1: Finns
Msurdej:
Here lie the Finns.
They never got any real wins.
They got one forward settle,
then did nothing of mettle.
Until Latvia kicked in their shins.
Power Rankings: Episode 37 – S4
January 06, 2025
Power-Rankers
Abstract
Power Rankings! The rankings…of power! Dun dun dunnnn!
Viewing: Vertical
2: Qarmatians
Orange:
As one of the great philosophers of our era said: “Wowie Meowie”. At the start of the part they were at eight cities and looked like they could take a shot at the battered Saba soon to mount another Qarmback. But now here they lie, dead in the desert, still bleeding from the bullet wounds of every single one of their neighbors. This wasn’t just a death, this was an orchestrated slaughter, an extermination of a people so swift it’ll make historians question if they even existed. Another Qarmback will not happen again, this is the end. I think we all wished they could’ve done better, they really are such a cool civ. Such a shame they couldn’t break out.
3: Mexico
Leman:
Hi. It’s me. The biggest Mexico doubter on the PR team. And, uh, well I didn’t expect it to go this bad. I was a “Mexico should be 14th not 8th,” kind of hater. Not a “Mexico is awful and should be dead.” To be honest, Mexico’s northern hold against Yellowknives was pretty decent, they kept back a much, much more powerful enemy. It was the South American front that collapsed completely against New Holland. Which sort of makes sense, those cities are less productive, have worse defensive terrain, and New Holland had naval support. And the painful peace treaty also kind of makes sense, things were not looking like they were getting any better for Mexico. I dunno, I guess I expected a 7-city rump left over when all was said and done.
Mexico doesn’t really deserve the bottom half placement that they’re getting. Mexico was a strong civ that played very well, picked up on opportunities presented to it and broke down enemies that it didn’t seem like it could. They had top tier military throughout most of the BR and solid stats that were just not quite enough to break into the top tier. They were a good civ that I wish had stuck around a little bit longer.
4: Shang
Lasqueto:
Yep, Shang are still kicking. Goguryeo are basically the only civ who could really eliminate them right now, so they’ll presumably be here up until Gwanggaeto notices one of his cities flying the wrong flag. Then they’ll be out of here faster than Kraven the Hunter at the box office. Goodness knows what Daji’s thinking; she probably wants to get out of here as soon as possible and get back to Elizabeth on the sub. I don’t blame you girl.
5: Visigoths
Msurdej:
Finns? DeadQarmatians? Dead Mexico? Nearly Dead
Visigoths? Up three ranks by standing on their bodies! Sure they're dead the moment Sierra Leone or Faroe Islands stop picking on Rome and go for them, but for now, they can turtle and wait for the sweet release of death.
6: Kazan
Lasqueto:
Not much to say about Kazan this part. Just a continuation of their slow death by citadels at the hands of Latvia and their neighbours. Their empire looks spindlier and spindlier with each passing turn. Killing them would be a mercy at this point.
7: Seneca
Orange:
Woooo other civs dying so big ups for the Seneca fans! They did it! Top 30 babyyyyyyy! Haven’t been this high since part 2! (Part 0 rankings had ‘em first, part 1 rankings had ‘em second, part 2 had ‘em 30th). So hey, good times are being had, better hold on to them.
8: Bukhara
Cloudy:
Bukhara wasn’t mentioned this week, which is good news from them. I fear that next time they’re mentioned, it might be the last.
9: Osage
Nathanmasse:
Well, the good news is Osage doesn’t need to worry about Mexico anymore. While it’s a bit of an issue that Yellowknives now control the corridor cutting through their territory, the reality is that if the Yellowknives come calling it won’t matter anyway.
10: Bora-Bora
Cloudy:
It looks like Bora-Bora is on the fast track to rump status. There’s no coming back now that Wahgi has broken into South America. The only question is whether they will even survive, and if so, with how many cities. Truly a terrifying end for a civ that was once on top of the world.
11: Ikko-Ikki
Msurdej:
It looked at first as though Ikko-Ikki would be in serious trouble, as Thule declared war on them. But then, in a show of solidarity, Goguryeo declared war on Thule, forcing all invasion plans to go out the window. Thus keeping the Ikko-Ikki safe for another day. Sure, they lost a city, but it's better to lose one than lose everything.
12: Rome
Msurdej:
Eheu! Rome continues to be torn apart by the Faroe Islands and Sierra Leone.They lost a third of their cities in this part, the Western part of the empire now lost to foreign invaders as Trajan tries to keep his empire alive. Still, kudos must go to Rome, as the Romans fight valiantly against two enemies for several parts, and still manage to hold the line. Something Mexico hadn't been able to do. And it'll be harder for Faroe Islands to get into the Mediterranean from here. It's still not looking good for Rome, but... not as bad as it could be.
13: Bavaria
ECH:
Bavaria rises a fair amount as… as… ummm…
I joke, as the principal reason is fairly clear, the sharp downfall of three civs above them added with a little regular rank churn. Still, this is another new height for Bavaria, second only to the 11th place they held for the first episode only. A real indication of how many fallen and runts there are by this point of the season.
14: Dzungars
Leman:
Dzungars played a decent enough game so far, but have now drifted into the “waiting to die” portion of the BR, as their rises are really only thanks to over civ’s falls. This week that included Bora Bora, Mexico, and Rome, for a rise of three sports. Good for Dzungars, I hope Selkups don’t decide to delete them next week.
15: Taino
NopeCopter:
The Taino rise three ranks, not because of anything they did (in fact they fumbled quite heavily by not taking action against Mexico while they still could), but because Rome, Bora-Bora, and ESPECIALLY Mexico all collapsed. Now, unfortunately, the Taino are still just as screwed as they were last episode, maybe even more so since they lost their best opportunity to consolidate the Caribbean, but they do TECHNICALLY still have an expansion opportunity or two if they act fast and attack either of the eastern USA civs. Even if they do, they’re still dead the moment the Yellowknives, New Holland, or even the Wahgi come knocking, but they’ll at least go out on a slightly higher note.
16: Thule
ECH:
The second highest range between PR rankings this episode, after Bora-Bora, went to Thule as we rankers went anywhere from 16th to 26th in placing them. Simply put, there is a fair amount of uncertainty in the air as to what this war with Goguryeo is going to end up looking like. It’s entirely possible Goguryeo drops out fast, they have some record of doing that in their wars against Shang early on. Adding to this, Thule isn’t some rump state, but a consistently decent power with plenty in the tank. However, the more common view, which I happen to share, is that this late-game era of war sees conquest pursued to the end; just look at Wahgi and Bora-Bora, who themselves like Thule were hardly a rump to begin with.
Goguryeo has major statistical and technological advantages, and with plenty of coastal cities, once Thule’s navy goes they have a lot of incredibly flippable land. Will it end there, or shall the Titan of Asia drag themselves inland to make this an elimination war? That is the question to ponder over the next episode.
17: Noongar
Nathanmasse:
Noongar rose four ranks this week and I’m not exactly sure why. Maybe it was just the decline of Thule, Mexico, and Bora-Bora but a win’s a win. They need every little bit they can get as their small and outdated military is unlikely to be doing much for them.
18: Saba-D’mt
Orange:
Saba go up a little bit, but they didn’t really do much. Sierra Leone’s push against Rome is setting Saba up as a nice snack soon. Or maybe Mog or Ndongo will make the move first, sure Saba fought Mog to a tie and the border with Ndongo is rough to go through, but how long can those things hold? Saba is falling behind, it’s a matter of time. But hey, they did climb in the rankings, so maybe things are only looking up.
19: Ume-Sami
Nathanmasse:
Not much good news for Ume-Sami this week. Their smallest neighbor was swallowed up by Latvia and now they’re pretty much boxed in between Faroe Islands and Latvia. Their techs are still pretty impressive and with both rocketry and nuclear fission they should start building nukes any turn now. Perhaps that will be enough to keep them in the game.
20: Mogadishu
Cloudy:
After the rollercoaster that was episode 36, Mogadishu has shown that they’re quick to regain the initiative, joining in a coalition against the Qarmatians and walking away with two cities in Arabia. Those cities have put Mogadishu in a much better position to recapture Hamar Weyne next time they go to war with Saba, too, which we all know is coming. All around, it seems like Mogadishu’s streak of good strategic decisions and surprise victories is continuing, and we’ve raised them to 15th in the hope that this pattern will continue in the near future.
21: Zheng
Leman:
It’s rough writing about Zheng because while they have good stats and have had good stats for a while, being squeezed between Wahgi and Goguryeo leaves them with zero real options to progress the game in a meaningful way. The plan for Zheng is to hope one of those two hyperpowers suffers some catastrophic collapse that Zheng can capitalize on or hope to finish the tech tree and make a spectacular comeback during total war. I wouldn’t put my money on the former as Goguryeo looks poised to crack open Thule and Bora-Bora finally collapses under Wahgi’s might. Nor would I put weight on the latter because Zheng’s broke. It’s a rough place to be, honestly.
22: Ndongo
NopeCopter:
Ndongo sits and watches for yet another episode as their neighbors all make big gains, seemingly content to just sit and enjoy their little slice of the world. Now, granted, being a moderately powerful African civilization is a pretty tried-and-true method for getting far in the CBR, but it’s also a notably awful method of actually WINNING - and besides, there’s no reset to give them a kick in the pants and an opportunity to turn things around. Ndongo is looking a bit more like Zaire than Lesotho right now, and that’s not at all a good sign.
23: Pontus
Nathanmasse:
For a while it seemed Pontus was content to sit idly as many of their likeliest invasion targets were gobbled up. Royal Hungary, Makhnovia, Kalmyks all disappeared without so much as a peep from Pontus. But Mithridates clearly vowed to never let it happen again. He played his cards right, allowing for the Qarmatians to commit the majority of their forces to fend off the other invaders before making his move and ended up with the lion’s share of Qarmatians’ land. And better yet, they were able to keep the Afsharids from gaining any ground. Now we can only hope they have a chance to rebuild and get these cities back online.
24: Palawa
Leman:
Quiet part for Palawa again as they sort of continue doing what they’ve always been doing: beefing their stats, glaring at Noongar, and hoping Wahgi doesn’t try to kill them. It’s not a winning strategy but it’s a strategy for a respectable placement I assume. They can just wait for Wahgi to flatline on science, catch up, and then make a move. Or they can just sit here. My bet is kind of on the latter.
25: Latvia
Nope:
Latvia maintains their spot in the top 10 off of a long-overdue elimination of the Finns, but make no mistake: top 10 isn’t what it used to be. While they’re not outright doomed, their stats are far, far behind the top players, and their historically large number of potential invasion targets has pretty much shrunk down to two. Honestly, I’m not sure if taking out Bavaria, Kazan, and even Ume Sami would give them enough power to stand on the same level as the Faroes, but hopefully they’ll at least be able to give them a good run for their money. And hey, they have been on a roll lately, so maybe we will see Big Latvia just a few episodes from now.
26: Singapore
Leman:
Singapore was one of several civs who participated in the partition of the Qarmatians, and only made it out of the war with a single city. However, that’s one more city than Afsharids, so a win’s a win. There was not much else going on in Singapore’s corner of the world. So, they hold steady at ninth.
27: Sierra Leone
Lasqueto:
What a great part for Thomas Peters! After initially shedding cities to Rome, this part he seems to have fully turned the tides, and has almost completely pushed them out of Africa (the Faroes pushing from the other flank probably helped). He’s even pushing right into Rome’s Mediterranean core. Pretty bad for Trajan, especially since he has better tech, though he’s also getting hit on two fronts so I can’t blame him that much. Overall, Sierra Leone definitely cemented themselves as the African top dog this part, but they still exist in the shadow of the Faroes, like everyone else in that corner of the cylinder.
28: Afsharids
Leman:
Honestly, this part was an embarrassment for Afsharids, mostly because of how they got absolutely shut out of the partition of the Qarmatians by Pontus. They definitely tried but Pontus sniped the city that Afsharids had spent a turn or two bombarding. Then the closed borders between the two prevented Afsharids from really getting anymore involved. Qarmatians collapsed so fast that I guess an ambitious attack for a land power was a bit late. They spent the rest of the episode being bombed by Selkups.
29: Selkups
Lasqueto:
After losing their holdings in the Caucasus, The Selkups have gone in for round 2 against the Afsharids. They seem to have gone for the “Oops, all bombers” strat, which can sometimes work, I’ll grant you. This is only slightly undercut by the fact the Selkups don’t directly border them and as such can’t actually get units through. Vonya. My guy. Build some paratroopers! A look at their core gives us more cause for concern. The Selkups are conspicuously uncarpeted. A lot of their troops seem to be piled up against the southern border trying to get at the Afsharids, but they still have like ¼ the manpower of Goguryeo. If Gwanggaeto attacks, and I’m sure he will sooner or later, Vonya’s gonna be in trouble.
30: New Holland
ECH:
8th, 7th, 6th and now 5th place for New Holland, a steady gradual rise anyone would be satisfied with, and perhaps a sign of their imminent victory in four more episodes?! Well, no, probably not that far, but the clear winner of the South American Continental Bowl should be underestimated at your own peril. They’ve walked out of the war with Mexico with the larger slice of the pie compared to Yellowknives and with less flip damage, albeit this land already held the scars of conquest by Mexico from Ecuador. Indeed, there’s been a pretty visible and respectable stats rise in multiple fields for Maurits this week, most notably a 45% rise in production and a 108% rise in milscore (albeit that likely rests more in adopting some cutting edge unit tech, rivalling the likes of the Faroes in mechanised combat units). How aren’t they higher than 5th? Well, ultimately these gains have more caught them up to near where the other top tiers are, moreso than beating any of them. One could make a decent case for them now being on par with Yellowknives, even beating them in tech matters, but they’re still a ways to go from matching any of the top 3. Still, they now have a grand opportunity to rebuild their new lands and explode in these passive stats, which will translate into active stats in time.
31: Yellowknives
ECH:
In contrast to the 5th place rising star, always just on the cusp of entering podium position, Yellowknives spends another PR in 4th position. There’s a case to be made that behind the jubilation of grabbing a new capital for their collection, this last episode was more of a mixed bag for the North American power than anything. On one hand, they got the valuable Mexican core and other North American land holdings off of Maximillian. However, the war was frustratingly back-and-forth, demolishing the population of these new lands; whilst as just mentioned in the last rank, the bigger share of spoils got handed to their war ‘ally’ New Holland, who also happens to be growing their stats with greater momentum. In fact, where NH grew their production by 45% last episode, Yellowknives only grew 1% in that realm. Even worse, the Yellowknives milscore actually shrank 18% in light of so many flips! Of course, the counterpoint here is that Akaitcho is hardly bereft of easy options, as Osage, Seneca and a beleaguered Thule sit there for the taking… for now…
32: Faroes
Lasqueto:
God these guys are lame. On paper they had this war in the bag. They’ve got top of the range tech - battlesuits, rocket artillery, the works basically. They should’ve been strolling into Cairo right now, or at the very least Rome. But did they? Did they hell. By the end of the part they were barely able to keep control of Carthago, largely because Trondur seems to be forgetting to bring units. And a lot of the units on the front line seem to be antiquated ones like great war infantry. Even Rome can do better than that. Shockingly pathetic. I get that launching an invasion into Italy via sea is hard, but come on. They’ll win with time, of course, but still. If Wahgi are the Ramsey Bolton of this season, Faroes are certainly the Joffrey - sniveling, incompetent and well, we’ll just have to hope Olenna Tyrell offers them a drink.
33: Wahgi
Orange:
Why am I the one who was assigned the Wahgi slide? What cruel fate does the world have for me to give me the role of doing the slide for the enemy of the cylinder, the destroyer of my love. Wahgi this part struggled to break onto the mainland for 80% of the part and then did a zerg rush at the end, but not just of Bora but of Mexico too. That shit was devious. The Wahgi are stumbling into the role of the absolute villain of the season, and it feels like we’re now all just waiting for who the hero to take them down will be.
34: Goguryeo
NopeCopter:
Goguryeo holds onto the top spot despite being statistically significantly below the Big Two just by sheer virtue of playing the game properly. Despite the gargantuan Production score of the Faroes and the utterly unfathomable military might of the Wahgi, they’re both paying dearly for their over-militarized empires and are on the verge of going into deep, deep debt - and considering they’re already both only on par with Goguryeo in tech, this could easily lead to a decline or even outright collapse. On the other hand, Goguryeo has been slowly and steadily building up an almost-as-strong empire from proper foundations, leading to a very well-rounded and healthy position with a solid GPT. Better yet, Goguryeo is conquering at a very sustainable and effective pace, fighting effective wars while never resting on their laurels for too long - the war with Thule might be trickier than their last few bouts, but if they can inflict a defeat on Thule equivalent to Faroes v England, Waghi v Bora-Bora, or Yellowknives/New Holland v Mexico, then they’re set. Obviously Goguryeo’s hold on the top spot is tenuous, but provided no major shake-ups occur, they at least look set to remain strong for a long time to come.
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