Power Rankings: Episode 26 – S4

Release Date:

October 07, 2024

Narrated by:

Power-Rankers

Abstract

Power Rankings! The rankings…of power! Dun dun dunnnn!

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Florida

1 / 0

1: Florida

Leman:

Gonna be honest, you guys should have seen this coming. Florida was penned as awful from the moment it was voted in – a weak starting location, underpowered uniques, and a leader that failed to play the game properly. All this adds up to a civ that was mostly expected to be weak and completely lived up to that expectation.

Florida’s history included little more than the settling of no more than three cities. Those cities were picked off one by one, by Taino of all civs, until they were left with none. Their highlight came when they gave a city to Osage, after a fairly good defense, only to watch it be captured and burned by Seneca, letting Florida cheekily resettle their city. Sounds like a scam MacGregor would pull. Too bad it wasn’t very good.

1: Florida

Leman:

2: Alaouites

Reformer:

Death creeps ever closer to the Alaouites. We’ve had a good time laughing at the incompetence of Sierra Leone, and then at Kanem’s snipe, but these frivolities only delay the inevitable. The Alaouites can play the role of jester for only so long. Death may be as close as next episode. I for one await it eagerly. Maybe next season we can have Almohads…

3: Mamluks

Nathanmasse:

The Mamluks stay steady in the ranks but with only one civ below them that’s not a good sign. This episode they found themselves in a war with Kanem-Bornu which is a bit concerning to say the least. Just looking at the units, we might think the Mamluks could be able to hold a defensive line, but Kanem has a way of performing better in wars than we would expect, so the Mamluks are probably doomed. But at least they were able to reach their unique unit, so they can die happy.

4: Burgundy

Leman:

Burgundy sits as a broken civ struggling to hold on against the English horde. This is England at its peak, by the way. Both English UUs are unlocked and the UA is churning, heavily damaging Burgundy’s last couple cities. Luckily, things are a little bit more precarious for other civs and England is distracted.

5: Royal Hungary

CelestialDalek:Surely, Royal Hungary is going to die soon. Bavaria has an army of musketmen knocking on the doors of Csejte. They recently made peace with Latvia, which saves them from any havoc that UImanis could wreak. Sorry, I’m being told that my analysis is all from the episode a month and a half ago. Luckily, literally nothing has happened since then so I’ll just keep this narration.

6: Makhnovia

NopeCopter:

Nothing much to say about Makhnovia this episode, their population is stagnant despite being in the middle of a Golden Age and they’re as trapped as ever. Who knows, maybe they could attack Royal Hungary? When your war record against a Black Sea invader is worse than the Kievan Rus’ against Turkey, though, it’s not exactly easy to be confident.

7: Kalmyks

ECH:

Man, it’s been a long while since we’ve had any actual gameplay actions to discuss with regards to the Kalmyks, huh? Hope you’re OK sufficing with yet more statistical oddities for them, because they’ve somehow, I genuinely can’t think how, driven themselves into a -80 gold per turn black hole, which has helped in turn drive them to a bottom 5 effective science rate. Not what you need when you’re a quasi-rump. Well, at least they’re still just about number one in Happiness, compliments of their religions beliefs and spread.

8: Eswatini

Leman:

Ndongo declares war once again, which is very bad for little Eswatini. Ndongo has powered up considerably since the last war, and now has almost double Eswatini’s military making the next dozen turns completely crucial. If Eswatini can defend properly and leverage its navy to bombard the invaders, and kill more units than they lose, things can work out. But if Ndongo can utilize its tech, production, and military lead effectively ,this might be enough to push Eswatini off of Africa’s mainland.

9: Tehuelche

NopeCopter:

The Techuelche might just be the saddest civ on the cylinder right now - one of those civs that can really only be exciting by getting mauled by the right power. A civ that people are actively rooting for the death of, not because of anything they’ve done but just to make another civ stronger. A civ that is apparently somehow still not the least popular civ in the game. Cone.

10: Finns

Orange:

The remnants of the Finn coalition are finally receding, they’re safe for now. Ume Sami and Latvia remain friendly. Just remember: Stand still, stay silent. If they do that they’ll survive for quite a long time.

11: Bukhara

CelestialDalek:

Bukhara sure is Bukharaing. They are at peace with the entire cylinder and Balkh got citadelled off from the rest of their empire this episode. Nothing to report that’s at all interesting.

12: Seneca

Reformer:

Seneca just got to watch the continent implode this week. Osage and Pueblo are at war, Florida’s dead, Taino also declared war on Osage…oh, but Seneca did have something happen. The renaissance navy of New Holland finally arrived on the Senecan coast after eons passed. Few expected the Dutch to actually move an entire fleet over to the eastern seaboard, but hey, they’re here now, and they’re harassing poor ol’ Seneca. What did Seneca do to deserve this, c’mon. It’s unlikely to go anywhere, either, on account of the Senecan coastal cities being absolutely god-awful to siege by sea. NH can have advanced ships all they want, terrain will triumph. Praise be defensible terrain!

13: Mongolia

Nathanmasse:

Mongolia finally catches a break, as the Selkups end their invasion and Shang is struck a withering blow in the east. But all this really does is amend their downward momentum and leaves them steadily in 41st place. There is still the chance of renewing an offensive against Shang as Mongolia has more advanced units, but when sandwiched between the Selkups and Goguryeo there are few prospects of them returning to their former rankings.

14: Shang

Nathanmasse:

Things were just starting to look up for Daji—taking a few Mongolian cities, her own cities being productive again—but now she faces her greatest threat yet. Goguryeo is back on the offensive with muskets, cannons, and cruisers and there’s little chance Shang’s crossbowmen, swords or trebuchets will prove a match. On top of that, they’re still at war with Mongolia who might be on the back foot but still has more advanced units. I don’t want to be too pessimistic, but if they don’t get a peace deal soon they could see themselves pushed back into the Himalayan foothills.

15: Visigoths

Reformer:

Visigoths do a good job of holding on against the combined power of Faroes and England. See how impressive that sounds? Propaganda is so easy. Unfortunately in practice it is not nearly as impressive, considering Faroes are only nominally involved after the Battle of Reccopolis ended in a pyrrhic Visigothic victory. England in the meantime has become bogged down against Burgundy (again). Leaving Visigoths mostly untouched…well, emphasis on mostly. The English navy does not lack ambition like the Faroe navy does, and it is not needed for the Burgundian war either, and thus Emerita has come under serious naval siege. Though the English navy is largely medieval, Visigoths aren’t doing much better technologically, and thus Emerita is likely to fall - or, realistically, likely to flip back and forth a few times, devastating yet another Visigothic city. Such is the cost of waging war in your own territory. Even if Visigoths remain intact after these wars, they’ll be too weak to achieve anything beyond fighting another defensive war in the future. In truth, their fate was decided many moons ago…

16: Tiwanaku

CelestialDalek:So, uh, Tiwanaku. Bottom line is that they’re not doing too great, but they’re putting up a solid fight. Against all odds, Bora-Bora decided against trying too hard on the Parana river front, and just left Alegrete in the deep red to be captured on turn 1 of episode 27. None of the other fronts have seen anywhere close to that measure of successful defense. Ichabamba has flipped to Bora, seemingly for good, and the Ecuadorian swarm overwhelmed Lukurmata. Tiwanaku’s other coastal city, Pampa Koani, is also in the red and doomed to fall to Bora on the first turn next episode. But their defense is falling, and as Ecuador has broken through Lukurmata, their northern flank has become significantly weaker and will need more resources. Their wars are unlikely to spell their doom, but seem certain to spell their irrelevancy.

17: Bavaria

NopeCopter:

You’ve gotta respect Bavaria for keeping up the good fight, not giving up against Royal Hungary even now. However, depending on how things end to their west, they might be in a bit of trouble soon. As hard as they’ve tried to fight the inevitable, Bavaria is still surrounded - they’re in a defensible position, sure, but with Latvia to the east, Rome to the south, and a Faroese outpost to the north, England uniting the west would really spell trouble for Bavaria (especially given how their last war with England went). Then again, the Fortress of Europe has shrugged off many nasty wars before, so maybe they’ll stick around for plenty more time to come. It’s always hard to tell with these defensive types.

18: Qarmatians

Reformer:

Qarmatians could be in a bit of trouble in the near future. Afsharids are hitting a power spike as they acquire both of their UUs, and are in a bit of a lull, awaiting their next target. Qarmatians are not particularly strong, and thus it naturally follows that Afsharids might be coming this way next. Qarmatians have a few aces up their sleeve, though. For one, Qarms have a much better track history in war, including against Afsharids themselves. Secondly, the Persian Gulf is largely in the way, and would deter much of the invasion. Whether these factors would be sufficient is another thing. Afsharids have pretty much every other advantage: stronger military, exactly 200 more production, and a sizable tech lead. It certainly wouldn’t be painless.

19: Mogadishu

ECH:

Mogadishu has ended this part at war with 9 civs, the target of a global coalition of unclear cause. However, the closest these wars have gotten to relevance is Kanem-Bornu on the same continent, or perhaps Singapore having the ability to cross the Indian ocean if they really wanted to. And so, life continues to languidly pass by for the denizens of Mogadishu’s sleepy coastal empire. They’re probably in for a rude awakening one of these days when their cozy nap ends…

20: Nivkh

Cloudy:

Nivkh finally made peace with Thule this week with a final loss of just one city. Overall, it was an impressive showing against a much stronger civ, and it signals to us that Nivkh isn’t going anywhere anytime soon. But at the same time, their expansion routes remain just as cut off as ever. So 34th they remain.

21: Taino

Msurdej:

Well would you look at that folks, The Taino managed to get to 33rd. This is their highest ranking so far, and comes off the backs of eliminating Florida. However, this might be the peak of the Taino. Agüeybaná II has found the ire of the Osage, which could lead to him losing everything he has just gained. But if they manage to survive the Osage assault, then eliminate the Seneca, Taino could find themselves in control of the US East coast.

22: Osage

Leman:

Osage vs Pueblo (and Taino and Thule) is a bit of a controversial war. Most of the PRs are betting on Pueblo, leading to Osage’s dip in the rankings. But I’m not so sure. 100 turns ago, yes, Pueblo probably would have completely stomped Osage. Now? After Pueblo lost its Pacific empire to Goguryeo and lost to Yellowknives? Pueblo seems to have short circuited, failed to really improve its stats in a long time. I think the two are more or less even now. Pueblo leads slightly on military but are essentially tied in production. Pueblo does have an ally in Taino, but if anything, that might be a liability, as Taino’s newly acquired Floridian cities might just be easy targets.

23: Khoshuts

NopeCopter:

The Khoshuts had a quiet episode this part, citadelling Bukhara and declaring a few useless wars. This is fine. Concocting a new stupid plan takes time. Bullshit is an art, and the Khoshuts are masters of the craft. Trust in the process, they’ll be back to give away a city for no reason or completely run over some unsuspecting mid-tier civ before long.

24: Vijayanagara

Reformer:

Vijayanagara is having a nice quiet episode :)

25: Ikko Ikki

Orange:

Their neighbors are fighting and Ikko’s just chilling. I mean, 17th on stats, really good tech, what could possibly keep Ikko Ikki down now? Yeah that’s right, nothing. There’s nothing that could at all be threatening their potential future. Definitely not. It’s all smooth sailing from here.

26: Siam

NopeCopter:

Siam doesn’t move, in-game or in the PRs. As one of very few civs not at war, they have the opportunity to grow while all their neighbors (hopefully) throw their resources around recklessly. But not all of their neighbors are in RELEVANT wars, so the unfortunate truth is that they’re probably still trapped. Their place in the stats has gone down too, relatively speaking… honestly this is just kind of depressing, I feel bad for Siam. They’re too cool to just be trapped forever. It’s not like they’re not trying, either. Maybe they could beat Vijayanagara or the Khoshuts and break out that way?

27: Ecuador

NopeCopter:

In an incredible and frankly unbelievable twist of fate, Ecuador has been seeing legitimate military success against Tiwanaku! It remains to be seen just how much further they’ll be able to push, but this is just the sort of thing they needed to remain competitive. Or, well, I say that, but realistically being trapped between New Holland, Mexico, and Bora-Bora still isn’t exactly a great look. But at the very least, they should be a lot more prepared when one of them comes knocking! Ecuador still isn’t exactly looking poised to be the winner of South America, but at the very least they’re in a good spot to stick around for quite some time now.

28: Kanem-Bornu

Orange:

RIP to the best city snipe in this mk so far, we’re really worse off now. But hey, they did it once maybe they can do it again? Who’s to say. All I can really say is that they certainly punch above their weight, and their neighbors better watch out next time they fight.

Also they are at war with the Mamluks again, maybe this will be the time they finally go out.

29: England

ECH:

This has been an episode of sweat for England first and foremost, a good old classic European manpower meatgrinder with a three way war between them, Visigoths and Burgundy. Has it been worth it? Well, if jumping up one rank is any sign, then yes overall, but maybe not in the most efficient way. As of this episode’s end, a fleet looks to flip a city in IRL Portugal and Burgundy’s forces look pretty beaten back from Autun, with the potential for continued pursuit certainly in the air. If England truly does come out of these wars with more gains, it’d be fair to start calling them the contender of Western Europe this season… although the Faroese Sword of Damocles forever hangs over Henry’s head.

30: Saba-D’mt

Orange:

Saba needs to like, get up and do something. They’ve just been hardly building an army and failed against the technologically and militarily inferior Kanem-Bornu, and now Mog is looking much stronger. They have production, they just need to use it better. They have such a good position on the continent that they’re squandering.

31: Ume-Sami

Msurdej:

The only places we saw Ume-Sami were in the maps in this episode. From that we learned a few key things: Ume-Sami is one of the few countries without war, their population is declining, and they are unhappy. This last bit might prevent them from going to war anytime soon, but even the Finns are heavily carpeted at this point. There’s no good solution for Rijkuo-maja at this point besides coalitions.

32: Noongar

CelestialDalek:I don’t know how to rank Noongar. Every episode, a seemingly overwhelming Noongar force descends upon Nipaluna, aiming to inflict the next casualty in the long-running Australian feud and maybe open up a front to Palawa’s capital. Every episode, they fall short. This week, we saw Nipaluna fall into the red, before technologically superior Palawa forces drove the attacking army back. Nothing ever happens, and Palawa has the advantage of technology, so they get the upper hand in the rankings. Such is life.

33: Pontus

Cloudy:

There hasn’t been any change to Pontus’s position this week. We’re still waiting to see who they will target next, if anyone. But they need to be more active than this if they want to break into the top 20.

34: Dzungars

Msurdej:

The Dzungars have swept into the Selkup countryside! And...that’s about it. Al’myak is still in the green, Hsia is nowhere near at risk, and Galdan still managed to lose troops. Plus with the Selkups ending the war with Mongolia, they can now put their whole attention into fighting off the Dzungars. Maybe peace would be the best solution?

35: Afsharids

Msurdej:

Ol’ Nader Shah was mentioned a few times in this part, but didn’t do much of consequence. We met their new UU in the Jazayerchiha, we learned they were in a Golden Age, and they helped Ndongo go to war with the Eswatini. Not much for them, and sure a lot of deviation between rankers (the most this part), but that’s enough to keep them at 19th.

36: Rome

Msurdej:

Speaking of staying still, we have Rome. They may have ended their peace time, but the war with Mogadishu is more saber rattling than anything. Their army is one of the largest in Europe, second only to the Faroe Islands. The big issue is how to effectively use their army. Much of their navy only has 1-2 spots it could effectively fight in, but that might be enough to grab a city like Pharnacia.

37: Pueblo

Cloudy:

Rankers placed Pueblo everywhere from 14th to 27th this week, with the variations depending on the predicted outcome of their latest war against the Osage. Some of us think they’ll bring enough troops to the front and Osage will be distracted by Taino, allowing Pueblo to turn this into a significant win. But others think Pueblo will have a hard time getting troops over the mountains and Osage will focus on their border cities, leading to a draw or even worse, a loss. On balance, we haven’t changed Pueblo’s rank, and we won’t until the outcome of the war is more obvious. But personally I think they have a real shot.

38: Kazan

ECH:

Oh come on, I already complained about finding Kazan boring last week, and this week really didn’t help! Apparently, if you don’t include military, they’re 15th in our stats calculations, for what little that’s worth? They certainly have options, both for pushover and challenging campaigns, so please, do one of them!

39: Sierra Leone

Nathanmasse:

Sierra Leone gets a small boost this week thanks to the tenacity of the Alaouites flipping Marrakech back. Their units creep ever closer to Meknes so there’s a good chance we see them finally eliminate this thorn in their side. On the other side of the Atlantic, their naval units raid into Taino’s home waters, but given the incompetence shown against the Alaouites, I’m not too concerned for the Taino at this point. In other news, Sierra Leone is researching Industrialization so we may very well see them join the ranks of the Ideological civs next episode.

40: Singapore

ECH:

Well, thankfully Singapore picked a fun ideology, because otherwise it was another quiet part for the multi-city-state. Neutrality is a modded ideology that allows a civ to pick from a selection of other ideologies tenets, so hopefully they get some of the better ones picked up. Outside of that, I must say, Yew doesn’t seem to have the carpet being developed I’d expect of a civ with so many nearby threats, so I hope he’s just got a trick up his sleeve.

41: Thule

NopeCopter:

The Thule war with the Nivkh has finally ended and they sure made it look harder than it needed to be. This is actually a detractor for their rank as they’re left saying, “now what?” They’ve been shown to be no real match for the Yellowknives, which means their only options for expansion is Ikko, Goguryeo, or Nivkh again. Not that these can’t be viable options, it’s just that the Thule seem more boxed in than ever.

42: Ndongo

Orange:

Ndongo vs. eSwatini 2: This Time It’s Personal. Will this be the beatdown of the century where Nzinga takes on a power 1/4th her size militarily and more than 10 techs down? Find out next time on C B R!

Yeah I mean I think they will probably do well here, but Ndongo’s failed some previous wars so who’s to say. But things are looking optimistic.

43: Palawa

Leman:

Palawa really beefed their Noongar invasion. What seemed like an opportunistic strike while their rival was occupied has been turned on its head. Bora-Bora’s timely war declaration forced Palawa to divert its navy from the south and much of its production towards defending its islands. Now, Palawa is on the defense, their dreams of conquest have evaporated. But to their credit, this is a very good defense. Both Noongar and Bora-Bora are formidable enemies and Palawa has been able to hold Noongar on land and swat away Bora-Bora on the seas. I did hope for much more when Palawa declared war on Noongar a few parts ago but, I’ll settle for this.

44: Latvia

Cloudy:

Latvia is a civ that I constantly struggle to make sense of. Their stats are great, but they look like crap in-game and their war record is atrocious. They never seem to have any units, yet no one even tries to invade them. We keep ranking them in the 10-11 range because we can’t decide who to put there, so we just pull someone from the upper part of the info addict rankings. It’s really bizarre. At some point the other shoe has to drop.

45: Mexico

CelestialDalek:Mexico continues to stay barely in the top 10. Apart from the city of Kanagawas being in frame for the fall of Florida, we saw pretty much zero Mexico this part. And that’s a shame. Based on their carpeting of Kanagawas, a Mexican attack on Osage or Taino could turn into a fruitful war that would result in picking up a few cities here and there. There are a lot of precariously defended cities in the plains of America. But who knows maybe their core is entirely empty?!? (it is not)

46: Zheng

Orange:

Zheng takes the part to have some peace and build up, only real issue is that their biggest rivals are now Wahgi and Gogurt, both of whom are building up more, one while expanding too. They really need to rush get Industrialization and start building those factories already! Otherwise one of the two is gonna start knocking on their doors and it won’t be as easy a fight as Ikko Ikki was…

47: Bora-Bora

ECH:

Busy busy part for Bora Bora, and not exactly what I’d call a clear win or loss overall. On one hand, Puni has tangibly only gained cities overall through his two ongoing wars with Tiwanaku and Palawa, stealing a few isolated islands from the latter and seemingly securing a Western port city in South America from the former, and hopefully BB should pick up the great Pampas city of Alegrete next episode too, expanding their secondary core further. The contrary perspective is that for a civ with habitual low production problems, they need to be careful how they spend their carpet, and both wars have seen them throw waves of units into the enemy for less returns than one might hope. It may be time to think about wrapping up these wars once the easy gains are grabbed, although neither of these opponents are pushovers to my mind, and securing peace now may not be an immediate action.

48: New Holland

Leman:

New Holland is a naval civ. Which is weird, I know, but it shows when New Holland fails to conquer the rotting corpse of Tiwanaku after dozens of turns but is seemingly making progress against Seneca a whole continent away? I think that defenders advantage will probably prevent New Holland from succeeding in their invasion of Seneca but I am absolutely hoping I’m wrong.

49: Selkups

Msurdej:

With their war against Mongolia ended, Vonya can now turn his full attention to the invading Dzungars. They may not have a large army any more (it’s actually a smaller army than the Dzungars’), but it should be enough to lift the siege of Al’myak. After that, they can focus on rebuilding their military with their strong production and go for another round against either Mongolia, Kazan or the Dzungars themselves.

50: Yellowknives

Nathanmasse:

The Yellowknives hang onto their 4th place rank as the Selkups hit a speedbump and the continent descends into war around them. They’ve been taking their time rebuilding what was once Crow territory, and their stats are top tier so there’s no rush to take action yet. But with war breaking out among all of their neighbors, we can only hope that they pick a side to join in the fun.

51: Faroe Islands

Cloudy:

The Faroe Islands have fallen below 2nd place for the first time since episode 3, if you can believe it. They’ve even fixed their happiness by adopting Order. But the solution is temporary. The increase in happiness set off a period of explosive population growth that now threatens to push then back below zero, and their war record remains atrocious. They’re allowing England to slowly consolidate western Europe and they don't appear to have any intention of doing something about it. They’re also not bringing their naval hammer down against the Visigoths like they could. In general, we just feel like the Faroes are at risk of being eclipsed if they don’t act, and history doesn’t suggest that they will.

52: Goguryeo

Cloudy:

After five episodes on top of the pack, Goguryeo has been booted to number two not so much because of anything they did, but because our new #1 is developing scary techs so rapidly. Goguryeo actually didn’t have a bad episode at all, with their timely war declaration against Shang netting them a near-immediate capital capture, as well as the arctic outpost of Zhengzhou. Although we expect the Shang capital to flip back and forth a couple more times, it will likely end in Goguryeo’s hands, and we have no real reason to think Gwanggaeto will rest on his laurels after that either. But even with this much momentum, it’s hard to compete against a civ that just unlocked airplanes. Which brings us to...

53: Wahgi

Reformer:

Welcome to the top spot for the first time ever, Wahgi! Hope your stay is longer than that of Goguryeo’s, but shorter than that of the Faroes! (I mean seriously, talk about not knowing when you’ve overstayed your welcome.) Wahgi climbs above Faroes and Gogurt by virtue of a few factors. Firstly, they have better stats, sure, but the trio’s stats are pretty even, let’s be real. Next, Wahgi’s ever-impressive tech lead has led them to some rather critical military technologies. Namely, they’ve acquired Biology, Dynamite, and FLIGHT in quick order. That’s right: oil, artillery, and planes to utilize the aforementioned oil. Admittedly, the mostly-maritime empire of Wahgi might not have the most land-based oil, but they’ve already proven they at least have SOME, as Wahgi is indeed the proud owner of the first warplane on the cylinder. A most impressive feat, and a herald of a whole new chapter of warfare for the cylinder. All will quake in fear, I’m sure. At least once Wahgi puts those bad boys to use.

In the meantime, it becomes pertinent to evaluate through less obvious criteria, namely war competence.

Faroes obviously are the worst of the three, having 0 ambition whatsoever. Truly an embarrassment for superpowers everywhere. Not to mention the dozens of turns where they had under -20 happiness.

Gogurt next is a bit better. But only a bit. They are at least a bit more ambitious than Faroes, and somewhat more competent too. But the war against Mongolia is a stain on their reputation that they may never get rid of. Absolutely disgraceful as well.

So that leaves only Wahgi. Wahgi notably has fought wars against most of their neighbors. Not all of these wars were victories, of course, but they are certainly not lacking in ambition. And in terms of competence, one only need to look at their wars with Maguindanao and Zheng. Both of these civs were aggressors against Wahgi, and both were inevitably pushed back. Maguindanao even paid the ultimate price. Zheng’s fate is yet to be seen. But all the same these wars show that Wahgi has the burning desire to win. They lack in neither ambition nor competence. Truly a contender for world domination.

But the future is not easy for Wahgi - that grit will still be needed, again and again, if they wish to beat their many strong neighbors. Bora, Palawa, Noongar, Singapore, Zheng…all powerful in their own right, and in their own ways. Just imagine if Wahgi could have the opportunities of the Faroes. They’d be unstoppable. God truly knew Wahgi would be too strong if they were given weak neighbors.

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