Part 45: The Empire Strikes Back

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Welcome back one and all to this 45th installment of the Official r/Civ 60+ Civ Battle Royale! I‘m u/Samarkhannor, proprietor of AI games over on r/civAIgames and extreme Mongol fanboy. I‘ll be your host for this episode; I hope you enjoy your stay! As we ended the last part, Burma had been taken out, the Maori had nuked and captured Sydney, and war had broken out in Kamchatka; where shall this part take us? Special thanks to many of our subreddit users for these polandballs!

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As always, we have our beautiful city map, by u/Malssistra (replacing u/SylonL) and u/LasciraxAriscal; thanks as always for making this!

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The Inuit remain on top of the Power Rankings this time around, followed by the Boers, and Australia respectively! Take a look here at the full list here: http://imgur.com/a/bY98z

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One more piece of dank before we embark on our quest by the brilliant /u/Jru247

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Anyway, let‘s get to it! The Maori are still holding on to Sydney after their against-all-odds capture of the Aussie capital, but it won‘t last long. Tasmania and Polynesia have fallen into Parkes (Australia)‘s hands, although the once-mighty Wobbegong is looking mighty thin.

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In the Second Kamchatka War, Igloolik and Suntar change hands between the Inuit and Yakutia. Darkhan (Yakutia)‘s former fleet in the Sea of Okhotsk is looking rather... former. A small branch of the Wobbegong Armada watches on, happy to be far from any war that it would actually have to fight in.

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Ethiopia arranges a significant arrangement of artillery and GWIs to wreck Carthage, but if Haile (Ethiopia) isn‘t careful, Sparta‘s fleet will steal all his potential gains, as it already has with Alexandria and the all-important Dvin Canal. A despondent Ayyubid great general stares at the chaos mournfully, having no land in which to plant a citadel, and no troops to which he can boost the combat strength.

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Morocco and Mali sit blissfully unaware of the violence occurring at the other end of Africa. But a bunch of knights aren‘t going to hold long when the orange menace awakens and thirsts from more land, and Mansa Musa (Mali)‘s land holds a source of precious uranium, ever-important in the post-nuclear world.

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Akbar‘s attack on Anuradhapura has long since evaporated, and Lahore is looking as endangered as a Pangolin. Korea and Persia throw moral support in behind Sri Lanka. A Burmese Great Musician flees his burning homeland, escorted by a rifleman, to join the Secret Society of Stateless Musicians.

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An immense black shadow looms to the north of Brazil, and a smaller yet more effective black shadow actually deals damage in the west. Belo Horizonte is back in Buccaneer hands, and Pedro (Brazil)‘s resistance is looking weak and a bit heavy on helicopter gunships (not known for their city-flipping abilities.) Further to the west, Chile consolidates its hold over the former Incan capital in Cusco as Pachacuti (The Inca) flees north amid a brigade of rifles.

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The Finnish carpet draws a sharp contrast with the empty Sibirian frontier, and with the technologically backwards (by comparison) Swedes in the west. Should Kekkonen (Finland) be awakened by someone other than Arabia, the North will forever be altered. In the background, the Buccs flip yet more Brazilian cities.

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All the Khan‘s ships and all the Khan‘s planes don‘t seem to do much good against the White Walkers, who are on the offensive despite an apparent lack of an air force.

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Sydney at last returns to Australian hands, and now the Beast Down Under has truly been awakened. Isolated to New Zealand and surrounding islands (and a small swathe of Central America), the Maori are quickly running out of options, and must act fast before more ships start arriving.

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Despite being majorly culled, Jandamarra (Kimberley) is still able to enter the atomic era. Unfortunately, it‘s come a bit too late. Also, friendly reminder that the Blackfoot still own a city in the Philippine archipelago.

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Amongst the Siberian steppes, our trusted agent Semiramis discovers that Kuchum Khan (Sibir) is working towards acquiring The Bomb. The nuclear arms race shall soon be in full tilt.

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Recruit Ishtar reveals the Finland is plotting to finish off Norway, but Urho (Finland) will have to act fast to do the job before Sweden does. And by 'fast' i mean 'within the next turn.' Prepare to say goodbye to Snoreway.

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I was wrong-- perhaps the Maori still have one more trick up their sleeve, even if it‘s the same one they pulled before. A lone caravel sails straight back into Sydney on a glorious suicide mission, sticking one final (?) middle finger in the face of the unstoppable Australian Empire. Sorry TPang, but I‘m really enjoying seeing Australia finally get put in its place after all these years of doing too well. Now if only someone could do it to the Boers.

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Sejong walks out of his palace, and holds a Samsung Galaxy S6 up to the light. 'We have it! We finally have it! A new time is upon our people-- a time of information! And we‘d like to inform you that the Boers entered this era quite a few parts ago, so we‘ve got some catching up to do!'

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Meanwhile, Mongolia finally has planes and great war infantry. I doubt this means anything to anyone else, but it‘s really exciting for me. Finland plots against yet another civ, this time France. Of more pressing concern is that a backdoor Carthaginian fleet is on the verge of taking Rome, in what could be a roundabout act of revenge for the Second Punic War.

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Wow, Te (The Maori) sure has a lot of fight left in him. Against all odds, he holds onto Sydney and retakes a city that I won‘t bother to type out on Tasmania. However, he‘s in danger of losing Taihape, and allowing the Digger-idoos a foothold on the North Island.

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All good things must come to an end, and Sydney returns again to its rightful owners, along with Tasmania. The Aussies also grab the aforementioned foothold on the North Island, further threatening the Kiwis with sudden destruction. Meanwhile, Iceland acquires nuclear capabilities-- will the smell of split atoms be enough to wake them from their slumber?

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Oh shit, it looks like it‘s time to say bye-bye to North America‘s next weak link! The Blackfoot, already distracted fighting Canada, are attacked by Mexico, and have hardly a handful of land units to hold on to their empire. If the Inuit join in, they‘re really fucked. At least if worst comes to worst, they‘ll have that nice island resort in Olongapo to retreat to.

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Carthage can do little to stop Ethiopia‘s advance, and Haile (Ethiopia) is already plotting his next attack. Liking the taste of conquest, he‘s trying to catch up as fast as possible before the inevitable Boer DOW.

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However, Carthage isn‘t going out without a bang of its own, as Hannibal grabs Rome from the clutches of Leonidas (Sparta). Upon entering the city, the general has but one command: Salt the fields.

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Sri Lanka finally gets a grip around the port of Lahore, and begins gathering momentum around Fatehpur Sikri as well. However, they‘ll want to upgrade their cannons if they want to get anywhere further with the war.

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Back up in Kamchatka, a Finnish trireme slowly ploughs the icy waters of the Bering Sea as the Snowy Showdown rages on around. Sendai falls into Yakkish hands, but it is doomed to flip.

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The Last Legion, yet further separated from its brother the ballista, remembers fondly of the days that it had an empire to go home to. Now, Rome is just another piece in another war between two more powerful civs, and will never again see its righteous owners.

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Fortaleza, Sao Luis, and Manaus all fall under the black banner, while yet another wave of Brazilian resistance gathers. Slowly, the armies of both civs are being worn down, but the Corsair Fleet is remaining intact.

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Faced with a more pressing threat from Mexico, Crowfoot of the Blackfoot peaces out with Canada, getting to keep Itazipcho. In the south, Ahahpitape is looking like a fine location for a new burrito joint.

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Ahahpitape falls to Mexico as a lost and lonely Irish scout watches on, wondering if tequila mixes well with Guinness. I‘m guessing it probably doesn‘t.

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The Qashliq Olympic Games take place, as Sibir put in the greatest chunk of the whopping 44,640 production needed to complete the event. Yakutia comes off with the most medals, winning in the Nordic skiing, Yak-racing, and Olympic sleeping events. Surprisingly missing from the list of highest contributors is the Boers, who were too busy doing Other Things.

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The International Games gives a 100% boost to tourism to Sibir, allowing them to rival Australia for the 20 turns that it lasts. Too bad this is a domination-only game. TPang‘s note: Brazil at some points do take over Australia in terms of Tourism

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Sparta finally retakes Olympia, its long-lost African colony, but Carthage has the means to retake it. Notably, Sweden has essentially given up on attacking Sparta, as there are simply far too many Boer units in the way.

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Yakutia decides it doesn‘t have enough wars on its hands and attacks Chile, who shrugs it off as yet another irrelevant conflict. Meanwhile, a Buccaneer backdoor fleet is sneaking through Bernardo (Chile)‘s waters to strike Brazil from behind.

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Two Maori triplanes on an aircraft carrier hold their final stand against a fair-sized flotilla of Australian ships. Their sacrifices shall be remembered as long as Aotearoa lives.

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Oh damn. It‘s the scourge of the high seas versus the Frozen Chosen-- The Inuit have attacked the Buccaneers! A few parts ago this would‘ve been fairly irrelevant, but now Ekeuhnick (The Inuit) has several undefended ports on the gulf of Mexico, and Henry Morgan of the Buccs has a lot of corsairs itching for plunder. However, if the glacial gladiators bring some units in to defend their Texan holdings, the pirates may be in deep trouble.

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For the moment, however, the Inuit seem more concerned with gaining ground on the Yakutian front, and have done just that with the capture of Isit. Backed by paratroopers and missile cruisers, Ekeuhnick (The Inuit) is clearly taking the advantage.

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Frost-coated helicopters begin arriving at Petit-Goave; are the days of Floridarr numbered? In other news, The Inuit have a nice stack of caravans going on in Houston.

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Corsairs begin raiding Inuit ports, and land units arrive by sea to help secure Petit-Goave. This could be a long, drawn out war if neither side throws their full weight into it.

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Well, RIP Maori. Wairau and Ngaruawahia fall, and Parihaka itself is almost on the verge of being taken. At least Te (Maori) will know that he certainly went out with a bang and left his mark on the world. (Let‘s ignore the Moarexico for added drama for now)

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Time to press F to pay respects for Norway, as they are up in heaven now. Only three Scandinavian powers remain (Iceland counts, right?), and none are going down any time soon, but it had to come at the cost of someone. And Haakon Haakonson drew the short straw.

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Carthaginian troops retake Bilbais and Olympia, but Antium is slipping lower and their core (if you can even call it that) is looking dangerously empty.

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While a line of great artists charges towards Blackfoot lands, Mexico decides to start more wars for itself and attacks Chile. Embarking all of his units while the Blackfoot fleet is still strong might not end up too well for Benito (Mexico), however.

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Imbued with a new sense of purpose with the revelation of the Inuit conflict, Buccaneer troops in the Amazon push further than ever before, capturing Teresina. However, their forces are thin and reinforcements are nowhere to be seen; the South American affair may have to soon come to an end.

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Sparta retakes Rome and captures Antium. The fields must for now be unsalted. In the background, the Maori retake two cities.

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Bombing runs take Fatehpur Sikri down to half health, and Akbar (the Mughals)‘s Farsakh Cannons aren‘t looking so strong against marines.

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Shit just got real in the Pirate-Igloo war, as Ekeuhnick (The Inuit) brings a nuclear missile to a gunfight. Morgan (The Buccs) will need to capture Albany fast before the force of a split atom will be unleashed on his tropical realm.

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With the denizens of Sydney still licking their wounds and sawing off their third arms, Parihaka is taken, consummating Australia‘s revenge against the poor Kiwis. And they never even got to finish their final insult, the Sydney Opera House.

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The Inuit have already acquired a corsair, as the technologically inferior Arrmada is beaten back on the pacific side of the Nassau Canal. The Ice Sheet Fleet is descending quickly and in full force.

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Henry Morgan has taken the first city of the war, however, with the capture of Gonzales. The nuclear missile is moved out of Albany, seeing the threat to its existence in that city.

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The Maori aren‘t done fighting yet, as the retake their capital along with Wairau. Unfortunately, their empire is already broken.

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Pedro (Brazil) is unable to recapture any of his cities, and takes out his anger by declaring war on poor innocent Champa.

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Sparta pulls a surprise cockblock on Ethiopia by capturing not only Olympia but also Bilbais. If Carthage is unable to flip the latter city, Ethiopia‘s hopes of conquering more of North Africa could be dashed.

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Sri Lanka finally makes more progress against the ever-resilient Mughals, taking Fatehpur Sikri. The never-great Mughal Empire is made even less great.

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Gonzales flips back to the Inuit, but of greater interest, Henry Morgan… liberates America??? Yes, good ol‘ Abe Lincoln is back in action in Albany after the good-natured Buccaneers decided the world could still use a bit of his wisdom and virtue. This is certainly a first for the Battle Royale.

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The Boers complete the first Future Worlds wonder, the Enrichment Center. I have no idea what it does, so I can only assume it trains test subjects in the use of portal-based weaponry. The rest of the world better act fast before Paul Kruger releases his deadly neurotoxins.

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Well shit, I was right-- it was from Portal. Maybe I should‘ve looked at the next slide before writing up the previous one. Anyway, 1 science per citizen in the city it was built is probably not going to make much of a difference to the Boers, with their already ridiculous science output.

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Parihaka falls for what may be the last time, and Ruapekapeka is on the verge of doing the same. However, where has the Maori capital been moved to? It doesn‘t seem to be any of the cities visible in this slide.

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Another civ with no capacity to attack Champa attacks Champa. Of more interest is Sibir completing the Manhattan Project, which seems a bit belated given their superpower position and alleged technological advancement.

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Speaking of Sibir, their war against Yakutia is turning into a grinding stalemate, with neither side able to get past the mountain range, and with Mongolia (now equipped with artillery!) blocking the main obvious route through.

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The Maori enter the information era, but something tells me they won‘t be getting much farther than that. Perhaps that 'something' is the fact that they are probably going to lose all of their cities except Uxmal and Laredo.

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Sweden is next in line to complete the Manhattan Project, representing an ever-growing portion of the world with nuclear capabilities. Also, Sweden‘s core looks really nice for some reason.

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Some poor Buccaneer scouts are cornered in the Philippine Sea and brutally slaughtered by Inuit ships. This may be the first of many war crimes to take place between the two nations.

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Ruapekapeka falls; Te (The Maori) is about to lose his last foothold on New Zealand.

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The Buccs take Gonzales and Dallas, but the cities are sure to flip for eternity. Texas, never having made peace with America, works on trying to put Lincoln back in the grave that he rose from.

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Vietnam has not one, not two, but three atomic bombs in Bagan. Where are they pointing? Only time will tell.

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With numerous great artists furiously painting the battles as they unfold, Mexico marches towards A‘aninin. The Blackfoot navy is looking like it could be problematic, however.

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The Inuit forces are beginning to lose ground in Kamchatka, perhaps due to their new war with the Buccs and perhaps in part because of that fat stack of bombers that Yakutia‘s got going on there.

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Both Amga and Beryozovo are under serious fire, yet neither civ is able to reach the other‘s city. Mongolia really needs to pick a side here if anything‘s going to happen.

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And so begins what may be a long string of flipping with Dallas and Gonzales. How long can the two sides keep it up? It will take a serious breakthrough (*ahemnuclearmissilesahem*) for either civ to get beyond the current front.

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And with that, we go on to the infoaddict slides. The Boers still reign king in population, and Morocco still peeks over the bottom of the list as the wild card #13.

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The Maori have dropped precipitously to #30 in population, from once being the most populous civ in the world. This may be attributed to the fact that they lost almost all of their cities.

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Australia gets even bigger with the annexation of New Zealand. Oddly enough, Sri Lanka is #12, above Finland. I‘m guessing that the game counts water as land, and Sri Lanka certainly has a lot of water.

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The Boers remain one tech ahead of the Inuit, but that‘s a gap that can be easily closed. The Maori still have three more techs than Australia, but they‘re undoubtedly going to get surpassed and kicked off the list within the next part or two. Otherwise, there are no surprises here.

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Australia now has 11 more cities than the nearest competitor, boosted by their latest conquests. When will the Wobbegong be stopped?

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The United States crawls from the depths to put themselves back on the list, with a solid 1 city. At least Lincoln‘s not alone in his city-state status.

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Catholicism has almost overtaken Judaism in terms of follower count as well as city count. Islam still holds on to dear life.

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Finally, our religion map shows an ever-increasingly small amount of places remain atheistic, primarily the pacific islands. The Mughal Empire, at the meeting point of three religions, can‘t decide which one to choose.

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Anyway, so concludes this episode of the Civ Battle Royale! It has been a pleasure to be your narrator. u/Samarkhannor out! End card by /u/Cadellinman!

Part 45: The Empire Strikes Back – mk2

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