupied by Brazilian peacekeepers. Still, it’s good to see the boys in grey capable of building a decent army.

Meanwhile, overwhelmed by the smell of death and decay in this world of war, the international community reverses its ban on perfume.

  44. 40

    They pass on making Catholicism the world religion, however.

In Europe, Pedro continues annexing cities and building more troops. Ekeuhnick’s Swedish-based expeditionary forces have the potential to do some damage here, given the older troops Brazil has decided to keep in this region, but with those numbers-- and without air support --they wouldn’t last long in a hypothetical match-up.

  45. 41

    Pedro takes the city that shares its name with the Boer leader: Krugersdorp. Ekeuhnick sends a small force to either help shore up the Boer’s defense against their common rival, or just observe, but it’s too little, too late: Madagascar is overflowing with Brazilian troops now. I spy three Boer advanced destroyers and a smattering of ground forces, but it’s hardly enough to hold back the green tide.

For whatever reason, Pedro isn’t done yet. This is getting absurd.

  46. 42

    Now, for the exact opposite of competent AI: Kuchum Khan makes peace with Genghis Khan, netting Sanchu, Rutog, and Dalandzadgad in the process, but missing the only city that really matters in the CBR: Karakorum.

Mapmakers hoping this war would reduce border gore will be disappointed: Sibir has cut Mongolia in two, and Korea controls a couple tiles outside Khonuu.

Brazil and the Inuit continue their staring contest in neutral territory.

  47. 43

    I… honestly never expected we’d see this day: the Boers have been kicked out of Africa, and by Brazil of all civs. The enormity of this cannot be overstated. Nodwengu and Umgungundlovu fall to Pedro, and Kruger has no ability to take them back.

This is really unbelievable.

  48. 44

    Nongoma and Kroonstad also fall, meaning Pedro now controls all of Madagascar. Ekeuhnick’s plan to help the Boers falls flat, leaving him with a single robot infantry desperately trying to escape the approaching Brazilian army.

Kruger has two melee units left to defend Ondini and the megacity of Middelburg. Unless Pedro gets a sudden change of heart, they’ll almost certainly fall, too.

  49. 45

    Back where the bottom truly started to fall out for Kruger we see Pedro consolidating his gains. Tile improvements are being repaired, a new carpet is being built, cities are being annexed and put to work, and the true consequences of this war are finally sinking in.

Worryingly of note for Iceland fans: Brazil has moved an awful lot of air units close to the border between the two civs, in addition to its carpet.

  50. 46

    The same can be said for the Middle East, now unified under one banner for the first time in history. Here, Brazil has settled São José dos Campos, continuing a trend of establishing provincial capitals in each new region that’s been conquered. Additionally, Batticaloa, Pasargadae, and Ghapan have all been annexed.

  51. 47

    In Anatolia and the Balkans, Contagem and Osasco have been established, while Constantinople-- already back up to a population of 29 --has been annexed.

For the time being, Sibir has a stronger army on its side of the border.

  52. 48

    I guess that about wraps up this pa-- oh.

Mongolia and Brazil join together and declare war on Korea. In any other scenario, this would be death by suicide for Genghis Khan. I mean, it may still be.

Brazil has a large presence here, but then again, so do the Inuit. In the absence of war with Ekeuhnick, Pedro should absolutely be able to provide the cover needed for Genghis to snipe a few cities from Korea. I can’t help but feel that in the end this may be a strategic miscalculation for Brazil, and a fatal one for Mongolia.

What’s clear that Pedro is an absolute madman.

  53. 49

    At the very least, it does not appear that the Inuit have open borders with either Korea or Mongolia. So long as the peace between the two remains, Pedro has the upper hand here, and even if war breaks out again, Ekeuhnick’s ability to do any damage in that scenario is hampered by his lack of ranged units in the area.

As for Sejong, he’d better have troops waiting in the east, because the city of Tabriz is already surrounded, and Pedro very likely has a carpet waiting in Vietnam to the south.

  54. 50

    In the land where the book on fighting wars good was written, Sejong seems to have only read the cliff notes. Pedro is pushing hard and fast into Korea, but it doesn’t look like it’s a very sustainable attack.

Sejong’s cities boast high defense scores and large numbers of air units while Ekeuhnick has his own army in Vietnam to take on Pedro’s reserves there if the need arises. If Brazil manages to take a city or two here, the Inuit could just as easily flip them if/when hostilities resume.

  55. 51

    Further south are still more Brazilian and Inuit troops. The fate of Korea may very well be decided by a proxy war hosted by a neighboring civ that is also somehow not party to said proxy war. These are… confusing times on the cylinder.

  56. 52

    In the north of Korea, again, the Inuit stand to gain the most. Sejong has virtually no army up here while Ekeuhnick has a formidable carpet just over the border. If Brazil captures any one of these cities and doesn’t carpet up quickly enough then the only ones likely to take control in the end are the Inuit.

It’s very possible that we could see the White Walkers dominate in Korean Manchuria without having to fire a single shot against any actual Koreans, if Brazil doesn’t just flat-out conquer them first.

  57. 53

    We close this chapter with a shot of the Brazilian Raj, which has been almost completely annexed by Pedro, and has gone on from building courthouses to new biotroopers in order to quench the bloodthirst of the accidental occidental emperor.

Brazil now controls almost all of Africa, Europe, South America, and India as well as the entirety of the Middle East. It possesses a gargantuan army and the industrial capacity to make sure that it only gets bigger.

Still, they’re far from invincible. The Inuit are not to be taken lightly, even with Australia fighting against them, and Pedro is at risk of throwing his troops into a meatgrinder in Korea. It’s easy to see why Pedro may feel like he’s unbeatable: in less than ten parts he singlehandedly swallowed whole the cylinder’s longtime juggernaut and cybernetic boogeymen, the Boerg, and began to creep his way up through Mexico and into North America. He risks massive warmonger penalties, however, if he finishes off Kruger, and his hubris may have led him to make the ultimate mistake by DOW’ing Korea-- never fight a land war in Asia.

Yet here, at the height of his power, does Pedro settle his newest city, and with the most arrogant-- yet appropriate --name, given the context: Uberlandia.