Episode 5: Bloodstains and Fire

1: Orange you glad I’m back?

Greetings guys, gals, and nonbinary pals! It is I, u/Orangechrisy aka Orange aka the creator of Malacca, back again with part 5! Nearly two years ago I also narrated part 5 of CBRX so it’s great to be back for it again! Last time I just made the same joke a bunch of times and I guarantee I will make it once here too, but maybe this time there will be a bit more variance in my jokes. And now that I have full control over the narration, you won’t be able to escape my hardcore stanning of Malacca.

Between the time I write this and when the part comes out, another cakeday will have passed for me, and I gotta say, getting to narrate a part for the CBR is the best gift I’ve gotten in the past 2-3 years, I just love this community. So hooray for another year of CBR, and time to get on with the show!

2: The fight of a century (maybe)

u/X-Rok delivers us this fantastic rendition of the 5-on-5 beatdown of destiny. Will this big war lead to nothing or will Punjab come from behind with a steel chair and take out the competition? Will Kosovo get the drop on Georgia and force their submission? Will those mouths ever not be unsettling? And of course, will this distract us from the fact that in 1998, The Undertaker threw Mankind off Hell In A Cell, and plummeted 16 ft through an announcer's table? Find out this week on the CivBattleRoyale!

3: Tile-Accurate Map

u/Vihreaa provides us with their always wonderful tile accurate map which is always fantastic. Getting to see the exact borders really helps to get a feel for how civs are looking. Thank you as always.

4: BabylonMap

u/ARedundantSofa also gives us a wonderful map, the absolutely amazing BabylonMap. Smoothed, more natural borders make this map really pleasing to look at and the style is just great. Keep it up!

5: Pretty Sikh

Punjab pushes PARG out of the top spot! They have good tech, good science, good pop, good army size, and good food, but most importantly, they have 14 cities and are tied for top production. They are a behemoth currently, but we’ll have to wait and see if they can manage to hold the top in the coming parts.

6: Tenko-do-go-take-the-capital

We start off this episode with a shot of the Burkina Faso war with the Tauregs, where Sankara looks to finally be setting his sights on the capital of Abalessa. He has a superior army, so it should just be a matter of time at this point.

On the sidebar we can see Tahiti making peace with Hawaii, and the minimap shows no changes in territory.

7: Rumble in the Jungle

Zumbi makes quite the bold declaration of war against Paraguay, he has a slight advantage in troops but his units aren’t near the front at all. The two are evenly matched for the most part, so perhaps Zumbi was a bit too preemptive in starting his strike. Either way, this will certainly be a deciding war should one of the two actually come out on top instead of just a quick peace.

08: Colossal Headway

The Olmecs batter Portmore down to red but Garvey has finally brought his navy around to mount a defense. By the looks of things, Jamaica will stand strong and perhaps even follow up with a greater invasion of Papaloapan. But there is still a chance my desire of a Caribbean Olmec empire will come true, so may Portmore fall.

09: Firezaj

The bolsheviks take and burn Mtskheta from Kosovo, and Georgia has a settler at the ready to replace what was originally theirs. Lenin also pushes on Ferizaj and Peje with a cavalry attack. The native Ukrainians of the region feel a sense of deja vu but can’t quite figure out why.

10: Effortless Defense

It seems for whatever reason the Anangu plan of sending their large army in the sea isn’t helping them, absolutely shocking. Tjilpi instead faces Uluru and dreams with all his might that Mutitjulu is saved. Sadly for him, the gods won’t save him and he sent his army to drown off the coast of New Guinea. William Barak sits at home and laughs heartily at the incompetent enemy he is fighting.

11: The Olmecs getting more ports

My desires were answered! Portmore falls! Jamaica still has five boats surrounding the city compared to the Olmecs two barely alive boats. But it’s something!

On the side we see that Toypurina has made peace with Lautaro with no cities changing hands, and Solano desires more opponents and decides to send a couple of rather strongly worded letters to Garvey suggesting at his idiocy at letting Portmore fall to the Olmecs. Garvey promptly throws the letters out, missing the one declaring war, thinking they were just junk mail.

12: Manchu “manning” up

Kublai Khan forgot how to push and has retreated a few tiles. Perhaps he is gearing up for another attack, or perhaps those units in the water are planning a naval invasion. Either way, Nurhaci celebrates a successful defense by getting incredibly drunk and boasting to anyone within hearing range about how terrible Kublai is. A wonderful night.

While this may have happened earlier, on the minimap I spot another city in Patagonia founded by Palmares. The Mapuche are really quickly losing out on the free real estate that they had. New Netherlands also found a city in Labrador.

13: Dead men tell no tales

In the dead of night, Tjilpi gets onto a horse and quietly leaves town. His capital is on the verge of death with spearmen and horses knocking down it’s doors. He wishes he could have done more, but refuses to admit that his plan to drown his army was bad. He whispers “Scurvy makes you stronger. Scurvy makes you stronger.” as a reassurance to himself as he goes.

The citizens of Coolaroo wonder why they haven’t been attacked yet despite being surrounded on three sides by enemies. “Perhaps we made peace.” they think and return to their daily routines.

14: Perfection

Mmm. Wonderful. Absolutely stunning. Just perfect. Lovely. Malacca holds Hai Phong, and doesn’t raze it this time. Vietnam doesn’t have the ability to take it back so it’s ours for the keeping. Mansur’s navy makes its way to the Gulf of Ha Noi, where it will likely begin to pressure Saigon. It doesn’t seem likely they will be able to take much more with the lack of water access and jungle terrain, but they shall at least hold Hai Phong. I love to see my bois doing well.

In non-Malacca related news (bleh), Taiping becomes the first to colonize the Philippines, perhaps Malacca will follow.

15: Mutitju-lose

William Barak stands at the base of Uluru, having been unable to find Tjilpi, he resigns his search and assumes the coward abandoned his people. A shame, he had wanted to greet the leader personally and tell him thanks for joining in William’s foray into fighting on land. His failure to fight Malacca still rested on him but he patted himself on the back with his accomplishments here. If only he wasn’t on an island he may have been able to replicate this strategy against more foes.

On the side bar we see Lesotho having decided to throw a pin at a map and fight whoever it landed on declaring war on Hejaz, and Georgia and Kosovo putting aside their differences as Kosovo started getting spooked about the Red Army at his doorstep. Not seen is Laos attacking Bhutan, and Bhutan attacking Northern Yuan.

16: Pristine Invasion

Ferdinand I lands a large army onto Greece and brings a large navy into the Aegean Sea. Ibrahim Rugova is startled at how fast it appeared and has no means to fight it. Too late he realizes that his capital may fall.

On the side we see that Barghash bin Said realized that his father was the sultan of Oman living in Zanzibar and he decided that it was time to retake his homeland. Meanwhile, Hejaz makes peace with the Ptolemies, Uzbekistan, and Punjab, and instead starts a fight with the far off Northern Yuan. PARG and Taiping attack Bhutan while Punjab makes peace with Bhutan. Spain attacks Wales.

17: The Mostest Amazing List

Noted Babylonian agent of the sub, Pythagoras, has created his greatest work yet, and oh boy is it great. He has scoured every continent in search of every civ’s technology, and has put together a list of who has the most. As expected, Mansur Shah leads the pack, of course. Malaccan supremacy shall continue to reign! No one can escape their dominance!

Other than our amazing top leader, the Chukchi, Vandals, Nigeria, and the Mississippi all come in second place with 20 techs. The info sheet updated to the last part shows Nigeria, the Vandals, and Malacca leading the way in terms of effective science, with Germany and the Chukchi a bit behind. It’s a tough race at the top here. Somalia and Jerusalem sit at the far back.

18: Dambra-dang-a

Zumbi’s declaration of war is backfiring against him, at least at his core. Paraguay brings Dambrapanga down to red, although they don’t look to have the troops to take it. In addition, it looks like Zumbi has, if anything, moved troops away and towards Marajoara. Things aren’t looking good for our guys in green.

On the side we see Nigeria building Chicken Pizza, and Punjab and Manchu call it quits once they realize that there are three civs between them.

19: Vikings in the Americas

Iceland takes on New Netherlands in a battle of the two naval powers. However, this shot doesn’t show the whole story. Iceland may have little power near the Dutch capital, but they are more likely gunning for the settles in northern Quebec. I don’t doubt that Iceland will take those two cities, but New Netherlands may be able to make a decent push north if they try.

20: Behch-ohno

Here we can see the TAT gave away Seepoosha to the Chinook and it’s immediately put into peril as the Dene attack, also putting the pressure on Kanyak. However, Behchoko is in danger as well.

William Barak, to commemorate his capture of Mutitjulu, builds Petra a fair bit away in a likely more useless city for the wonder. Mansur Shah also builds the Oracle of Bintan, and upon asking for a prophecy, the Pythoness responds “You are the best, and you will be the one who takes over this simu-... world”. He wonders what the Pythoness meant when she stopped herself, but he didn’t dwell on it further.

Hidden, Northern Yuan and PARG make peace, and Palmares and Paraguay make peace, neither with any gifting of cities.

21: Gelephu needs Helphu

Bhutan is facing quite the large threat from Taiping here, Gelephu already being hit and surrounded, it’ll fall soon. Their other cities are luckily protected by mountains, but that by no means means they’re safe.

On the side Tuskaloosa declares war on the Neutrals, saying “We were going to settle that land but then we found you already on it, so give your land to us.”

22: A new innovation in warfare

Here we see Mississippi launching an attack with the settlers. Tuskaloosa calls it a “bold new strategy” that will “take the Neutrals by surprise” and will take no questions.

Kinderhoek starts to take damage as the Icelandic fleet batters its walls. But Peter Stuyvesant sends a large number of troops at the Iceland outpost of Mosfellsbaer. There is a good chance they will take it I think, given how open it is to a naval attack.

Chola hops out of one useless war and into another.

23: The madness of Tjilpi

William Barak, still unsure where the Anangu army is supposed to be, is starting to wonder if maybe war is just like this and why he didn’t do this sooner. He still hasn’t quite figured boats out yet as his navy attempts to take the landlocked city of Amata.

Tjilpi on the other hand is hiding out in Warakurna madly muttering to himself that his plan was perfect and that his people just didn’t have enough faith. Yes, that must be it, they lacked the faith. If only they had more faith the plan would have worked. If only. IF ONLY. A few of his citizens stand outside the shack he is holed up in wondering if they should tell him that he’s not in the governmental building he is supposed to be at.

24: Islands of Paradise

The Kulin send two settlers into Micronesia and Japan’s settler is also trekking its way over. Tahiti doesn’t have a settler in sight, which is a problem as this land should be theirs.

25: Balkan unification effort

Five turns since we last saw this war, Pristina has dropped to yellow and Ibrahim has finally brought over some units for defense. The Italian navy has seemingly disappeared from the Aegean so they just might be able to pull off a successful defense, but it’s looking tight. Ferdinand issues a declaration of “You should just give me it.” which is received with blank stares and a loud “No.”

26: The ruins of Pukatja

William Barak proclaims a feast for the capture of Pukatja. However, in the partying, William accidentally knocks over a candle which quickly starts a large fire that reaches all through town. He escapes the fire and turns around to solemnly look upon the burning ruins of what was his. It was an abandoned city he thought, so maybe it was meant to be.

Tjilpi’s underlings managed to pull him out from where he was and get him to the governmental building he needed to be in to lead. But his men seemed scared of him, as he continued to mutter things about “scurvy”, “faith”, “the plan”, and “the sea”.

27: Pontianak is not yet Laost

Ignoring my attempt at a pun in the title, the war between Laos and VOC has grinded to a standstill it seems, Pontianak in the yellow but Laos seemingly unable to push further. The small area and hilly lands offer a surprising amount of protection.

In the east, Vietnamese troops have been pushed away from Hai Phong and Vietnam instead decides to try and found a city on Hainan. Given that Taiping land, they will most likely settle in one of the two southern provinces which would make it an easy grab for Malacca.

28: Backstabbed Welsh noises

Vercingetorix catches Llywelyn by complete surprise with a massive invasion across the sea towards Abertawe. Seems like Vercingetorix promised Llywelyn that he wouldn’t attack if was allowed to settle three whole cities in Northern England and Llywelyn took the bait. The Gauls are about to become the ruler of Britain it seems.

29: The Supremely Strong Settler Strategy

The settler invasion strategy by Tuskaloosa is rather shockingly a failure and Tuskaloosa is forced to actually send his army on the attack. In the meantime, Tsouharissen manages to take Etowah before the settler strategy is realized to not work. The Great Lakes should provide Kandoucho the natural defense needed to stay safe, so as long as they can make peace without Mississippi retaking Etowah (which seems unlikely), then this war will have been a big profit for the currently ranked 58th civ and a massive failure for the currently ranked 5th civ.

30: Islands of Desire

William Barak seems to be tempting fate by sending his settler ever closer to the Tahiti core. Perhaps if he gets too close Tahiti will put their navy to use and actually take a city for once.

31: One Million Elephants and a White Pontianak

Perhaps I spoke too soon for Pontianak, they are dropped further into the yellow and more elephants swarm the gates. Perhaps I should have taken a closer look at the abilities of the civ since Laos’ great general replacement spawns two war elephants with it and the war elephants have 100% combat strength against cities and double movement through forest and jungle. AKA, those two elephants can do a whole lot of damage. Jan Coen needs to pick them off before it’s too late.

Also, Malacca showing off their new Galleass in their capital. Means they finally got Compass (which they didn’t have when Pythagoras’ list came out). First in the world to the tech, and their tech dominance, means they will be the masters of the sea for quite some time.

32: Operation Sea Lion

I forget if I mentioned it way back when it happened, but Spain is also at war with Wales. So while Llywelyn sends an entourage to Murcia, Vercingetorix pushes on both Abertawe and Caernarfon. Carlos may be able to sneak in and grab Caernarfon with a boat, but either way, Wales is falling hard.

33: Free Amata

Once again we return to the burning city of Pukatja and the naval attack of the inland city of Amata. William’s army has more or less dissipated after he had them all head home and ignore the burning of the city.

The citizens of Amata, after realizing the insanity of Tjilpi and the lack of communications coming from Warakurna, proclaim their own republic. Chants of “We have one composite bowman, we can defend ourselves against the world.” are heard throughout the city.

34: The sleeping housecat

Oh hey it’s Sweden, I always forget there is a civ up here because of how little they have done. A few turns ago the logs said they declared war on Northern Yuan, so that’s something I guess?

35: Abaless-of the Tauregs

Last touched on in the first slide of this part, we see that Sankara has almost succeeded in taking Abalessa. The city is on its last legs deep in the red. Multiple horsemen and swordsmen sit outside the city in wait for the walls to finally be able to be breached. It’s been a long war but Burkina Faso is going to have very big gains from this war. After their initial rise and fall, it seems they are back to having a very strong position in Africa.

On the side we can see the nearby Nigeria has built The Churches of Lalibela, a wonder which provides +3 faith, +1 great artist point, and +1 faith from all specialists.

36: A Pristine attack

Pristina gets knocked down to red as Ibrahim takes out a few more units and gets a bowman in the way in the south. But by the looks of things, Ferdinand has this one in the bag. At the very least Kosovo has managed to push back the USSR it seems.

37: The last breaths of the monks of Gelephu

The swordsmen of the Heavenly Kingdom stand at the doors of Gelephu, ready to sack it. A Bhutanese settler stands behind the mountains ready to resettle the city if it gets razed. Taiping has expanded incredibly fast with settles and soon now actual conquests to back up their position.

38: Watch the fear in their eyes

Caernarfon falls and is burned. The citizens of Abertawe panic in fear that they too will be burned (and given how large the city is, those fears are justified). The city will fall very soon.

Elsewhere on this slide, we see the Gauls sending another settler into the North Sea, Germany sending a settler to Scotland, and Germany saying “Screw you” to the people of Cenabum by citadelling them twice.

39: Olmec waters

I stand corrected once more about my previous prediction! The Olmecs hold the city and only a single Olmec trireme sits nearby. A wonderful starting point for a Caribbean empire. Also, for what it’s worth, the city flipped once as far as I can tell in the logs.

New Netherlands, while fighting in the north, also settle Cuba. Jamaica really let us down on the settling game but no one had any expectations of them in the first place so I guess it’s not so bad.

40: The fall of Gelephu

A Taiping horseman rushes into Gelephu and the city falls. Rejoice at progress in the Himalayas, but also don’t rejoice as another orange colored civ has lost a city and as Orange herself, I feel the need to defend the civs that are the best color.

On the side we see that Iceland (and hidden TAT) have declared useless wars on the Olmecs. It seems they may have both been smuggling money through a rum distillery called “Bear and Vikingr” in Portmore that got found out when the city fell.

We also see Laos and VOC making peace, with no change in cities.

41: The Ganzhou turnaround

With the alcohol of the last celebration gone, Nurhaci picks himself up, founds another city on the Korean peninsula, and launches a counterattack on Ganzhou. And it is a huge counterattack. Kublai Khan seems to just have forgotten that he was at war with the Manchu and has moved his armies away. Truly a devastating combination. Manchu started out weak but they are really picking themselves up now.

42: The hollowed cries of Abertawe

Abertawe attempts to mount a defense but it is too little too late. The city is plunged into red as it gets surrounded by Gaulish troops. Soon they will face the same fate of those in Caernarfon: A brutal and bloody burning. Any who make it out alive and find their way back to Caerdydd will surely be traumatized.

43: The desert burns

William Barak has returned home to Coranderrk, complimented himself on the successful war, and promptly fell asleep. Some of his troops, after witnessing the last of Pukatja burn down, decided they kinda wanted to keep going and made their way to Warakurna, where they hope to put up a fight.

The citizens of Warakurna are scared, their leader has become a muttering mess, constantly saying “faith, “sea”, “scurvy”, and “the plan” over and over again. The citizens are starting to think they too should take over like the citizens of Amata did. They look outside the city walls and see more of William’s men outside, matters may need to be taken into their own hands.

44: Tonkin trouble

Best boats bois are back using their boats to attack Sai Gon and Ha Noi. It likely won’t be successful since both cities have only one tile of access, but there is a solid chance that it may be able to bully Vietnam enough into giving away Sai Gon. Also, the Vietnamese settler on Hainan seems to have disappeared, possibly back on the mainland behind the caravan, possibly killed. Along with this, we see malacca sporting their new Carrack. They should be on their way towards trying to get astronomy soon and their UU, and on the way picking up education (and likely being the first to do so) to boost their science even more.

Anyways I’ll have to take a second to step away from the best civ in the game, Malacca, to note that Kulin has sent a couple ships to just go kill the floating army of the dead of Anangu. Some warriors have fled to Hainan, some are still around the Philippines, and one is trying to make its way to the Taiping core as refugees.

45: The saltiest of mines

Here we see Abalessa once again, teetering on the edge, about to fall, surrounded by enemies. Next time I see this front Burkina Faso better have taken the city. I’m looking at you Sankara.

Anyways, a fun thing you try to do here is play “Spot the Vandal Caravan”. I counted at least ten Vandal Caravans, how many can you see? At this point in the game, they really should only have three but they actually have about 30 at the end of last part. Where are they getting them? Who knows. But they are getting filthy rich.

46: The return of the Neapolitan Crown

Pristina sits on the edge of collapse, a single tap could take it down, and Ferdinand has a full health swordsman sitting right next door. This looks like it folks.

47: The pleas of the damned

It feels like Vercingetorix is putting on a show to traumatize the Welsh. Abertawe sits even deeper in the red, units stand on all sides. It seems there are a number of cities on the verge of falling this turn.

48: A rousing speech?

William Barak’s men take potshots at Warakurna, not exactly sure how to go about the fight without their leader, but at least a general decided to hang around and help them out.

Tjilpi steps out onto the balcony of the governmental building in Warakurna and, addressing a crowd of a few hundred thousand, gives a speech. “There are traitors among us, those who do not have the same faith you all have. For if we all had faith, then the dead would rise and the tides would have turned back against the Kulin long before they reached Mutitjulu. But that did not happen. There are some individuals of this great country, including some here today, who do not have faith, who did not trust the plan, and sold their friends and family out. We must be vigilant in our fighting, and seek vengeance for those lost by those with little faith. We will rise again!” The crowd didn’t quite know what to make of the speech, but it was the most coherent thing Tjilpi had said in months, so they applauded anyways.

49: San-no

It seems at some point Mandukhai decided she had a strong dislike for Japanese settlements in Siberia, and decided to burn them. So far Sanjo has fallen, but with the rough forests and rivers, I doubt she will get any further.

On the side, Willhelm realizes he’s had enough of Ferdinand sitting around Pristina not taking it, and attacks Ferdinand himself.

50: Down it goes!

And Abalessa falls! A glorious sight to see the first slide in this part coming to fruition with the Tauregs being forced into two distant cities. Sankara has truly stepped up and made a name for himself. Now we will have to see who his next target is. They are stuck between the power Vandals and Nigeria, perhaps Sankara will keep going northeast into the Ptolemies? Either way they don’t look like they will fall anytime soon.

51: Crisis in Caerdydd

Abertawe falls and Vercingetorix lights it aflame. Nearly 1 million people were either killed or forced to become refugees fleeing the flames. But Vercingetorix isn’t done, his army marches on Caerdydd, already partially surrounding it. The citizens of Caerdydd are thankful that their city is immune to the burning, but they aren’t immune to the trauma. There are many reports of people fleeing Abertawe breaking down thinking about family and friends still trapped in the burning city.

At the very least on the side we see that they have made peace with Iceland. Along with this, a number of civs in the Americas realize they really don’t like large heads and attack the Olmecs, but none are direct neighbors. Also importantly, Germany declares war on Sweden.

52: Warukunai

Despite the speech, The Anangu people continued to lose faith in Tjilpi as he failed to do anything about the encroaching army. Rumors of his mutterings made their way into the homes of every citizen. The people started wondering if maybe Kulin rule would be better.

Tjilpi once again made an escape, passing by a few Kulin army regiments mistaking him for a refugee, he made his way to Amata. Even if the people there had already thrown away the shackles of his leadership, he still believed he could walk in and take over. The city hadn’t been touched by the war, but soon it would come for them.

53: The Invasion of Hormuz

It seems about 10 turns ago Chola joined in the coalition against Hejaz, perhaps to recoup their losses to Punjab. They have sent a large fleet towards Yanbu and Rabigh, and with Rabigh’s three coastal tiles bordering the city, it will likely fall. Yanbu is a bit safer. Somalia also takes pot shots at Ta’if down south. Hejaz and Somalia both have abysmal science, so Chola will likely be the only one to gain anything out of this.

54: Pristine failure

Pristina somehow hasn’t fallen? Ferdinand? Hello? There’s a swordsman right outside the city gates, why didn’t it take the city? If Ferdinand somehow fails to capture Pristina in this war I will have lost all faith in them, and probably a decent amount of money in stonks.

Wilhelm's war declaration from a while back looks to be quite real it seems, the mountains aren’t going to stop him from taking aim at Gjakove.

55: Tauregain

The Taureg launch a counterattack against Abalessa, and with how weak the city is, they just might succeed. Sankara definitely looks to have the troops needed to retake it if it does fall, but it will hinder their abilities to regrow once the war is over.

Also it’s that time to play “Find the Vandal Caravans”, this time I count 12, how many can you spot?

56: Tauragain

Yep, down the city falls. And quite the push too as Burkina Faso’s 4 horseman is dropped to just two. Sankara’s army dried up real quick it seems so maybe the city won’t be able to be taken back as quickly as I thought.

57: A missing flank

Back to the far north, we find that Iceland has managed to snag Staten Eylant away from New Netherlands. Kinderhoek is in the yellow too. On the other side of things, Peter Stuyvesant has failed to make any sort of push on Mosfellsbaer, but they have sent quite the contingent towards Iceland’s core. I doubt this will be able to do much against what I would assume is the larger Iceland defense fleet. If Peter can’t take Mosfellsbaer then this will be quite the loss for them and potentially cut them off from northern expansion for good.

58: Massacre near Makasser

Warukurna sits almost defeated, completely surrounded. A few missionaries are stationed outside the city, ordered there by Tjilpi himself. They wonder if they will actually be able to help the people or not. They were told they just needed faith, and as missionaries they certainly had faith, but even they recognized they needed a lot more faith if they wanted to prevent the coming takeover.

Above, we see that VOC has sadly become the first civ to found a city on Sulawesi, although it’s location does lend it to little in the means of defensiveness. Even Hawaii may be able to take it off of them if Hawaii ever wanted to do anything in the game.

59: The Republic of Amata

The missionaries give a solemn prayer as a Kulin flag is raised. With William not leading the charge, the city wasn’t accidentally burned down this time. Reports say that no one was able to find Tjilpi in the city and that he must have escaped. Strangely, the people of Amata, while expecting Tjilpi to appear, never saw him. Perhaps he blended in with others, perhaps he got lost in the Australian Outback, perhaps he ended up in Coolaroo and managed to flee on a boat elsewhere, or perhaps he died in transit. Either way, the Republic of Amata has become the last remaining hold out of the Anangu. Perhaps the Kulin will be merciful and allow them to stay, or perhaps they will be ruthless and enforce their continental hegemony. We will have to wait to see the fates of the people of Amata.

60: Pristinely falling

I was ignoring the fallen capital icon on the sidebar, but now we see what it was. Ferdinand finally woke up and ordered the swordsman to attack Pristina, and the city fell. There are still a number of bowmen outside the city, but the nearest melee units are a horseman in the hills and spearmen in the water. Perhaps Wilhelm will be able to sneak his horseman in and take the city. But Kosovo is the loser either way. Ibrahim has fled north to Peje on the coast of the Black Sea, he still has strong defenses so he’s not out quite yet, but losing his capital was a serious blow.

61: Hold the sandy line!

Sankara pulls himself together and gathers a large number of troops to once again assault the Taureg capital. However, Tin Hinan has troops of her own that may be able to hold the line.

On the side hidden away, Chinook and Mississippi declare war on TAT. Zaire and the Vandals declare war on Spain. VOC and Taiping declare war on Vietnam and Vietnam makes peace with Malacca. And the Republic of Amata makes peace with the Kulin, saving themselves.

62: The flames of the fallen

Llywelyn sits on his throne wondering where it all went wrong. Caernarfon was razed to the ground, Abertawe is making its way to the same fate. Caerdydd is beginning to be bombarded. The Welsh have quickly been swept by their green brother, and the fires of their lives slowly flicker out. Soon the lower part of the isles will be united once again, although this time in a slightly more vibrant shade of green.

63: Scandinavian Situation

Despite Wilhelm starting the war, Karl is the first to make moves, pushing on Gothenburg, Strasbourg, and Stettin. However, all of these attacks don’t look like they will be successful. Both civs have large navies, and all the nearby cities sit on quite a bit of coast. Malmo is already in danger, but whoever comes out on top at sea comes out on top of the war. While Wilhelm has a powerbase already, this war will be the make it or break it war for Karl.

64: Pristine counter attack

Ibrahim, after a brief stop in Peje, turns right back around and leads his army into Pristina, taking the city back. There doesn’t seem to be many ranged units backing Ferdinand up here, so there is a chance Kosovo manages to survive this war intact. If Cleopatra wanted to, Capua and Cheti seem quite open to a naval invasion and she has quite the fleet, wink wink nudge nudge.

65: A Shield filled with blood

On the other side of the world, we catch the first glimpses of the war between the Mississippi and Chinook vs the Three Affiliated Tribes. The Mississippi have a huge army marching in, so this will likely be a painful war for the already hurt TAT. And just to kick them while they’re down, their settler near Castalian Springs is about to die too.

66: The Heavens descend upon Ha Noi

Here we see Vietnam having freshly peaced out with Malacca, immediately on the receiving end of a large invasion by Taiping. Taiping has certainly been making a name for themselves, with a rapid expansion of settlers and now other’s cities. Ha Noi is already taking damage and with Vietnam’s army down south, there’s enough that Taiping just may take it. Taiping isn’t slowing down the settling game either though, as they send two more settlers to the Philippines. C’mon Malacca, you need to go on a settling spree again or all the good spots will be stolen.

67: Vandalizing Iberia

In the Vandals war against Spain, Cordoba immediately falls to yellow. A large number of boats also make their way towards Sevilla and Toledo. With how massive the Vandal’s army is, there is a solid chance Spain loses three cities or more. Genseric better be using his far larger amount of traders than he should have to fight the war. Maybe he can take Madrid that way, send a bunch of traders and hope Spain doesn’t kill them.

68: Mos-will-fallsbaer

Peter finally gets to his senses and launches the attack on Mosfellsbaer, quickly bringing it down to yellow. With the troops surrounding the city, he has a good shot at taking it. But he has to go quickly before Icelandic reinforcements take care of his distraction fleet and start pushing him back.

69: Pristine allied aid

Pristina holds on in Kosovan control while Wilhelm, fighting a two front war, pushes on Gjakove and damages Palermo. Things aren’t quite safe for Kosovo yet, but they are looking a lot better.

Ferdinand seems to have forgotten how to really make a land army, as they got to the border of Pristina and then just stopped producing more it seems. Germany jumped on their weakness but who else might too?

70: Strassing about Malmo

Strassburg is no longer in eminent danger, as Wilhelm has pushed north towards Malmo. Sweden has Gothenburg surrounded but a lack of ranged units and the heavy forests make a push on the city hard. But they do have some defenses around Malmo, so they may be able to hold it.

On top of the screen we see something more interesting, Wilhelm has taken Gjakove from the Two Sicilies, pushing Ferdinand out of the Balkans once again.

71: Tonkin Trouble 2: Electric Boogaloo

Back in Vietnam, Ha Noi is still only a bit damaged, and units are starting to move up to defend. Taiping is instead focusing on trying to settle the Philippines instead of launching a stronger attack of the Vietnamese capital. Perhaps it’s just the terrain holding things up, but they will have to get the move on quick if they want to take the capital before better defenses arrive.

72: The Alaskan Frontier

Seems I missed this a few turns ago, but the Chukchi have declared war on the Chinook and immediately Seamysty has been taken down to red and will definitely fall. The Chukchi feel like a bit of a hidden power being stuck in the corner, but they are decently strong. And despite the strength of the Chinook, they have now been pulled into a two front war and really don’t have a navy prepared. We’ll have to see if Lawtiliwadlin will be able to push to Cathlamet, but even just taking the city of Seamysty will be a victory for the arctic civ.

73: Nothing is happening in Valencia

Caerdydd is down to the low red, and Spain appears to be in no position to steal the city, so this one’s going to Vercingetorix. This is gonna boost the Gauls to 12 cities and solidify their position as a major power. Although they still have to contend with the super strong Germans, next time they fight they will fare far better than they did in their first war against their eastern neighbor. Perhaps in a couple parts we will see the two fight and the victor of Europe can be crowned.

74: The conquest of Hispania

Valencia is not the only Spanish city being damaged as back in Iberia we see Cordoba falling to red and more Trihemiolias make their approach. If the Vandals are unhappy then a lot of cities are about to be burned very quickly. Also, while the Vandals do not have much of a land invasion going yet, they do have a fair amount of land forces ready to cross the waters. So Spain better move their armies into position quickly or they will be overrun on land as well.

75: It’s Gjakover now

Here is the aftermath of that previous notification, Gjakove has fallen and Pristina still stands. Those swordsmen could retake the capital, but it’s looking unlikely at this point that the war will end with it still in Two Sicilies hands. Gjakove is in even sturdier hands, as Germany has an entire army surrounding the city and the single coastal province won’t allow Ferdinand much ability to take it back with Triremes. Palermo is behind the Alps, but Gjakove was behind a mountain and it still wasn’t able to stop the German army, so Palermo is in danger.

76: Stalemate on the northern front

It appears the northern German front is quickly turning into a stalemate. Germany can’t get their army onto land, and they don’t quite have full naval dominance to move onto Stockholm or take Malmo. Karl is still failing to push his army into Gothenburg, as the forests and lakes give it ample protection. For what I was hoping would be a big war, this is turning out to be quite the snoozefest. Germany is having better results fighting through mountains than this.

77: Hello Hilo

William, fresh off the conquest of much of Australia, realizes he quite liked war. While his first attempt at a naval war went poorly, he really wanted to try again and prove himself capable. So it was reported on a calm Tuesday afternoon that William Barak sent a letter to Lili’uokalani that read “Dear Lili, I have come to inform you that I plan on attacking Hilo, for I would like to test some of my new boats. Do not worry about it at all, you do not need to defend yourself.Yours, William”

While the idea was good, Hilo lacked the coastal provinces that would make a naval invasion easy, and the composite bowman and horsemen will likely be ample enough protection for the city. Maybe William will find better luck elsewhere next time.

78: The fall of Cordoba

The Vandals have moved nearly their entire western army off the African mainland headed towards Iberia, and with them, they have taken Cordoba. The city is very quickly set alight as Genseric said he doesn’t quite like the way the city looked. With their UU, the city will be burned down extra fast and you know what they say: “The faster you burn, the more war crimes you commit.” Now, Genseric doesn’t know what these “war crimes” are, and neither does anyone else on this cylinder, so it all works out in the end.

79: A man, a plan, a canal, Magangue

I’ll be honest I have no idea when this happened but Portmore was retaken, although it is completely surrounded by Olmec units. Now, they aren’t boats, so it may be a bit hard to do a naval invasion of an island city without boats, but I bet they will figure it out.

Also here, New Netherlands has founded another city on Cuba, and most importantly, Gran Colombia has founded the Manague Canal. With this city, the naval game in the Americas really opens up, as whoever owns the canal (or has access through it) can cover both sides of the continent. Wonderful to see.

80: The return of the Somalians

Looking back at the slides, Al Bahah was founded on turn 138, and looking back in the logs, Somalia declared war on turn 100. And only now is it looking to pay off. In the ruins of the previous Somalian city, Somalia will once again retake their land, this time by taking over a city instead of founding one. Both of the civs are incredibly far behind on tech and are struggling immensely, so we will have to wait and see if being able to take Al Bahah will propel Somalia to do better or if it will put them into the same group as Hejaz, big but useless.

81: Kaiping Kaipong

We return to the Manchurian front to not see how the naval invasion went and given the city hasn’t changed hands it likely went poorly. Between the two civs, an assortment of fighting happens but the two civs remain a bit apart and not really wanting to get into it. Perhaps Nurhaci found more alcohol and started drinking again and forgot to lead his troops.

82: Another one falls, another one to burn

Caerdydd falls, and if it wasn’t a capital it would burn too. Vercingetorix immediately moves towards Casnewydd, the last remaining holdout of the Welsh. Llywelyn looks upon his country as it burns, Vercingetorix not yet sated. Historians hundreds or thousands of years in the future will likely look back at this time and refer to Vercingetorix as a bloodthirsty madman, or if we end up in a particularly dark timeline, that Llywelyn was a weakling who couldn’t fight the glorious might of the Gauls. Perhaps Vercingetorix picked up this attitude after seeing Vienna taken, and he just wanted revenge. We may never know fully, but we do know that the Welsh have been burned to the ground, and western Europe will never be the same.

83: Sucks to be Sukhutit

Back in North America, the Mississippi push on Sukhutit and Sanish, both cities are very lightly defended and the Mississippi army is massive so this looks like it will be a fairly quick and easy war for them. In the west, the Chinook are having less success as they have to push through the Canadian Rockies. At the top of the screen, the Chinook city of Seepoosha is mostly hidden from view but it appears to be the target of the TAT armies instead of defending their southern front.

84: Fighting like Michigan and Ohio

As Cordoba burns, the Vandals continue to push at Toledo with a large force of boats and armies ready to land on the beaches. Spain is still struggling to put up any sort of defense to prevent the Vandals from landing all their troops on the peninsula. This is certainly going to be quite the hit to Spain and potentially take them out of the running altogether.

85: Steamy Seamysty

Up in the north, Seamysty falls to the icy marauders. Now comes the difficult part of pushing through the small gap they have to Cathlamet. While losing this one city does hurt the Chinook, it was a small city and they have more land to settle. But they are lucky that the Chukchi are forced through this small hole as otherwise their entire western side would be flooded by light blue units.

On the side we see that the Olmecs and Jamaica have made peace, and looking at the minimap the Olmecs seem to have secured Portmore. Kosovo also makes peace with Two Sicilies and keep Pristina, good job Ferdinand I shouldn’t have put hope in you.

86: Flip Flop

Al Bahah flips back and forth as Hejaz starts bringing over more of an army. With how little Somalia is sending in the way of forces, Hejaz may actually hold the city in the end. They have the boats and ranged units necessary to keep taking it down and Somalia is just sending spearmen and warriors.

Marajoara builds the Hagia Sophia and I think they don’t have the religious upgrade yet so they will likely grab that. Cleopatra is also looking to settle Ethiopia before Zaire takes all of it.

87: Pushback from the Horn

We see the front again, Somalia is looking like they are in fact sending more units, so they will likely take the city back but it’s still up in the air if they will hold it in the end.

Elsewhere, Hejaz also sends another settler towards Ethiopia. On the side we see that Bhutan made peace with Laos, a number of useless wars began against Vietnam, and the Chinook and Chukchi made peace.

88: A much bloodier Toledo War

Cordoba is burnt to a crisp, it’s people largely killed en masse. The Vandals also drop Toledo quickly to yellow and it’s citizens become very scared for their lives. The Vandals will likely burn the city down too. It must suck to be in Iberia at this point, to the north the Gauls just burned the Welsh to the ground, and to the south the Vandals are doing the same to them. In the midst of this, Nan Madol is built by Genseric in celebration granting +2 culture, +1 great engineer points, and +1 food, gold, and production in Leptis Magna where they built it.

On the side, Iceland and New Netherlands peace out, with New Netherlands taking Mosfellsbaer and keeping Kinderhoek, a massive win.

89: Vietgone

Taiping has broken through the mountains and jungles and has brought Ha Noi down to red with a number of troops surrounding it. The city is near guaranteed to fall. Ho Chi Minh and his troops retreat to Sai Gon which will likely be much harder to take for Taiping if they continue the war.

90: The end of an Eire

On the isles, the last holdout of the Welsh has begun to be bombarded. The nearly million people in the city know what’s about to happen to them and all they can do is hope that Vercingetorix is merciful for once.

Elsewhere, Spain is making an exodus from Iberia and has three settlers in the area, likely ready to quickly resettle Ireland once Casnewydd is burned to the ground. It’s a bit of a cruel part of life where the Welsh will very quickly be replaced by incoming Spanish, soon their culture will no longer exist in the world.

91: A New Town called New Town

The Mississippi army, upon reaching Sukhutit, immediately drop it to red. Sanish is also in the deep red. In response, instead of moving to defend themselves, TAT founds a New Town. The town doesn’t even have time to be given a proper name before Mississippi units surround it. Four Bears what are you doing?

92: A holy revolution

Quite a lot of capitals are falling this part, this time it’s Ha Noi falling to a Taiping horseman. Taiping has a large army still on the march but the mountain near Viang Chan and the many rivers will make that army useless unless it goes over sea.

On the side, Ferdinand, after failing to take Pristina like an idiot, decides instead to attack the crumbling Spanish. But they are unlikely to gain much in the war before the Vandals get to it.

93: Set fire to the graves

TAT, continuing to ignore their southern front, finally do some damage to Seepoosha, bringing it to green. But while doing so, the Mississippi have taken Sukhutit and decided to burn it down. Sanish and New Town are next on the chopping block, solid chance they too get burned. There is a lot of razing in this game and the Mississippi are just going to do it more on their path of destruction.

94: This didn’t happen in Ohio

Toledo falls to the Vandals and they surprisingly don’t burn it down. It seems a one pop city was small enough to not put them in the negatives. Now the push inland shall commence, as their mass of troops around the coast begins to push in. Ferdinand was really too late as his only option for attack was snatched in front of him. Really letting us down here Ferdinand. Come on Ferdinand.

95: War of Attrition

Malmo drops to yellow but only a few Triremes sit outside it with ranged units in the city. Wilhelm has decided that his best move is to found a new city on the frontline, Posen, and it is a solid move as any approaching triremes can be shot at with it and it can produce more boats. Sweden on the other hand has Gothenburg even more surrounded but is still yet to start damaging it. They seem to be having better luck in the naval fight but even that is unlikely to lead anywhere. This is ultimately a war of death for those fighting and no gains for either side.

96: Finding happiness in the darkest times

The great Babylonian Pliny has made his way around the world searching for happiness, and on his travels he compiled a list of which civs like to smile the most. At the top of the list we have Bhutan, who even after losing a city to Taiping, is nearly twice as happy as the Welsh. Wait why are the Welsh so happy after their country burned to the ground, are they masochist pyromaniacs? I guess so.

97: Three affiliated tribes, one affiliated brain

TAT continues to fail at doing much against Seepoosha. The Dene also decide to have some fun and citadel it.

On the side, Malacca attacks Bhutan and they have a chance to do something in the Bay of Bengal potentially, so hopefully they can. There’s also hidden Northern Yuan making peace with far off enemies and a few people not close to Spain attacking them.

98: Sayonara!

And there we hit it, the final slide of this part. We get a nice overview shot of a location really not seen much in this part, South America, and the massive Paraguayan army along with the surrounding Mapuche cities. If Solano wanted to, he could likely attack any of his neighbors and win handily with an army of this size, so hopefully that happens.

What a wonderful part of bloodshed, burning, madness, and destruction this was. I hope that I did not make this too painful to read through and that I provided some enjoyment to everyone. I had fun writing some more narrative bits to this like Tjilpi’s madness, hopefully people liked it and that it wasn’t just a waste that was useless to write.

Anyways, a huge thank you to BC for letting me narrate and for making the CBR possible, and thank you to the community, I love you all. And remember, there was no Malaccan bias here, none at all. Praise be Malacca!

Episode 5: Bloodstains and Fire – S2

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