Home  ✧   Albums  ✧   Part 5: How to Fight Wars Good  ✧   59.jpg

Having given up entirely on the war against the Vietnamese, Mao’s general starts a war with the now much stronger Mongolians over a nearby (and clearly provocative) settlement - all while unprotected Chinese settlers roam around Mongolian borders.

Mao realizes that things have gotten so bad so quickly because of this dilettante that even the Koreans are now a threat. The Koreans.

Mao paces back and forth across Tiananmen Square desperately trying to remember where he found this guy, how this jerk rose out of nowhere into such a prominent and important position. He stops in his tracks, his eyes bulge wide. He says out loud to no one, “Oh, riiiiiiight. Shit. That Cultural Revolution is really gonna cost me, huh?”

Mao recalls his general, bans his book, and sends him away for re-education.