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Part 87: The Hundred Days

Narrated by Lacsirax Ariscal

  1. Intro

    Hello from sunny England, and welcome back for part 87 of the Civ Battle Royale! It’s Lacsirax Ariscal here, power ranker, hasbeen…

  2. Map

    DerErlenkonig brings the beautiful Tile-Accurate Map, showing the true scale of Finland’s plummet from glory, Urho’s once expansiv…

  3. PR Slide

    If you missed the Power Rankings this week, you missed a big one, as the Boers fell from #1 for the first time in fourteen parts.…

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    Now here’s an unexpected sight! No, I haven’t scribbled all over this image, that complete mess of green is actually an account of…

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    While we’re at it, let’s examine some research agreements. Most of the fully advanced nations have understandably abstained from t…

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    Our first real shot of the show! Ingolfur’s Iceland are apparently already hankering to continue their conflict with Finland, with…

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    It’s clear that Sweden still haven’t run out of steam; the amount of troops in this shot alone are more than enough to rip through…

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    Here’s New Finland then: a small strip of formerly Soviet land separating Sweden from Sibir. I wouldn’t expect this buffer zone to…

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    Hardcore Finn fans should only be so sad. It’s very unlikely they’ll be spirited from the whole Cylinder, what with their multitud…

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    Is Britanny the commerce capital of the world? York has more customs houses than I’d know what to do with. From someone who lives…

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    Here’s the Boers’ Blemish, the last remaining vestiges of a once extensive Buccaneer colony, and the site of some of the most horr…

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    Meanwhile, drifting a few thousand miles from the more militarized areas of the Boer Ryk, a French galleass has been banished to a…

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    Ah, the Sibir-Vietnam War. At this point, it’s like an old friend. An old, dependable friend. An old, dependable friend who’s star…

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    Sibir also retain Nishapur; ordinarily I’d say Vietnam should take it back this turn, but the way this war has been going for them…

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    A useful open borders with erstwhile rival Finland has let Kuchum Khan funnel a decent contingency of BioTroopers into the area ar…

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    Our first shot this part of the Sibirian homelands shows that things are, unfortunately for Sibir, largely the same story as the p…

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    One of the few places left on the Cylinder where carpets remain the norm, the Inuit territories. The current #1s are fielding easi…

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    Vietnam’s carpet isn’t looking so bad, for what it’s worth – compared to adversary Sibir, the Trung Sisters have a veritable horde…

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    Apparently realising that a Finnish invasion is a lost cause, Ingolfur reshuffles his plans and looks to his tasty Swedish neighbo…

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    Pedro II shares his continent with just one other civilization now, the enduring Buccaneers. While Morgan no longer controls any c…

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    Another turn, another city for Gustavus’ northern lions. This time it’s Kharkov, and having reached the Sibirian border at last, t…

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    There are no border changes down the Ukraine way, though Leningrad is Sweden’s next target. Antioch, down in Crimea, is a much mor…

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    Vietnam again pushes on Carrolltown, though they’ll need more than one melee unit to take the Caspian stronghold. Another weakness…

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    But never mind mountains, as an equally impassable obstacle is suddenly materialising. Australia, whose continent has long been fu…

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    I left my contact lenses on a train last week (and, incidentally, my laptop), so you’ll forgive me for not being able to make head…

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    If Korea supporters weren’t embarrassed already, they should be now – Mongolia’s army has overflowed into Korea’s territory, and n…

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    A rare look at Jandamarra’s new home. Kimberley’s capital relocated to Wulungarra from Makassar in the hiatus. On the face of it,…

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    We’d doubted Sejong for too long, and Sejong reacted. Seeing the influx of Australian peacekeepers, Korea has set their sights on…

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    COULD SRI LANKA TAKE DOWN VIETNAM??? Er, probably not. Even less likely, Tibet, on whom Sri Lanka have just joined the coalition.…

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    Jyvaskyla falls, and with it, the Finnish dream. Now every single city they hold was originally founded by their enemies. But mayb…

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    No change again on the southern battlefields, though it’s increasingly clear Sweden are ignoring the Finnish airbase of Antioch, f…

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    Having brought Gyumri and Artashat back online, Vietnam currently look quite cosy in the Middle East. With such a mess of borders,…

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    A couple of little factbook slides for you now. First we see falling stars Korea, whose outstanding science far outstrips their cu…

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    Another, more justifiably “Terrible” leader, Parakramabahu leads a blisteringly mediocre Sri Lanka. It’s a little in-joke among th…

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    Parkes’ peacekeepers have spread even further afield, now clogging up the mountain passes to Nishapur. This one could actually wor…

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    Bamda, on the other hand, is now almost certainly a lost cause. Parkes is clearly making a very early play for the 2018 Nobel Peac…

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    DEFENDING AGAINST THE TERRIFYING BOER RYK. Oh yes, your eyes are not deceiving you. Kruger has declared war on the Trung Sisters,…

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    The raw stats are certainly in Kruger’s favour, ranking first in every category that counts except, crucially, army size – that ma…

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    Hell, you wanna know more about the Boers? How about the fact they have the greatest faith output, greatest tourism output AND the…

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    Vietnam are hardly shabby, with a military force at about 2/3 the size of the Boers, though defending a smaller area. They also ha…

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    They’re also not really prioritising tourism. Maybe, just maybe, that’s not such a bad thing.

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    Well, it wouldn’t be a major war without a quick look at the fronts. Vietnam has never commanded a navy in the Arabian Sea, but th…

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    That said, Vietnam hasn’t been completely slacking in Western Asia, and their Iranian army – presumably originally intended for Si…

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    Both armies have open borders with Finland, and one of the first great clashes of this war may well happen outside Hebron. It’s th…

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    That war is certainly the only one I want to watch now, but we mustn’t ignore the rest of the Cylinder. A once great power is stil…

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    Speaking of which, that war still hasn’t ended, and the Trung Sisters are presumably more than a little annoyed that their pointle…

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    Nishapur flipping has scattered the Australian troops further afield into the old Timurid lands. Vietnam are in a very precarious…

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    In East Asia, to a war I’d honestly forgotten had broken out this part, and it’s looking like Korea will take Turfan after all. It…

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    If official occupation doesn’t work out, you can always try Putin-style, right? Australia and Brazil have immediately signed open…

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    The recent declaration of war against Vietnam was apparently all it took for the northern Boers to raise arms, and while they hard…

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    Armenia, aware that their chances of a domination victory are, well, slim, are focussing on what really matters: art, literature a…

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    Brazil, in a valued moment of peace, turns their sights to the World’s Fair, eager to host it in their glorious capital of Rio de…

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    The densest city in the world, megapolis Kaneohe is still growing! And they’re also producing science like nobody’s business. Ther…

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    Iceland too are focussing on their science game, wisely building the National College in their capital. You can’t quite walk to Ir…

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    Eminent mathematician Pythagoras takes time out of trigonometry to count the world’s spare change. As seen earlier, Kruger and the…

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    A brutalised Finland don’t actually fall that much further behind than their usurpers Sweden. Elsewhere, this list is hardly a cru…

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    Babylonians, living in the utopian society that we do, have no need for nor even notion of material wealth – and apparently neithe…

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    The World’s Fair is held in the punishingly cold city of Ivvavik, presumably to the ire of the Boers, who stayed home in their bli…

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    Just a moment ago, the rankers were discussing where the nicest place to live in the Cylinder might be. Madagascar was suggested,…

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    Stalingrad has fallen, leaving only a useless contingent of Finnish cybersubs left patrolling the White Sea. The war here is well…

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    Down south the success story continues; Ufa has fallen out of nowhere, and Antioch looks very prone to following it. With Antioch…

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    Back to what we’ve all been waiting for, and we can see that Vietnam have indeed swooped in to defend Arabia, with Jericho standin…

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    First blood does go to the Boers as they seize Basra, which has all but been abandoned by the Trungs. But they do rally an impress…

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    They have to pull out of this war as fast as possible, though – even as, ironically, they are able to put the heat on Kuchum Khan,…

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    Indeed, Vietnam haven’t made a net loss of cities this turn, regaining Nishapur and holding it this time. Sibirian BioTroopers may…

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    Bamda continues to be surrounded by Australian troops but there is now a way through for an enterprising young tank, should the Tr…

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    As I hinted earlier, Turfan has fallen to Sejong. Korea has been disappointing since the hiatus, so it’s reassuring to see that th…

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    Western Europe, a land that has long been ravaged by constant conflict, has been relatively peaceful the past few decades, thanks…

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    Despite both of the iciest nations on the Cylinder fielding full naval carpets, it’s clear Ekeuhnick’s would tear the Icelandic ca…

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    On the antipodal side of the world, Kimberley engineers continue work on a modern armor, presumably one that can float. Who do you…

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    It’s been a fearsome part. Let’s remember everything that happened: Finland was systemically absorbed by Sweden (and sucker-punche…

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    We saw the treasury standings just a few slides ago, and things remain entirely the same. It’s interesting the Boers decided to in…

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    The Yaks continue to starve, while the Babylonians continue to transcend.

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    The Boers, with a religion now under their belt, are by far producing the most faith, with Brazil the only superpower not making i…

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    Would you believe it? Yakutia actually beat Hawaii at something as they scrape behind a pitifully low Sri Lanka. Tibet remain top…

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    Wow, a juicy military graph for me to squint at and hardly be able to discern! Even I can see the obvious things on here though –…

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    We come finally to religion, of which we apparently will only ever have five. While none of the religions have spread outside thei…

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    Finally the religion map, which shows us nothing we didn’t already know. And that’s all from me. Thanks for reading, thanks for co…