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Part 94: Some Assembly Required

Narrated by LordFowl

  1. Intro Slide

    Howdy ya’ll, Lordfowl here, and boy this episode will be one exciting ride! Here we have a class A meme from /u/AlbinosRideDinos t…

  2. Tile Map

    Here we have the tile accurate map, and one just must appreciate those beautiful European Borders, great job Iceland and Sweden ma…

  3. Melon Map

    Here we see the Melon Map which helpfully highlights the puppeted lands of our Favorite conquerors. Note that Sibir has almost no…

  4. PR Slide

    As long as the boers continue to not lose cities, they will continue to be number one. That .74 deviation surprises me, I would a…

  5. 1

    A shot of the land down under reveals that Vietnam really should be worried, at first glance an impressive display of force by the…

  6. 2

    A digger takes Hoi An and extends Australian contol down the coast of Vietnam, Korea has joined their brothers in a darker shade o…

  7. 3

    The Vietnamese bombing campaign could very well soon be backed up by a Kamikaze nuclear attack, but in the long run this attack wo…

  8. 4

    The war in Europe continues as well, with Neapolis falling to the Svea Rike. Both sides seem to be replenishing for another round…

  9. 5

    “Our enemies call it ‘the garbage patch’, well, one man’s trash is another man’s treasure!” - Winston Churchill, Navy representati…

  10. 6

    Here we see the devastating Battle of Borneo, the air war that has taken cities on both sides of the strait of Malacca deep into t…

  11. 7

    Hoi An and all of Korea fall back to the Twins, for now, but the Manchurian city of Tran Hoa is taken by the Australian imperialis…

  12. 8

    Kabul falls to Kruger, and the Boers now own the mountain passes into the seemingly abandoned Indian heartland. Agara holds the St…

  13. 9

    Here we see the nominally Finnish city of Hrazdan, shellshocked by first the collapse of their empire back home, and then the Boer…

  14. 10

    I take back everything I said about Kutchum Khan’s stupidity, and instead I will laud his high intelligence. After the blitzkrieg…

  15. 11

    A lone digger has recaptured the once great Hoi An bringing it down to a measly 5 population. Vietnam will lose the war quite badl…

  16. 12

    “Hello and welcome aboard the Swedish-Sibir front tour train! Buckle up, and we’ll get right into it! Coming up right ahead is the…

  17. 13

    “‘This central front seems devoid of Units!’ you might say, but take a second look at the massing of troops around Zibo, within a…

  18. 14

    “At the end of our little tour we can see the naval forces arrayed by both sides, likely leading to a pointless naval battle in th…

  19. 15

    Here we see the western front for the swedes, and although they are attempting an attack against Cume the swedes will not make any…

  20. 16

    The Captain looked out over his aircraft carrier, the tarmac crushed in in places by the constant Swedish bombardment, crews scram…

  21. 17

    Statistics show that Sibir is by no means a superpower, in fact, they seem to be a mid-tier nation, 10th in army size, 6th in both…

  22. 18

    Nevermind! Sweden is truly a paper Tiger! Behind Sibir in nearly every single category, especially the important ones like Army Si…

  23. 19

    Here we see Korea, a nation that has well and truly missed it’s chance. Perhaps if they had joined the Vietnamese Dogpile, Korea…

  24. 20

    While it might seem like this is the beginning of a successful Vietnamese counter attack, keep in mind that Persia full of Boer t…

  25. 21

    The hammer of Sibir falls, Yerashavant flips to the great Khan, and Swedes everywhere are heard weeping and gnashing their teeth.…

  26. 22

    Forgies Law: The amount of hype generated by a declaration of war is inversely proportional to the war’s actual importance. The Sw…

  27. 23

    To the north we see more of the same, some half-hearted fighting around the Benelux, but France and Germany are all but deserted,…

  28. 24

    Hawaii, perhaps feeling threatened by the Australian garbage patch floating past their Island are construction a Submarine. Nearin…

  29. 25

    Here we see the almost deserted South Vietnam Sea. If the Aussies went the way of Sibir to peace out now and surprise attack one o…

  30. 26

    A glimpse of the Inuit held Kamchatka reveals they too could stand to gain from a surprise attack against Korea. At this point war…

  31. 27

    The Boers have reclaimed the Mountain passes and the Vietnamese have magicked up a defense for Western India. I fear this front wi…

  32. 28

    Nedong will fall next turn, but so will Tashkent, and Ufa the turn after that. While other empires seem to be like candles, slowly…

  33. 29

    Battle hardened Sibir troops, veterans of the Vietnamese Front, now face the young, green, pudgy faced Swedish recruits who enlist…

  34. 30

    Former Norway lays defenseless, and Swedish high command knows it. They hope that the North Sea Nuclear Exchange keeps the Iceland…

  35. 31

    A shot of the north reveals the laughable state of the once #1 Yakutia. Hopefully someone decides to come along and put them out o…

  36. 32

    The Khan’s outdated Karpet looms over his next target, mockingly dubbed “Exclavia”, but I don't understand his logic. There is no…

  37. 33

    The war proceeds ahead of schedule, with Ufa falling a turn before I predicted. Leningrad is next, with the reclamation on the way…

  38. 34

    Kharkov is next on the Siberian chopping block, with Stalingrad not far behind. The north is even more bare than the south, and wi…

  39. 35

    Iceland retaliates tenfold for last parts North Sea Nuclear Exchange, turning all of Mitteleuropa into a radioactive hellhole. The…

  40. 36

    I am 76.362% sure that Lahti is a Siberian city, and I must therefore chastise it for building useless naval units that will neve…

  41. 37

    Here we see every research agreement in the world, and colour me surprised that these autocratic dictatorships are so willing to s…

  42. 38

    Nope! Nevermind! Australia and Vietnam unleash a thermonuclear holocaust on each other, likely killing millions of innocent Manchu…

  43. 39

    All for naught, not a single city changes hands.

  44. 40

    Vietnam flips Susa and Kabul back for a few minutes, resorting to their own nuking, and this front begins to look more and more li…

  45. 41

    The Swedes reclaim Ufa for a hot second, however it will fall back into Sibir hands shortly. Leningrad is already halfway to capit…

  46. 42

    Siberian Forces advance on Kharkov, and their AI bias towards Bio Infantry is illustrated for all to see. I counted 56 on this sl…

  47. 43

    Newton’s 3rd Law states an object in motion will stay in motion while an object at rest will remain at rest. Many were skeptical o…

  48. 44

    Here’s my question, why is Geelong in the red, while Medan remains untouched by the Vietnamese Bombing campaign? In other news, li…

  49. 45

    A shot of the Vietnamese core reveals what a curbstomp it would be if Mongolia surprize attacked Vietnam. Come on Ghengis, this is…

  50. 46

    Fallout obscures the Vietnamese Manchurian cities, and the nuclear winter really sets in. Those who are left alive are painfully t…

  51. 47

    The same is found on the other side of the Vietnamese Empire, with the mountain goat shepherds of the Mughal Kush bowing down to a…

  52. 48

    “We must only give it one good kick, and the whole rotten structure will come falling down” - Kutcham Khan (on the war with Sweden…

  53. 49

    Iceland takes Cologne, and a cheeky Bio-Infantry is gonna take Munich next turn. Iceland really missed it’s chance here with this…

  54. 50

    Here we see that the Blackfoot are more than ready to put up a fight if the Inuit start making trouble. Their outdated carpet ha…

  55. 51

    A look at the Kleptocratic Australian National Government Antarctic Reconnaissance Outpost Orange (K.A.N.G.A.R.O.O.) reveals that…

  56. 52

    Oh. That's why. The Australian government apparently has so much spare production on its hands that it can afford to have a massiv…

  57. 53

    A glance at Mongolia’s outdated carpet. Now if only it was in action against someone! Perhaps next part will be your chance to sh…

  58. 54

    The Koreans sail a Nuke by the north coast of Sibir. Is this a sign of a backstab to come, or is this bomb intended for a more dis…

  59. 55

    Were back to where we started on this front, with the Viets preparing to add another few million to the nuclear deathtoll. Will th…

  60. 56

    Kharkov falls to Sibir, Stalingrad and Leningrad are not far behind. Khutchum Khan really did make the right choice with this war,…

  61. 57

    Icelandic troops take Taega, proving even they can push against Sweden. Perhaps they could even reclaim Constantinople, and try an…

  62. 58

    Cologne, and the rest of the Benelux, falls back into Swedish hands, and the stalemate continues in Northern Europe. If Iceland co…

  63. 59

    Here we can see the Icelandic Fleet, unfortunately on the wrong side of the Irish Isles. Some hoped that the war would thin Icela…

  64. 60

    Sejong’s oceanic tarmac is one to make even Iceland jealous, and it is in dire need of a cleansing. Perhaps Australia or the Inuit…

  65. 61

    Info Addict begins and here we see why many rankers chose Australia for the #2 spot. Their military is leaps and bounds ahead of t…

  66. 62

    Australia is also #1 in land area, but the Boers are gaining with their Vietnamese Conquest.

  67. 63

    The Boers take the lead with 130 Cities, profiting over the collapse of Vietnam.

  68. 64

    Ah, here we see that Fascist regimes are always friends with everyone, although, there may be a bug, as it seems that Vietnam and…

  69. 65

    Lutheranism continues to dominate, likely becoming the new Judaism, controlling the old world, and the Blackfoot replicate their e…

  70. 66

    Here you can see the spread of these religions to fill the void caused by the removal of the Old Gods.

  71. 67

    The Boers take 3 out of the top 5 Cities in the world, a real achievement for a nation many believed would be fodder for Shaka’s I…

  72. 68

    Here is the Computer’s own power rankings, based on Gold and Resources. These match up pretty closely with our own community power…

  73. 69

    For example, the Trungs are ranked 4th, while we know that is gold left over from their glory days.

  74. 70

    Gustavus is well behind Ilfgor and he will continue to fall if Kutcham wishes it.

  75. 71

    Wow. It must be sad to be thought of a mid tier nation but still have less gold the Kekkonen’s Exclavia.

  76. 72

    At least Ghengis is above rumps like Hawaii and Armenia.

  77. 73

    The final slide reveals Sam’s gold reserves, stashed in the secret compartment of Battleship Texas. I have been /u/Lordfowl (and t…