Part 35: Kick‘em Whilst They‘re Down!

1

Salutations, and welcome to another sterling episode of the Civilization Battle Royale! This week you‘ve got me again, Lacsirax Ariscal, streamer, cartographer and token woman. Last time I narrated the CBR, three civs were bloodily eliminated. Let‘s see if the same thing happens again - like last time, I will be narrating blind, without having read through the slides first. If you‘re reading this on /r/civ and you somehow DON‘T know about /r/civbattleroyale by now, come join us! It‘s far more than a discussion board, it‘s a thriving community full of OC, contests, side-games and general friendliness.

2

First up is our map with friendly additions like City names and the like by well... yours truly! Credit to /u/SylonL for an amazing base to work with.

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Next up we have a map with regards to what Civilizations make up our endangered list, and what Civs are the proverbial top dogs. /u/AlbinosRideDinos gets the credit for this one!

4

Now for something we haven‘t really featured before, but really have ought to - lordberric‘s Info Table run by /u/lordberric and /u/bluesox! This table has a vast wealth of knowledge from Unique Abilities, Military Technologies, Faith and Religion and my favourite slide the Bloodthirstyness tally! You can find all the information in the link below. Oh, and special thanks to /u/patkellyrh who excrutiatingly extracts all the InfoAddict data from the game database files when summoned! https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1Ay05q6DAQyccuO_ZB7_3IO6C2NvDwnpnwfQMG4T04gA/edit#gid=262017952

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Finally, here‘s whose on top of the Power Rankings for now - The Boers. Read the Power Rankings of all 47 remaining Civilizations! http://imgur.com/a/XfOlk/layout/horizontal

6

After all these frivolities today, we dive right into the action. And unusually for this part of the world, it is indeed action, as Yakutia finally conquer Hiroshima! But the good fortune for the Snoryaks will be but fleeting - with three riflemen stationed outside the city and Yakutian reinforcements looking... non-existent, it won‘t be long until Hiroshima is flying the flag of the rising sun again.

7

Now we head to Europe, where the Buccaneers are making short work of Portugal‘s defenses. Lisbon has started to take damage and Maria‘s last remaining fleet is stationed in the Mediterranean, far from the action. If the Buccaneers do capture Lisbon - and bar a sudden peace treaty, it‘s looking incredibly likely - it will be the first cross-continental capital capture. That‘s big news. Also note Snorway‘s rather impressive fleet watching the action. Err, isn‘t there something else you should be doing right now?

08

The Inuit White Walkers claim their first casualty, and it‘s Sichangu, the ex-Sioux city Canada just seized from the Blackfoot. Oohenupa will surely be the next to go. But unless the Inuit have open borders with the Blackfoot - and there‘s currently no evidence to suggest they do - it might be tricky for them to make any more progress. Maybe giving away Itazipcho wasn‘t as silly an idea as it seemed.

09

BAD NEWS FOR TIBET, AS SIBIR READY THE WAR MACHINE AND... um... where‘s the Sibirian war machine? Anyone? Guys? It looks like Kuchum Khan is somewhat overstretching himself, as on this front there looks to be around ten workers for every military unit. If Tibet weren‘t being ravaged by Vietnam, I‘d fancy their chances at taking Tyumen. And if Genghis were to come to their aid... my, that would shake things up.

10

Mexico and Texas declare war, but sadly not on each other. Instead, they tag-team Lincoln‘s dwindling Union. With Mexico miles away and Texas preoccupied by pirates, I don‘t think this will trouble Honest Abe too much. Instead, I‘d be more worried about the solid line of Canadian artillery nearing Boston, and I‘d be focussing on taking back Washington and reenforcing it with all those artillery just hanging about around Cincinnati. The future isn‘t exactly rosy for the States, but they don‘t appear to be on their death bed quite yet.

11

Oh boy. Here we go again. Teaming up with Finland (Kekkonen seems to be all about the tagteaming today, being Kuchum‘s buddy against Tibet too), Carthage declare war on the Ayyubids for the umpteenth time. Their last war - the Bilbais flipper - lasted centuries, but with Saladin‘s defence corps not even sporting MUSKETS, Hannibal‘s rifles and cannons should tear through Egypt a little quicker this time. On the outskirts, Sparta‘s Floating Phalanx looks on, threateningly. It would also be the perfect time for Israel to strike - the Ayyubids are about the only nation they look more impressive than, and they could find themselves with a nifty canal city if they play their cards right. But this is Israel we‘re talking about - there‘s a reason they only have four cities.

12

As predicted, Hiroshima is easily recaptured by Japan. And judging by the state of Yakutia‘s forces, I think it will be a long time before we set eyes on this area again.

13

At the end of last part, Sibir was in control of Kharkov, and it doesn‘t look like that‘s going to change any time soon. Far from being the ever-flipping pendulum that is Morelia (current status: Sibirian grey), Kharkov is firmly defended, and it appears the unlucky duo of Stalin- and Lenin-grad will be next to fall. But as seen in the last shot of Sibir, the Sibirian train of hurt is running out of steam. There‘s nothing behind the front lines - after this attack, it might be time to call it a day and rebuild. At least Finland don‘t appear to be much of a threat - where has their army gone, exactly?

14

Sichangu turns red again. Canada controls Hudson Bay, so any land attack from the Inuit can be countered by a naval retaliation. I was excited for this war, but now it seems like it could turn into a never-ending flip war for two rather useless snow cities. The only way I can see the situation changing is for the Ice Sheet Fleet to suddenly materialise, or for the Blackfoot to pick a side - it will be a while before their peace treaty with Canada ends, so is it time to fight ice with fire? Until then, I don‘t have high hopes for anything but a stalemate to occur.

15

Morocco fought for Braga (well, they took it undefended from a mystified Kongo), and they‘re not letting it go that easily. With Portugal‘s navy destroyed by the Buccaneers, Ahmad of Morocco rather easily sails right back into his Hispanic harbour. I‘m sure that Portugal‘s land army will have something to say about that, but it‘s a symbolic gesture if nothing else. Don‘t count Morocco out yet - they have an embarked army on the way to Iberia, and Lisbon is already looking very weak... Also, Babylon‘s submarines appears to have been officially renamed the S.S. Observer. Huh.

16

I have no idea what Canada did to garner that many votes, but Ottawa will host the next World Congress. Take note, /r/CBRModelWorldCongress. Their core isn‘t looking too shabby - there‘s a lot of spare artillery hanging around - but if I were them I‘d peace out of the American war while they were ahead, and focus on rebuilding for the possible Inuit threat.

17

One of the bets being contested on the CBR Gambling thread is about the potential fate of Waipahu. Its fate seems no clearer here than it did at the outset of the war; it‘s been somewhat damaged by Mexican forces, but Hawaii has brought the bulk of their navy to play. If they best the Mexican navy, they could even push for Merida. It‘s all to play for in Bajaloha.

18

England denounces the Boers. Yeah, let‘s see how that goes for you. Speaking of the Boers, it‘s interesting to note that the majority of their army is concentrated in the west - either they really trust Ethiopia or they‘re planning something. Mali, be frightened - Kruger‘s sporting landships now. Meanwhile, Carthage have started to engage the Ayyyyyubids. North African wars have, in this universe, always been a slog, so I don‘t expect to see much progress for some time.

19

Poor Mao. He‘s clung on for so long, and I predicted Genghis would make peace after taking Tabriz. But it looks like it is not meant to be - for once, there are muskets and pikes stationed outside Shanghai. You can‘t defend with luck and lunacy forever. This might be the last shot of a living Mao.

20

Do my eyes deceive me? A city... in the Amazon basin... flipping?? It appears Argentina managed to capture Machu while we weren‘t looking, with the Incas now having taken it back. This is truly a momentous occasion. Whatsmore, but for a total lack of melee units, you could see Argentina recapturing the city, too. Sadly, Brazil are being their usual conservative selves, and staying home in Fortaleza. But still, we may be seeing more of South America than ever before. I‘m excited.

21

Israel constructs its first UI, despite it being unlocked at Economics... oh, don‘t tell me you only just got economics, David? Anyway, the kibbutz can only be built on farms and gives a healthy bonus to its food output, as well as faith and culture. Shame that appears to be Israel‘s only farm, really. Israel keeps on sleeping, despite a relatively unprotected Bethlehem and Dvin to the southwest. Come on David! Shock us for once!

22

The Sri Lanka-Afghanistan war is finally heating up again and... hm... this seems familiar. Last time this happened Mazar-i-Sharif flipped like crazy before settling in the original owner Afghanistan‘s hands. This time Sri Lanka‘s fleet looks more menacing, no longer consisting of triremes upon triremes. However, Mirwais (Afghanistan) controls a veritable air force, which if deployed well could make short work of the Sri Lankan offensive. The outcome currently seems unclear.

23

It‘s been a long time since Kyoto‘s last flip, but that looks to soon be rectified as Korea‘s only visible turtle ship is stationed right ouside the weakened city. How much longer can Australia trust on their rather small Japanese defence force to hold the city, I wonder? With Korea now fielding non-Great War Infantry, a land invasion would likely be very effective. But it‘s a long shot - everyone knows just how expansive Korea has been in this match. Which is to say, not in the slightest.

24

Canada heeds my advice and makes peace with America, scoring Boston in the peace deal! This keeps America safe from Texas, and grants Canada a useful springboard for when the time comes to invade the fragile nation. America are crippled, of course, but realistically they have been since the first few parts. At least they still have Albany, one of the largest cities in the world, and at least they‘re the only nation in the Americas to boast a carpet!

25

As Waipahu takes damage from the Mexican fleet stationed in the Gulf of California, Hawaii bests Mexico in the Pacific Ocean to the west. This is still a pretty even playing field, and it could still go either way; Waipahu will probably fall to Mexico, but Hawaii might well be able to seize it straight back. And with Merida on a prominent peninsula, it‘s very vulnerable to naval attacks. Looks like Benito (Mexico) might have bitten off more than he could chew. Or downed more tequila than he could stomach. He‘s also apparently discovered that there‘s a religion out there with more adherents than his own, and declared war on the blasphemous heathen founders.

26

Well, Carthage may have the tech. And the numbers. But Hannibal‘s famous ‘human-like‘ AI seems to be failing him, as no Ayyubid cities have taken a lick of damage yet. Maybe it‘s the lack of elephants...

27

Speaking of cities that inexplicably undamaged... Kufah and Khurasan remain firmly healthy despite there being zero defenses outside Kufah. Navally Ethiopia have fallen far behind in tech, so capturing Kufah seems to be the only option for Haile Selassie. But I wouldn‘t be surprised if Arabia managed to fend off the army with their frigates. But currently we see no movement from either side.

28

Sadly it doesn‘t look like Morocco are going to be able to pull off another legendary capital snipe, as the Buccaneers are on the verge of taking Lisbon, although a crossbowman and a rifleman might be enough for Portugal to reclaim their capital temporarily. Meanwhile Morocco cling on to Braga, although the city isn‘t looking too healthy. Norway still look on. Hey, we haven‘t seen anything of that war this part. I wonder how they‘re doing?

29

Here we can see three very different armies; the Incas have just entered the Industrial Era, still pitifully boasting muskets and crossbows. Argentina are a step up, with rifles and gatling guns, but it is Brazil‘s Great War Infantry that stand out. It‘s a shame neither Eva‘s rifles or Pedro‘s GWI can find a way into Machu though, as the city stays in Pachacuti‘s outdated hands.

30

Apparently it‘s a cross-faith crusade that‘s occurring, as Burma, the home of Buddhism, also declares war on Israel. The Jews can‘t catch a break. Ayyubids next, perhaps? In terms of Southeast Asia, Vietnam are still scary and everyone else still isn‘t. Champa‘s capital would be stomped by the Trung Sisters, and as soon as they get artillery they could make short work of Burma too. Still, that‘s rather becoming a recurring theme. When they get artillery. It‘s a serious hole in their otherwise advanced tech. If Vietnam want to stay contenders, they need to get a hold of those bad boys sooner rather than later.

31

Hawaii make peace with Israel as Iceland declares war on them... why is it only ever irrelevant neighbours with Israel? Meanwhile, Shanghai‘s days are numbered. There‘s a pikeman that could feasibly retake the city when the inevitable comes, but the inevitable will stay inevitable. I think it‘s time to prime those F keys...

32

Whoever did the write-up for Armenia in the Power Rankings (Nevikcrn, I think) worried that Sibir would take Yerventashat straight from the Soviets and give Armenia a very threatening new neighbour. They were right, and it doesn‘t look like Stalin is ever going to see Yervantashat in Communist Red colours again. Leningrad is about to fall and Ufa is next on the list. As I said before, Kuchum Khan (Sibir) doesn‘t have enough troops to finish off the USSR once and for all, but Stalin‘s Russia has been permanently crippled by this war. Like America, they‘ll probably leave the war with the consolation prize of having one of the world‘s largest cities - Moscow.

33

YAR HAR FIDDLE DEE DEE. Lisbon is the first capital city on Eurasia to fall to an American. It won‘t stay that way for long, however; I‘d be shocked if Portugal didn‘t recapture both Lisbon and Braga on their next turn. But if the Buccaneers don‘t do anything stupid they should be able to keep Lisbon at the end of the war. This is a big day for the pirates, and an even bigger day for the other European nations...

34

Lest we forget, there‘s another war involving Portugal going on... actually, we may as well forget it, as Sparta sure have. They took all their units to Rome only to absent-mindedly leave them there, facing the Portuguese bombardment with not so much as a blink. Even if they were to attack the city, I don‘t really know how much damage a squadron of knights could do. It‘s worth pointing out that by European standards, Sparta‘s technology has fallen woefully behind. Another war with Sweden and they‘d be toast.

35

The tide of the war is turning, and it looks like Waipahu will come out unscathed. With Mexico‘s navy evaporating, Hawaii are free to do as they please, surrounding the almost indefensible Merida as expected. Juarez (Mexico) does have artillery, so there‘s a chance he could turn this war around somehow. But it‘s looking less and less likely as the peacekeepers of the Americas show Mexico what happens when you assume their blissed-out nature makes them an easy target...

36

The US enters the Modern Era, which, for context, puts him a whole era ahead of the Incas. It‘s not particularly advanced for North America, though with a similar level of military tech to Canada it‘s not to be sniffed at. In fact, if Canada were to be preoccupied with another war - say, a heated up Inuit or a Blackfoot relapse - Lincoln might manage to retake Boston and Washington. In the corner, Stalin throws a denouncement Lincoln‘s way, which in another world would likely be bigger news. Here, it‘s just another message of hate in a world of constant war.

37

We‘re getting closer to a relevant Israel war... Hannibal of Carthage clearly reckons he can tear through the Ayyubids and clear out Israel easily, but the battlefields beg to differ, as Carthage‘s rifles are still inexplicably yet to get a shot through to Cairo or Aswan. Surely it‘s only a matter of time?

38

There we go! Israel find themselves at war with Armenia as the first war in the Middle East for centuries breaks out. It‘s fair to say the technology of both combatants is pretty lackluster, although Armenia does boast cannons. Still, this won‘t be a blitzkrieg. It‘s just nice to see Israel get some relevant airtime to be honest. Perhaps Persia could join in for added excitement.

39

Both ‘Grads‘ fall, with Stalingrad looking unrecapturable and Leningrad looking unholdable (neither of those are words, are they?) Stalin and Kuchum‘s armies are both running out, though - as I‘ve said before, I don‘t think Sibir will be able to make much more progress than they already have done.

40

Finally! A shot of Scandinavia, and things are as bloody as I expected, with Oslo on the verge of falling to Sweden‘s unique units. Snorway‘s home army is still moderately strong, and it will take time for Sweden to clear them out; the rough terrain will certainly work in favour of the defenders, too. But if Sweden can navigate their navy through the Kattegat and into the North Sea, Trondheim and Tonsberg are doomed.

41

It‘s a major plot twist in Bajaloha as the Hawaiian navy sent to bother Merida is completely rebuffed while a Mexican caravel appears from nowhere right outside Waipahu! Suddenly Mexico seem very much to be on the front foot again. And after they‘re done with Waipahu, I spot a vast, populous and undefended land to the east ripe for the taking...

42

We all know the plots don‘t mean anything. We all know Agent Em makes for way better OC than intel. And yet, you still have to be a little bit excited by the thought of Finland marching through Russia, eliminating the Soviet Union once and for all. I guess we‘ll have to wait and see.

43

Well, there‘s worse things to be wrong about; Yakutia does manage to recapture Hiroshima fairly quickly. Again, it will fall right back, but with Tygyn Darkhan (Yakutia) now sporting battleships, we might be seeing that city flipping more often here on in...

44

As Burma settle some inactive conflicts (no city giveaways this time), Brazil and Argentina still bear down on Machu with a lot of gatling guns and not very many melee units. How long has that Great Engineer been in Machu? I swear it was there in the last Colono War, too. Anyway, the war drags on. And on. And on...

45

Gran Colombiarrr is basically undefended, although fat chance Brazil or the Incas are about to declare war - their coastal cities would be gone in minutes judging by that Buccaneer navy. Clearly the main focus of this screenshot, though, is the beautiful sight of a cargo ship utilising the Nassau Canal. It‘s nice to see some AI competence, isn‘t it?

46

With Sri Lanka‘s navy looking unweakened, it seems very likely that Mazar-i-Sharif is on the verge of falling. A severe lack of - you guessed it - melee units in Afghanistan might see the city stay Sri Lankan for some time. The big question, then, is can they push any further? Well, most of the invading force is naval, so bar Susa it will be difficult to march on any other Afghani cities. But still - it‘s a handy base to build on, and when Sri Lanka finally hits planes, both that and Negombo could prove very useful indeed. The time when Afghanistan looked like they could hit great heights is long gone, sadly.

47

As half the world is engulfed in a mysterious grey mist, Oslo falls to Sweden! They also appear to be getting their powerful fleet through the straits around Denmark, so it could be curtains for Snorway soon. But there‘ll be a bloody battle for Oslo before any of that happpens - there‘s no way those riflemen won‘t retake the city. TPangs note: I got excited and took the picture quickly, but sure- grey mist is now canon I guess?

48

Bahahahaha! I was right about Tibet! A combined airforce of 12 planes will probably keep the Tyumen offensive in check, but it speaks worlds that Tibet - a nation which has just been ripped in half by Vietnam - is able to besiege one of Sibir‘s main cities. The interior of Sibiria is absolutely empty. It looks less like a #2 nation and more like a great opportunity for one of their neighbours. Even if that neighbour is Tibet. On the other hand... Urgench looks like a goner. Oh well. One for one?

49

Oslo is, naturally, immediately recaptured. Norway also declare war on the Union - maybe that taskforce navy near Portugal could casually snipe a city? That would be something to see.

50

The currently unannexed East Boer Provinces hit the Industrial Era. I‘m not kidding; as soon as Kruger wants these cities they‘re his. In the meantime, Mansa Musa of Mali could maybe amuse himself with a holiday in Morocco. Kumasi is looking juicy, and over near Tomboctou - where Mansa Musa somehow managed to find a cannon - the Moroccan core looks absolutely undefended. But I‘ll be surprised if Mali ever declare war again. While it‘s in shot, I want to talk about Mampong. You know, the city that Morocco gave away to Ethiopia a couple of episodes ago. Many here laughed. Morocco worked so hard for that city, and now they give it to a distant nation in a peace treaty? Preposterous, I heard you cry. And you‘re wrong - it was genius. As long as Ahmad had that city, he risked the very real threat of a war with the Boers, who since conquering Kongo now bordered the colony. A war with the Boers would surely lose him the Ashanti capital of Kumasi too, and maybe even his incredibly populous settlement of Sale on Cabo Verde. Give it to Ethiopia and the risk was eliminated - they lose the malus for having close borders and, in general, Kruger‘s terrifying army would be more likely to look to a closer neighbour. Overall I think it was a fantastic move. But that‘s just my thoughts. Back to regular proceedings!

51

Finland! How could you?! No matter, I think Mao has more things on his plate than a possible Finnish offensive. Finland still sport the best tech in the region, although their army could be bigger. Still, if they did make good on their threats to invade Stalin... they‘d have a lot of free workers, for a start. Beyond that they‘d have some high pop cities - maybe even a capital - and they‘d have united their Byzantine colonies with their homeland. It just takes one little DoW, Kekkonen...

52

Well, it was fun while it lasted, but the tables have turned in Tibet, with Bamda now lightly threatened by Sibir, thanks in no small part to their airforce. I‘m not yet convinced they‘ll take Bamda, though, and you‘d imagine by now Sibir would have five more cities under their belt. You know what to do, Genghis...

53

The Waipahu War rages on, still as unpredictable as before. The caravel that was poised to seize the city is gone, but a regiment of Rurales (Mexico‘s riflemen replacement) looms instead, eyeing up the battered city. Another Hawaiian fleet encircles Merida. It‘s close. Very close.

54

In the war between pirates and cowboys, it looks like pirates are winning - but only because Texas have recruited a load onto their side. Texas have held off the Buccaneers effortlessly, and if there‘s one city you‘d tip to start taking damage, it would be Puerto Cabello. Looks like the Buccs can only manage one war at a time; admittedly, the conquest of Portugal is going fantastic, but they‘ll have to try harder if they want to crack the Texan shell.

55

Oohenupa, the city I said would fall about 50 slides ago... falls. The Inuit are also fielding regular old infantry, the first I‘ve seen outside Korea. It won‘t help them make headway into the Canadian mainland, which is still defended by a crack team of frigates and artillery. Iceland has sent some token privateers to be taken out by Inuit submarines, in the top right corner. And Arabia makes peace with the Champa, who were surely on their way over to wreak havoc right that moment!

56

Hiroshima stays Yakutian as the mysterious ‘T d Takatora‘ (he‘s probably just embarassed to admit he‘s called Todd) fails to stop Kanazawa being damaged by Snoryak bombers. Still, the Yaks are going to need a closer navy if they want any chance of taking out Japan‘s current capital. Until then, Sernie Banders‘ successor Todd Takatora is pretty safe in his position.

57

Kyoto falls! To a... er... gatling gun? Whatever, Korea waited far too long to retake Kyoto and now Australia‘s defence corps have come out in droves. There‘s only so much submarines can do. Which, in this case, is almost nothing.

58

Sri Lanka, are you kidding me? You couldn‘t have waited, like, one more turn to make peace? Mazar-i-Sharif was yours! On screen, we can see the Mughal Empire, plotted against by Kekkonen‘s Finland, rather futilely. I still think the Stalin idea was your best one so far, Urho. Mazar-i-Sharif is sure to flip soon, and Susa has started taking damage too, for what it‘s worth. This would also be a great opportunity for the Mughals to strike, with Balkh looking fairly obtainable. Hidden in the sidebar among irrelevant peace treaties, it transpires that Morocco and Portugal have made peace - with Morocco retaining Braga. Sigh. I‘d just removed the label saying ‘Maria‘s Folly‘, too.

59

Over in Europe, Sparta have finally started damaging Rome, years after the siege first commenced. A musketman should make the job easier, though I‘m still very concerned they haven‘t even got the tech for lancers, never mind riflemen. Norway‘s units are still busily being anywhere that isn‘t Norway, and France are also in this screenshot, and haven‘t been mentioned yet, so yeah. France.

60

Waipahu has fallen! And it‘s safe to say Hawaii looks absolutely broken. Mexico has valiantly defended their homeland while claiming the forward settle that was so rightfully theirs. Their gatling gun spam also looks more like artillery now, and I spy some Rurales among them. Compare that to Texas. I don‘t wanna get too excited, but I think the age of Mexico could be around the corner.

61

Sichangu and Oohenupa flip. Canada‘s open borders with the Blackfoot (and the Inuit‘s lack thereof) is really helping them in this war, although the Inuit tech level is not to be sniffed at. If the Inuit can get their destroyers into the Hudson Bay, they could wreak some real havoc, but at the moment Canada holds strong. Who would have thought giving away Itazipcho would be Canada‘s saving grace, though?

62

The war isn‘t over yet! Hawaii‘s second wave comes, and resecures Waipahu. But with well placed artillery on the Mexican shore, and a Rurales regiment ready and waiting, I think Hawaii‘s successes will be short-lived.

63

If you‘d been eagle-eyed last time we saw Tibet (or you‘re just keeping constant note of the minimap), you‘d have noticed Urgench had fallen. And now two more cities are feeling the heat, with Bamda and Nyingchi‘s current health reminding us that, in this era, who has planes makes all the difference. Sibir look to have a somewhat more focussed force around Tyumen now, although they still look some way off Bamda. Vietnam, meanwhile, are waiting outside Chamdo for... well, something I guess.

64

The thing about Sibir is every shot they seem to be running out of steam and every time they take it just a little bit further. The so-called ‘pendulum‘ of Morelia is now safely Sibirian, and Ufa is their latest conquest, having held on to both Stalingrad and Leningrad. Tashkent, heavily weakened, would complete their southern conquests and permanently secure Morelia and Yervantashat, but it looks like Kuchum Khan is focussing on a far tastier prize, as the bulk of his artillery knuckle down on Moscow. Why did I never doubt you?

65

As Canada enter the modern era - behind the US! - and flip Sichangu, Mexico retake Waipahu. That city was on 24 population before! I don‘t want to say this is the last time it will flip, but Hawaii certainly look spent. The only question I‘d be asking if I were Juarez (Mexio) is - where next? And the only answer - Austin. For good, this time.

66

Preferably, a two-way war against Texas with these guys, Canada, who as I mentioned before, have entered the Modern Era. They‘re looking pretty unshaken from their various wars, with a strong core and a none-too-shabby army. I‘d call them a top 10 nation!

67

Lisbon is Portuguese again, but even the most ardent Portugal supporter would be hard-pressed to see them keeping it for any meaningful amount of time. Best case scenario: they keep it for long enough that the rifleman can duck out of the city and get ready to snipe it again.

68

Perhaps I over-hyped the Armenia-Israel war, in retrospect. Certainly very little has happened except the two outdated armies locking horns and wasting ammo. Well, crossbow bolts, in the case of Israel. In the background, a war of about equal relevance breaks out. You know, it‘s just nice to see Yakutia declaring war.

69

In the blink of an eye, Shanghai falls and is recaptured! Things are getting tense for the last few Mao supporters now. If they can just hold off until Genghis runs out melee units... yes, that‘ll do the job... One nation clearly as transfixed by the fate of Mao as we are is Vietnam, who have seemingly called off their offensive on Chamdo to watch the events unfold. Are they even still at war? I don‘t see any units taking damage. If I missed a peace treaty somewhere I apologise.

70

And South Asia is at war once again! Let‘s see if a city can actually flip this time! Akbar of the Mughals doesn‘t exactly have battleships, but his navy is far more advanced than Burma‘s galleass carpet. Can he break through and threaten Rangoon and Pathein?

71

That rifleman didn‘t escape in time. Lisbon is now firmly under the control of the pirates. The chances of them making any more progress (with two pikemen) are non-existent, so where next? Marrakesh looks very unprotected... Morgan‘s Buccaneers have always made pretty good choices as to who to attack in the past (and in Mk. 1 too!) so it‘ll be interesting to see their next move from here. Any nation with a shore on the Atlantic should be quaking in their boots though - Lisbon‘s fall has proven nowhere is safe.

72

Two of this part‘s least relevant civs declare war on the widely agreed kings of irrelevance, Israel. Chances of this affecting the current stalemate with Armenia: 0. Armenia really have to bring their cannons forward if they want to make progress; Hebron could feasibly be captured.

73

As the Inuit flip THOSE two cities in the background, Em and Semiramis relocate. From Helsinki and Carthage to Rubibi and Pretoria... let‘s see what (most likely incorrect) things Jandamarra of Kimberley and Kruger of the Boers have been plotting...

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...next part, as that‘s it for today. No infoaddict sadly, so we‘re left with the religion map. Australia and South America are well on their way to being indoctrinated by Buddhism and Catholicism, respectively. Speaking of which, we saw nothing of Australia or Chile this part. Very little of the Boers either. And former enemies Kimberley and the Maori didn‘t get so much as a look-in. We‘ll have to see how they‘re doing next week. Now for a bit of minimap hunting. Inuit are in control of the flipping Arctic cities, Hawaii retain control of Waipahu... and Sibir capture Bamda! I wasn‘t expecting that. They also keep all of their Soviet conquests from this part. Shanghai clings on to life. That‘s all for today. Thanks to TPangolin for keeping going, and thanks to everyone who supports the game through OC, good conversation, or just reading it every week. You‘re all invaluable. Special shoutout in particular to /u/lordberric, who we‘re all very glad to see return after his hiatus. Glad to have you back mate. This has been Lacsirax Ariscal. See you in the comments for everything I missed!

Part 35: Kick‘em Whilst They‘re Down! – mk2

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