Power Rankings: Episode 11 – S5

April 09, 2026

Power-Rankers

Abstract

Power Rankings! The rankings…of power! Dun dun dunnnn!

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Ryukyu
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CBR In-Game Screenshot of Ryukyu

1: Ryukyu

NopeCopter:

There is something sacred about the first elimination of a season, the 61st placer. Their destruction signals, in a way, the start of the game, an often quiet and yet seismic shift in the state of the game from a complete roster to something no longer whole. The first piece torn out of a picture soon to be ripped to shreds. There are so many forms, too, that this first elimination can take, so many of which can feel… cruel, unfair. From the likes of Xia and Assyria, cut down before they ever even had a chance, to Rome, a perfectly decent civ which was simply beaten down relentlessly. The 61st placement is sacred, in a way, just as exclusive as the 1st place ranking and just as impactful. But they are rarely looked upon fondly. They are looked on with pity, with sadness. With “what could have been”. This is to be expected - they, by definition, did poorly. But the funny thing about the CBR is that even the worst of the worst can be looked upon fondly, because there is more to existence than success here.

The status of a “legendary” civ is a funny thing with regards to the CBR, because it’s so thoroughly divorced from what makes a civ successful, and yet it’s perhaps even more difficult to achieve that status than it is to win the entire game. It brings into question what a “good” civ even truly is - is it the civs that were strong? Or the civs you remember? Is the ultimate success of a civ to be powerful, or to be entertaining? To be both is the ideal, of course, but which takes precedence? The path to being a successful civ is obvious - there are many routes to take, but they all have similar ingredients and ultimately convene at the same result. Good stats, good initiative, good momentum, working around the geography and neighbors. The process of being a “strong civ” is built and maintained over eons. On the other hand, the process of becoming a “legendary civ” is often a matter of moments. It is spontaneous, it is divorced from and in some cases antithetical to success, and it is by its very nature unexpected. There are many legendary civs which were successful, of course, but just as many were the least interesting civs in the game until one moment, one decision, changed everything. So, then… what would it take for the 61st-placed civ to become a legend? To rise beyond even the stigma of last place and become something beloved, something iconic, despite having the worst record and the least time to make a miracle happen? Is it even possible to achieve such a thing without self-sabotage? Well, I suppose we have our answer to that question now, thanks to none other than Ryukyu.

Ryukyu’s entire existence was defined by chaotic ups and downs, of hope and despair, of denying supposed inevitability to create a new reality and then denying that too. From the very beginning, Ryukyu was not set up for success. Filling a slot most often given to a mainland civilization, Ryukyu was instead set to begin on a small island off the coast, disconnecting their core from their capital and potentially surrendering swaths of land to their other South Chinese rival, to say nothing of their naval vulnerability. Almost poetically, they found themselves stuck between China and Japan, just as they did historically. But the voters did not care. This was the point. This was a nation known for the impossible - for the infamously difficult EU4 achievement which required the player to lead them to world conquest. This was a civilization which had been waiting for an updated mod for a decade, and was finally getting a chance to prove themselves on the grandest stage of all. When they were voted in, some reacted with dread, lamenting the imbalance they represented. Others celebrated, seeing the potential for an underdog run. But none believed in Ryukyu.

Then, something changed. Among the Power Rankers, whispers began to circulate, spreading news nobody expected to hear: success for the Ryukyu. Two incredibly strong test runs in a row. Strong settles on the Chinese coast, and even Korea, translating into eventual conquest of Japan and dominance of the coast. It seemed impossible. It seemed to defy all logic. But the reality was undeniable. Ryukyu could not only succeed but even thrive. Immediately the PRs began to sing a new tune, one that saw Ryukyu as a dark horse, a secret powerhouse that defied all notions of what an island civ in a land-dominated region “should” be. It was exciting. And with further buffs to improve island civs’ settling AI, that excitement seemed ready to blossom further.

However, as the tests continued, a new reality began to set in. Failure after failure. Where had that scrappy, expansive Ryukyu gone? It was hard to say. They had perhaps one more run resembling a success, but that was it. To some PRs, this was enough to cull all those feelings of hope that once abounded. Still, some refused to see this reality, clinging to first impressions. Ryukyu was still a dark horse, a potential power. And with this split, Ryukyu was placed in a controversial 55th place in the initial Power Rankings. They were spoken as if they were trapped between major powers, unlikely to amount to anything, but also as though they had that spark, that glimmer of hope. Like the power which led to those early test runs still laid dormant inside them, ready to burst out if given the opportunity.

And, as bottom-tier civs often do, Ryukyu seemed to let that latent power, that underdog spice, flow instantly into their every action, as if compelled by a higher power to make the PRs look like fools. Ryukyu came out of the gate swinging, playing every card right, placing not one but two cities on the mainland in the first episode alone. Yunnan, meanwhile, was slow - they did not settle. Cebu was even slower. Japan settled southward, but their cities were all vulnerable by sea. Instantly, Ryukyu rocketed up the PRs, into the top half. For some other civ, perhaps this would have seemed premature. But the PRs had seen what Ryukyu could do. They knew the potential Ryukyu held, if they could just get off to a strong start. They were ranked low because their course was so uncertain, but once they had chosen their course, the trajectory could only lead to success.

…Or, that’s what we believed. But there was one other factor that nobody considered: the potential that Ryukyu wasn’t the only civ overperforming. As Ryukyu stagnated and rested on their laurels, Tang sprung into action with a series of bold settles, crushing any dreams of Ryukyu expanding further inland while simultaneously strangling Yunnan in their bed. Ryukyu would not be a Chinese civ this time. But this was okay. Their destiny always laid on the sea. And fortunately for Ryukyu, opportunity abounded in the south. As Yunnan underperformed, Cebu and Pegu performed exactly as expected: which is to say, not at all. Even Lanfang seemed disinterested in the likes of eastern Borneo, leaving massive swaths of Southeast Asia open to the enterprising Ryukyu. It was silly, sure. It was much worse than just strengthening their hold on the mainland. But it provided a route into a full region of vulnerable targets.

Ryukyu’s opportunism wasn’t limited to their settlement, however. Above them, Japan has been expanding rapidly, cutting Ryukyu off from any northward settlements. But that meant that all of these cities - constructed instead of a navy - were island cities hopelessly exposed to a naval assault. And Ryukyu had a navy. So as Japan rushed to colonize Korea, they struck. Their Triremes surrounded and battered Momoyama. Taking even one city in this war would cripple their northern rival and put them on the first step to conquering Japan as they had in those first test runs, to put Ryukyu on the path toward dominance over the northwest Pacific. They had done it before, after all. They could do it again.

Unfortunately, by their very nature, risky plays are risky. Putting it all on the line is rarely a choice made with 100% safety. Sometimes bold, aggressive plays fail. And here, Ryukyu’s dice rolled snake eyes. Granted, this was largely their own fault for playing far more boldly than they needed to. Their fleet was beaten down by the waves of Momoyama, the siege broken by a Japanese navy that mobilized faster than expected, but the war was a desperate and unnecessary play anyways. Instead of a safe and useful mainland settlement in Vietnam, Ryukyu instead went immediately for the riskiest possible option and settled Borneo, angering Lanfang and making their critical fourth city needlessly difficult to reinforce. Ryukyu’s rank tumbled. Ten ranks after being blocked out of China, and another ten after wasting their navy and their Settler.

From here, the consequences of Ryukyu’s actions reared their ugly heads immediately. Yunnan and Cebu, despite their sleepiness, finally found the time to claim the eastern coast of Indochina, locking Ryukyu out of their next-best base of operations. Lanfang punished Ryukyu’s insolence by quickly and effortlessly capturing their forward-settle of Tomari. To Ryukyu’s credit, they refused to give up at this point. But whether it was a panicked attempt to salvage their position, thrill-seeking, or delusions of grandeur, they just could not resign themselves to a safe play. Instead, they built another Settler… and once again sent it to Borneo. The settlement of Nakijin was perhaps a belated attempt to reinforce their second core, or perhaps it was a signal that they had given up and had decided to just have fun with the rest of their existence. Whatever the case, it was also a clear sign to the PRs that Ryukyu was well and truly out of the game. They had given up. Their stats were in the gutter. Of course, in theory they weren’t COMPLETELY out of it - they still had two utterly pathetic neighbors in Yunnan and Cebu - but that didn’t matter, because they hadn’t actually made peace with Lanfang, either. In fact, Lanfang wasn’t even their most existentially threatening opponent. The almighty Tang, who had just brought both Rouran and Yunnan to heel, also tired of Ryukyu’s shenanigans. And thus, Ryukyu was to be crushed.

But the coalition war against Ryukyu was strange. In fact, it almost felt like a mockery of Ryukyu’s dreams and aspirations, what they wanted to be. Because Ryukyu actually did succeed at fending off Tang and Lanfang, at least at first. But then Ryukyu’s arrogance truly came back to bite them. First, Japan joined the war. Ryukyu, whose navy still had not recovered from their reckless attack against that very same civ, found themselves the victims of their own aggression. And yet somehow this was not the most impactful or even the most karmic moment of Ryukyu’s downfall. For in their hubris, Ryukyu had forward-settled Lanfang, yes - but more importantly, they had NOT forward-settled Cebu, the slow-going, despondent Filipino civ. Cebu had left their entire potential core open to grab, but rather than take the opportunity to cripple their neighbor for good and position themselves to conquer this bottom-feeder, Ryukyu bypassed them entirely, because they were the dark horse underdog, and they were too good for Cebu. After all, this was Cebu, the civ which had not built a single Settler in over a hundred turns. They could always come back to grab the rest of their unused land later. And it was this very ignorance, this desire to be the cool dark horse underdog, which provided the opportunity for a REAL dark horse underdog to rise. Because suddenly, in the midst of the coalition war that Ryukyu was barely holding out against, Cebu awoke. And they mobilized the navy that had been scattered across their oceans. And in the span of five turns, they not only took Nakijin, but also Ryukyu’s very own capital of Shuri. Ryukyu was cut down by the very image of what they could have been.

In an ordinary world, perhaps even a just world, this would be exactly where Ryukyu’s story would end - a civ which rolled the dice for no reason and lost, a civ which in their attempts to rocket above their station only handed that same opportunity to another. And as their final cities, those coastal Chinese cities which gave the PRs so much hope, were besieged by the Tang, that seemed to be their legacy. As their final city fell, Ryukyu was set to be a tragic tale, a classic example of a 61st-place civ - a dream cut short, a valiant effort ultimately reduced to nothing by the crushing arm of reality, to be remembered as nothing other than another coalition victim.

But the process by which a civ becomes legendary occurs in moments, not eons, and the hand of destiny strikes whoever and whenever it pleases. And so, by the efforts and dreams of the very last Ryukyu Spearman, Nanzan was flipped one last time, one last show of defiance and spirit before exiting the stage of the CBR. Not an uncommon gesture, but always a respectable one.

And then Tang made peace.

In one moment, Ryukyu has remade their destiny, their legacy. They had become the very first civ in CBR history to meaningfully un-eliminate themselves, clutching life from the jaws of death. In a way, it was meaningless - they were still a city-state trapped for eternity with nothing else to do. But legends are made in moments. And in that moment, nothing else Ryukyu had done or could do mattered. They had stopped being a civ and became a story, an icon. A legend.

Well, this legend was admittedly somewhat dampened by the fact that it ultimately did not truly matter. A few episodes later, Cebu once again declared war, and this invited Tang to return and finish the job. Ryukyu still placed 61st. Their miraculous revival did not change their fate or even improve their ranking. But Laos’s self-immolation did not prolong their life. The Afsharids ultimately fell all the same even when they clawed their way back from a single city’s liberation to control over India. Ryukyu’s rank would have been the same whether or not that one Spearman had made that one fateful move, and Nanzan would be Tang either way. But what WOULD have changed is the spirits of the cylinder, the words spoken between observers, the jokes, the emotions, the excitement. Ryukyu’s rising from the grave changed nothing, and yet it changed everything. It was something we had never seen before, and will likely never see again. It was a forgettable blip on the radar in terms of data, but it was an unforgettable MOMENT. It was not only the ultimate demonstration of the difference between a “strong” and a “good” civ, but also the ultimate demonstration of the value of the human in the CBR, of the observer, of the little moments that make people smile even as the cylinder marches toward homogeneity. It is the perfect encapsulation of what makes the CBR special, and it has made Ryukyu into something not only unforgettable but beloved. And they’re the LAST PLACER of this season. So thank you, Ryukyu. Your legacy may not be what you were promised, but it is positive all the same. You did not conquer the world, but you conquered our hearts and reminded us all of what truly matters. F.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Pegu

2: Pegu

Semi:

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PEGU WEEKLY REPORT

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Pegu Cities: No new cities. The empire has always controlled the large lands around the great capital of Dagon (which has always been the capital, and any suggestions to the contrary are anti-Pegu propaganda), with no need for other major cities and administration.

Pegu Statistics: There is no rank change this week, for it is not required. As everyone knows, having the highest living rank number is a very good thing and high numbers mean you’re winning, with low stats numbers signaling how close you are to perfection.

Pegu Settlers: The empire has no need for settlers, with the Wandering Settler being sold to the Lanfang Company for its insolence in daring to settle a new city other than the great Dagon.

Pegu Neighbors: Pegu has joined their righteous neighbor Bangladesh in a war against the evil civ known as Green Ukraine. No other neighbor information is relevant.

Pegu Wars: [REDACTED DUE TO BEING ANTI-PEGU PROPAGANDA]

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END OF PEGU WEEKLY REPORT

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CBR In-Game Screenshot of Rapa Nui

3: Rapa Nui

Msurdej:  

Rapa Nui continues to exist. That is all.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Ma’in

4: Ma’in

Shaggy:

It’s Ma’in. They have 2 cities. What else is new?

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Karankawa

5: Karankawa

Semi:

These guys settled a brand new city in Labrador this week. Susquehannock then captured that city. But hey, at least they haven’t lost the rest of their northern Newfoundland colony! (Yet)

Karankawa’s still dreadfully exposed though, with two cities on the Gulf Coast, one in the Yucatan, and two in Newfoundland. Not exactly the kind of empire you’re looking for when you want long term survival odds. So a little rank drop is only appropriate.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Sumer

6: Sumer

Archimedes :

Sumer had a decidedly uneventful episode, making peace with Pakistan and gifting away one of their cities, leaving them at a paltry 3 city count. Their chances in this game are dwindling by the minute, with poor stats reflecting their poor opportunities. Sumer never really had a grand chance in this game, as their interesting abilities and well known historical relevancy hampered by their mediocre starting position and atrocious AI. But can Sumer manage to have any regional relevancy in this game? Or will they be food for one of the emerging green powers that have already nibbled at their borders.

Sumer has at least managed to hold onto a decent looking production with its few cities, as Lagash is sitting at a pretty 23 population. That population has tried to keep Sumer in the running for technological competency, but losing out on cities has driven their effective science into the ground. With a matching poor production output, and a standing army that leaves much to be desired, Sumer really needs to try to push out and capture anything else from anyone on their level. Hyksos at one point could have been a target, but have since militarized their holdings into a defendable bulwark. And, unfortunately for Sumer, both Ma’in and Phoenicia boast defensive terrain that would make any invasion impractical. Sumer looks absolutely trapped, walled in on all sides by powerful enemies or defensive rump states.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Maravi

7: Maravi

Orange:

Begging Herero and Seychelles to take Maravi out of their misery, BEGGING. Also they yet again have a settler hanging around north of their capital not settling because why would they do that that would require them to be a competent civ.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Wassoulou

8: Wassoulou

NopeCopter:

Wassoulou has found themselves in a rather peculiar fate, a status that only a rare few civs get to achieve: that of the Cool Rump State. Despite their best efforts, Wassoulou has been thoroughly shut down and split up by Aures, and then crushed underneath their heels before they could build up any sort of resistance. They even faced down a coalition war, albeit not a particularly relevant one. And yet… Wassoulou held out. Not enough to salvage any chances of victory or even relevance, but enough to be fun to root for in their war against the Aures. What should have been a free meal to cement the Aures’ place on top of the rankings instead turned into a meat grinder that the Aures abandoned without even a single city gift. Wassoulou only barely managed this - even Portugal is still threatening to take a city - but Wassoulou put up a fight, and that sure is something.

Now, make no mistake: Wassoulou is basically a collection of five cities that the Aures are saving for a rainy day. They have no chance of redemption or future relevance whatsoever, and odds are they’ll stick around for far longer than they’re welcome from here on out. Their stats are abysmal and they effectively have one neighbor. However, for this one brief moment, Wassoulou was cool. And maybe that’s enough.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Xaragua

9: Xaragua

Archimedes :

Looking at the stats, Xaragua has taken a bit of a tumble down the infoaddict ranking this episode. And even in the power rankings, they’ve dropped from 46 to 53. It’s a bit perplexing, as they still have 4 cities in the Caribbean, they built a collection of wonders this episode, and they’re working on researching Compass. Is there a specific reason as to why they’ve dropped quite so low?

Ah.

They gave away a 16 pop city to Teotihuacan for free.

It seems like Xaragua doesn’t fully grasp that they’re in a battle royale. Settling only four cities, focusing on tourism and population growth, giving away large cities to avoid conflict, Xaragua has all of the markings of a 4 city Tradition opener, rushing for a cultural win. Their population and crop yield,as well as effective science and researched technologies, is in a very good standing, but every other relevant statistic for a battle royale is abysmal. With only 61 production in their empire, it’s an absolute marvel that they were able to grab two wonders this episode, with neighbouring Teotihuacan managing none throughout this entire game. The wonders themselves are of little relevance as well; two religious wonders for a civilization that never managed to found their own religion.

Xaragua at least is managing its science well. Though they’ve been researching it for over 10 turns, they are on the cusp of learning Compass, and will be the first civilization to do so. Though they are no longer at war with Teotihuacan, having some of the first Galleasses on the cylinder will be a big boon to their defensive strength, and may allow them to defend themselves against further incursions from Teotihuacan, or perhaps take their city back or conquer some of the new Yanomami settlements. The likelihood of them actually doing so is quite low, considering their previous performance, but for any Xaragua fans in the audience the hope still at leasts exists. The likeliest outcome, unfortunately, is some other civilization will sweep through their islands and gain a significant presence in the Caribbean. Whichever civilization does so, whether it’s Teotihuacan, Yanomami or Susquehannock, can be assured that these islands will be a popular tourist destination for them, boasting splendid wonders, lush beaches, and large scientifically focused cities.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Ponca

10: Ponca

Reformer:

Fuckin’, yeah, Ponca’s honestly just vibing while the continent burns down around them. Great place to watch, and plenty of fire to pop some popcorn!

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Wallachia

11: Wallachia

NopeCopter:

The day of reckoning has arrived for Wallachia. For most of the game at this point, they have been a large but ultimately doomed civ only held even remotely afloat by the very thing that was destroying them: their gigantic military. But that military has grown outdated, and now, invaders are striking at their outskirts. Hansa and Circassia are not in position to really threaten Wallachia, but in the long term they’re both much stronger. Worse yet, the coalition is still growing - there’s no telling whether the true demon, Scythia, will strike as well.

If Wallachia can hold off their foes, there’s a chance their military will be cut down enough to let them start making money again. However, even then, it’s probably far too late. Wallachia has fewer techs than any other civ on the cylinder, and every other stat of theirs is thoroughly mediocre. Even their formerly-impressive city count is no longer anything to write home about. The most important question to ask regarding Wallachia is no longer whether they can recover, but how long they can stick around, and this war is likely to provide that answer.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Yunnan

12: Yunnan

JDT:

They do lots of things. Including being awful. Actually scratch that, they do exactly one thing, and that's being awful.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Ternate

13: Ternate

Msurdej:  

Continuing to claw their way out of the gutter Bunuba put them in, the Ternate rise to their second highest rank all game. Still proving to the world that he's got that dawg in him, Babullah took back Dodinga and held his other cities from naval assaults.Their stats continue to grow at a steady rate, most notable their military, which nearly doubled in the last epsiode.

But Ternate gets a new clear distinction in this episode. With Ryukyu dead (and barring some insane strokes of luck), Ternate is the first civ to beat their Episode 0 predictions. Sure they were voted last place, but even if they were defeated in the next episode, they'd still do better than what we expected of them. But it remains to be seen if the Ternate can use their gains to keep growing. A naval assault onto Australia is all but doomed to fail, and other islands would be hard to take. It's a hard road forward, but Ternate seems determined to walk it.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Xavante

14: Xavante

Archimedes :

For a civilization with only 4 cities, Xavante looks… alright I guess? They have population and they have some stats, but overall their prospects look iffy at best. With highly militarized neighbours on all sides, and one of the strongest South America’s we’ve potentially ever seen, Xavante is living up to the initial predictions as likely the first elimination in the region.

Despite only having four cities, Xavante has done an admiral job of defending themselves in recent conflicts. Their carpet of Composite Bowmen is intimidating, and their existing cities sit at 10 or higher population, with combat strength solidly in the 20s. Their effective science has helped them generally keep pace tech wise, but is slowly but surely beginning to drop off. And while they do have good production and food per capita stats, it’s starting to become apparent that they’re being outclassed by nearby civs with double or triple the total city count. Xavante are now officially landlocked, and South America is essentially bereft of new settling locations, so the only route to expansion is through conquest, which has already been a stumbling block in the past. Outside of some open borders or sneaking a settler through during a war, Xavante looks to be locked into what they currently have, and will only find improvement from pumping their current cities with newer, more improved buildings.

Xavante unfortunately doesn’t have much in the way of unique abilities to help them either. Their main focus is on generating great musicians based on outside tourism pressure, something they’ve really excelled at so far. Otherwise, their unique scout may have given them one plantation resource north of Abelhinha, and their Hospital replacement is far into the future. Their location advantage of thick, hard to navigate jungle has been all but completely clear cut, leaving themselves more open for a sweeping invasion from any of their neighbours. Unfortunately for them, Xavante seems almost wide open to be eliminated this game. While they’ve stuck around for longer than anticipated, and still will for the near future, Xavante seem relegated to be the target for any up and coming empire in the area. Whether that ends up being Caral, Chono, Guaycuru, Potiguara or Yanomami is the only question.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Papal States

15: Papal States

Reformer:

Ahhhh shit. Ahhhhhhh fuck. It’s all going down the drain. Spiralling. Goddammit! The cheesemakers must not be blessed after all! Aures is fucking up the Papal periphery, which is the nice way to put it. (Oh yeah, and France is also doing some inconsequential raiding runs across the Alps.) Ruling such a small civ, the Pope can’t exactly afford any of this city flipping. The situation is bad enough that if the Pope wasn’t out of the running before, this is definitely the final nail in the coffin. Squeezed tight with no hope of expansion, it seems the battlepope is most similar to Mk.2 Rome . . .

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Kipchaks

16: Kipchaks

Shaggy:

It is definitely hard to be the Kipchaks right about now. It seems like everyone hates them even though they keep lending units to every civ with 2 gold coins to rub together. But credit where credit is due, they are holding up surprisingly well in the face of much larger, more competent opponents, at least for now. They’ve sued for peace with Ket without losing a single core city and they’ve set up their units strategically around the Ural passes to pick off Vyatkan units. With Bactria looking further south, the Kipchaks have earned themselves some much-needed breathing room. Mediocrity is inevitable, but let them have a little fun on the way there.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Vyatka

17: Vyatka

Msurdej:  

Well folks, when it rains, it pours. What started as a well meaning attempt to bully the weaker Kipchaks turned into a real slobberknocker for Vyatka as the Ket and Scythia (and Green Ukraine, but they're irrelevant) tag team. Scythia has a massive army right near the capital, and should it march on Khlynov, it could doom the civ. I mean, they've lost cities, armies, population, gold, and barely eked out growth in production and tech. If this death spiral continues, it could spell the end for Ioann.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Phoenicia

18: Phoenicia

Reformer:

Okay, well, potentially good news is, Phoenicia is part of the anti-Wallachia coalition, and with some intense luck, might just about snipe a Wallachian city. The potentially bad news, however, is that Bactria, Ma’in, and Pope are all still at war with Phoenicia. HOWEVER. It must also be noted that Bactria is trying to take a city with embarked units, Ma’in is Ma’in, and Pope is getting eviscerated by Aures. So, you know. It’s kinda like Phoenicia’s only at war with Wallachia! Totally.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Portugal

19: Portugal

ItsTruckMonth:

Portugal has proven this episode that yes, you CAN be lazy even in warfare, as their attempts in the Wassoulou coalition have borne little fruit: essentially just flipping the former Aures city of Ad Medias.

I mean, let’s be honest: Portugal’s out of it by this point. Just let them do their sidequests, regardless of how lazy their attempts are.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Estonia

20: Estonia

Shaggy:

Estonia continues to benefit from northern Europe just being a frozen wasteland of stagnation. And by “benefit” I mean they haven’t been eaten by a neighbor yet. But that will only last as long as Scythia has more appetizing prospects. Once Vyatka has been properly shredded, I expect Estonia to be solidly in the crosshairs of their better-performing neighbors. Lennart Meri will enjoy his throne until then at least.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Zazzau

21: Zazzau

Orange:

Zazzau slowly is climbing back after their disaster of a start. They missed out on settling that one bit to their east but at least they have an army and are at least trying to get back into things. Maybe they can join back against Aures while they are distracted by two other fronts?

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Bjarmians

22: Bjarmians

Reformer:

We’re still fighting Estonia and getting nothing out of it. In the meantime, Kalmar is getting beat up by Scotland, Vyatka is getting eaten alive by Scythia, and even Hansa is about to take a city from…oh, yeah, Estonia. Because Estonia is putting all their eggs in the anti-Bjarmia basket. Really, it’s a big ol’ shame. I was lowkey looking forward to this civ, but they’ve gotten nothing done. Well, there was that one Vyatka city, but clearly that civ is as stable as a house of cards, so eh.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Bactria

23: Bactria

NopeCopter:

I’ve always been a believer in Bactria, maybe too much so, and to my credit, they seemed to be on the way up at the start of last episode. The Kipchaks looked to be on their way to being rumped, and Bactria had taken the initiative to attack Phoenicia’s two isolated, undefended cities, which would have given them a solid hold in Persia. Unfortunately, however, their upward trajectory seems to have been firmly grounded now. The invasion of Phoenicia has been a resounding failure, with the terrain proving too difficult to maneuver around. Meanwhile, the Kipchaks have turned out to be much more stubborn than expected, resisting multiple invasions and maintaining a small but respectable core. All the while, Pakistan is growing more and more powerful, and Qara Khitai has become an insurmountable wall. Their stats continue to tumble, too, placing them only slightly above the Kipchaks of all civs. Bactria has gone from a solid underdog with a lot of potential to a thoroughly walled-in, all because they just couldn’t keep that momentum going. I hesitate to completely write them off even now, but it may be time to stop being a believer.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Guaycuru

24: Guaycuru

Reformer:

Whaddya want me to say? Ain’t shit happening in Guaycuru land until Chono kills ‘em. Or Potiguara, I guess. Really, the whole continent seems a bit inept. At least Caral can science turtle, whatever that’s worth.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Itelmen

25: Itelmen

Cloudy:

Well, that could have gone a lot worse.

Itelmen ended their war with Green Ukraine this episode with a net loss of only one city, even though Green Ukraine had captured two and was threatening a third. Some of this mitigated outcome has to be put down to Japan bursting through the wall like the Kool Aid man, rescuing Itelmen by happenstance. But I do think Itelmen did a good job flipping and defending their city on Honshu, so credit where credit is due.

Overall, this was a better outcome than we were expecting, so they regain five of the seven ranks that they lost last week.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Hyksos

26: Hyksos

JDT:

Hyksos sees a 4 point jump in the face of several critical developments. The primary one is their gigantic surge up the stats sheet. Going up by +4 this episode and slowly creeping up the stat sheets over the past few episodes, they now have very solid stats in every critical field aside from production, including a very sizable carpet to ward off attackers. Furthermore, their biggest primary threat in Ethiopia has proven themselves to be completely inept in warring, failing to take an undefended city from Phoenicia despite ample time and forces, and the next largest test in Aures are currently depleted after chain warring Zazzau into Wassalou into the Papacy.

Heres one thing to consider though. In sports, there is such a thing as an eye test, where the statistical impact of a player may not align to how they actually perform on the field. A statistically good player may actually not be super impactful or useful in major play due to intangibles, mentality, fatigue or other factors that are difficult to quantify. Vice versa, a person who may not look great on the stat sheet might look legit on the court and have whats needed to be a key contributor.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Luba

27: Luba

Reformer:

Luba check: Yep, still in there. Luba line check: Yep, still very line-esque. That’s nice.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Hanseatic League

28: Hanseatic League

Semi:

Here we go again.

“You awake in there, Jurgen? A whole lot of nothing this week for the Hanseatic League as Europe continues erupting around them. And in all honesty, that’s probably not a good thing. They have failed to take advantage of any of the opportunities around them - stabbing France in the back while they’re distracted ̶i̶n̶ ̶P̶o̶r̶t̶u̶g̶a̶l̶ in the Papacy, going after a weakened Kalmar again with Bjarmia, or going after a Wallachia who thinks the most advanced weapon any human can create is a long stick. And it’s not like they’re simming and turtling either - their military is subpar, their science is fine but not spectacular (it’s below Estonia, but at least above Kalmar), and their production is pretty bad. Maybe this newfound Scythian Bergen gives them an opportunity to connect up Rakvere and break the Kalmar Union in a future war. But who am I kidding, Jurgen doesn’t play the game, the game plays him. Welcome to Bavaria 2.0 everyone: Northern Germany Edition.”

Wait, I’m being told that my evergreen writeup is actually outdated? I don’t believe it. Jurgen Wullenwever actually *declared war* - and on Wallachia of all people! Progress!

(We’ll see if it actually goes anywhere though. I have my doubts, given that Wallachia actually has non-single-digit science output)

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Green Ukraine

29: Green Ukraine

Cloudy:

Green Ukraine was given a severe reality check this episode as their war with Itelmen stagnated and Japan invaded from multiple directions, provoking the most serious crisis Yurii Hlushko has faced so far. Svobodnyy has fallen to Japan already, expelling Green Ukraine from Korea, and with a few more turns for Hideyoshi to rebuild his forces, more cities could follow. Hlushko only barely held Nikolaevsk-Ussirisky by the thinnest of margins. No other cities are imminently threatened but there’s definitely a sense that Japan could go farther given enough time.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Cebu

30: Cebu

Reformer:

Cebu takes a day off work this ep. Weeeeell. Technically, they are part of the anti-Pomo coalition, and technically, they could reach Pomo Hawaii and be a pest. I find it unlikely, though. Instead, Cebu should just continue heading towards Compass tech for better ships, and then wreak havoc again. Although, weak targets are starting to be limited…

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Kalmar Union

31: Kalmar Union

Archimedes :

The Kalmar Union is in a bit of hot water right now, looking at recent events. After settling a collection of North Sea settlements in decent, area controlling spots, they have found themselves at blows with the absolute rising star that is Scotland. And, with one city already captured and a second at the precipice, it looks like Kalmar will be ending this war by losing out on at least a few cities.

Kalmar has at least maintained some average stats throughout the recent troubles they’re going through. Average production and food, and still a decent number of cities, means that Kalmar is still maintaining a solid hold on Scandinavia, even though their science is beginning to slip. They have finally managed to research writing, so we may be seeing raw science numbers that are pre having libraries in all of their cities, but there’s a chance that some of their more established cities could already be portraying Library science numbers. Some far northern cities in the frozen arctic are looking, well, not so useful at the moment, nestled in beside fellow Scottish cities. With these cities potentially dragging the civs down with overblown science and culture costs, the Kalmar Union may even be better off shedding these cities to Scotland to help their empire blossom more.

Scotland, however, is a huge threat to Kalmar at the moment. With a collection of cities on the West of Scandinavia now vulnerable, Kalmar could be seeing even more losses than just their two island cities. Gothenburg is an apparent next target, and Malmo, Aarhus, and even Oslo look potentially vulnerable to a naval assault. The Kalmar Union have at least managed to nab their unique unit, a Galleass replacement unlocked earlier at Guilds, but with -2 combat strength they may not weather the storm of a full carpet of Triremes that well. Scotland is at least a bit away from grabbing Galleasses of their own, so if Kalmar Union can build up a great enough mass of Gun Holks to defend their seas, they may come out of this war with only a couple lost cities.

Will Kalmar Union be able to defend themselves from the onslaught of the Scottish Empire? Or will they make some more questionable diplomatic moves and give away an extra city or two? Kalmar still has the chance to make waves in Europe, especially if focusing on their eastern and southern neighbours, but this war has made a real dent in their chances. How they end up recouping their military strength will likely be the deciding factor in whether they crumble to irrelevancy, or reinforce their bulwark of an empire.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Umhaill

32: Umhaill

Shaggy:

Umhaill has officially fumbled the bag. They had the advantage in the British Isles and north Atlantic, they had an open sea to settle, they had a damn settler walking across Greenland, but all they have to show for it is a New World settlement that is doomed to irrelevance and a war record that is spottier than a leopard. This isn’t to say that they are rumped yet or have no future, they are a European civ with middling opponents after all, but they no longer have feasible northern settlement options and their neighbors have caught up in production and techs. The longer they wait, the harder it gets to break into the competition and so they are this week’s Peak Mid Civ.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Onondaga

33: Onondaga

Reformer:

Onondaga starts the episode with a bang: attacking Anishinaabe before they can recover from their coalition war. Right. Great idea on paper, but the execution leaves a lot to be desired. By the end of the ep, we could see that the war had largely stalemated. Neither side seems able to gain an advantage. This is Onondaga’s lot in life, I fear– to be perennially stuck fighting wars which go nowhere. A sad state of affairs, no doubt.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Herero

34: Herero

Archimedes :

Looking at Herero’s position right now, I’m honestly feeling really well about their prospects. With a +9 jump in states, largely due to their military but also overall, they have been working hard to take their slow start and push for an expansive South African empire. Maravi, their closest neighbour, is primed to be devoured, and these cities would be a wonderful addition to the Herero expanse. Whether they’ll manage to take them before Seychelles however, is the real question.

Herero has been well consolidating their empire in the past few episodes, slowly building up their cities, improving their lands, and pushing their stats higher and higher. With other neighbours of them beginning to stagnate and/or flounder, Herero’s food, production and military are looking greater than average. While their science is definitely below average, and their population is iffy due to some low food bearing lands, they do have a fairly solid lock on the region. Maravi is the obvious choice, but Luba also looks weak enough that a focused invasion could net them a few cities, as Luba both has half the military score of Herero, and they have cut down the majority of the jungle and forests that have hampered previous invasions. Nabbing some cities set in better lands could do wonders for Herero’s prospects.

Herero currently boasts a varied carpet of units, with comp bowmen sprinkled in with swordsmen, spearmen, and horsemen. Not only can Herero use these units to sweep through their enemies lands, their unique shrine replacement will help renew these forces when they inevitably perish. Herero’s Okuruuo Hearth provides an additional +5% production towards Mounted and Pre-Gunpowder melee units per faith generated in a city, and with 20 faith per turn currently generated by their 9 cities, it’s fair to say 5 - 15% production bonus is being distributed in each city, a marked push for production at the minimum. With additional experience from nearby pastures, Herero is pushing for a fast producing and veteran army that can storm their weaker neighbours with little issues.

Whether a Maravi invasion is actually imminent or not, Herero stands a good chance of eliminating them from the game. With Luba next, and then potentially Zazzau, Herero could secure themselves a solid African empire with a little time and effort. Will their dreams be thwarted by the sleepy Seychelles off of their eastern coast? Or will Aures sweep in from the north and stop any plans in their tracks. Herero has an opportunity to make it big, if they play their cards right.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Qara Khitai

35: Qara Khitai

JDT:

Almost everything I said about Hyksos applies ad nauseum to Qara Khitai, with better stats and slightly worse positioning. It's pretty rough to break out of the Tarim Basin when China is all but unified within 100 turns of the game. They still have chances with Mysore’s cut off enclave and Rouran and Bactria not looking amazing but it’ll be an uphill battle. But then again, their stats boost is somehow +18 in the infoaddict ranks, with consistent jumps up, so maybe they stand a better chance of scaling up?

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Potiguara

36: Potiguara

ItsTruckMonth:

In what you could consider this season’s thunderdome, Potiguara are the sleepiest bois around. On one hand, they sit in the top 20 in stats. Unfortunately, that means they’re not even in the top 3 on their continent. Even the rump states have their deterrence: Xavante hides in the Amazon whilst Guaycuru possesses the second largest army on the continent.

Ok, after careful consideration, I can understand the sleepiness now.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Susquehannock

37: Susquehannock

Archimedes :

Susquehannock certainly picked some good civs to brawl with during this North American Thunderdome. While Teotihuacan is certainly a heavyweight contender, they do seem distracted to the west and may be open for a city snipe or two. Karankawa, on the other hand, is a prime target for a Susquehannock invasion. With their empire split between Cajun Louisiana and Acadian Maritime Canada, Susquehannock has an incredible opportunity to bolster their empire with a collection of new cities.

Susquehannock has been able to manage some decent stats for a slightly smaller than average empire. Their production is quite decent, allowing them to pump out units for their invasion. It is slightly concerning however that for their population amount, Susquehannock hasn’t been able to leverage their science as well as they could be doing. With only 20 techs researched, they are beginning to slip behind the region's top contenders, with Tlingit having double the scientific output. Unless Susquehannock can make some serious gains in this war, or leverage their position to begin settling the far arctic north more, they may not have the bulk in their empire to compete statistically with their nearby rivals.

Regarding the war, Susquehannock was able to capture at least one of the northern Karankawa cities. The other two, sitting on Newfoundland, look too highly defended to be taken by just Triremes. Susquehannock will need a serious military push to take this stronghold, and while they do have military units in the area, we may not see enough to actually properly contest the area. To the south, the mainland Karankawa cities are a little bit more plausible, but no proper push has yet to have been made. With Karankawa’s penchant for gifting free cities, Susquehannock may manage to make it out of this war with more than just the one acquisition, but we’ll have to see how their AI handles negotiations. On the Teotihuacan front, the newly acquired Mamey for Teotihuacan represents a serious thorn in Susq naval supremacy, as both a staging point for Teotihuacan’s defense of the region, and as an island with limited land access for Susquehannocks units. Likely no gains will be made from either side here, meaning that their war declarations were likely for diplomatic reasons over any actual desire to gain territory in Mesoamerica.

Susquehannock has an upward climb to be able to match with other regional powers here. Their early aggression against Onondaga may have stunted both of their chances, as both haven’t seemed to be able to recover much after early conflicts. If Susquehannock can properly manage to take some of Karankawa’s cities, the story may end up different, but until they can prove themselves capable enough, they may end up being just another target for Tlingit, Anishinaabe, or Teotihuacan.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Ethiopia

38: Ethiopia

ItsTruckMonth:

You know we give Bjarmia and Portugal shit for doing nothing but GOD DAMN has Ethiopia been sitting under the radar for too long. As the Aures consolidate power to become the dominant power of Africa, Ethiopia has just, well, chilled: built some less-than-useful wonders and not really much else. I can’t even say they’re improving themselves: they’ve dropped to 29th in stats. They’re quite literally mid.

Their one reprieve is that their neighborhood is full of absolutely awful and mid players: Hyskos, Phoenicia, Luba, and the corpse of Maravi all give Zara opportunities. The thing is: will he actually capitalise on these opportunities?

CBR In-Game Screenshot of France

39: France

Reformer:

France, ever excited about declaring this and that war, has this time joined the Pope Butcherers. Which is a very exclusive club, but a club nonetheless. Unfortunately for France, they are failing their entrance exam. Really, they can only blame themselves, for trying to do it through the Alps…and by way of embarking units into the Mediterranean. Not a great showing, no sirree. At least France has a lot of energy, I guess. Might be a bit too much energy, actually, considering the war dec on Wallachia that soon followed. I mean, seriously, there’s an entire Pope in the way, and you’re making no headway. You don’t think it might’ve been slightly premature to join this coalition? Just slightly? Oh, well, it’s no big deal.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Circassia

40: Circassia

NopeCopter:

Circassia’s (attempted) rampage continues as they declare war on Wallachia, utilizing their Black Sea fleet to pose much more of a threat than one might expect. It’s not exactly certain at this point whether they’ll actually take anything in this war, but I would contend that it doesn’t really matter. Ultimately, Circassia is just in a strong position in the mid-term. Circassia’s stats are underwhelming, sure, and their ability to reach beyond the Middle East is looking dubious. However, on the other side of that same coin, Circassia’s stats are MUCH better than anybody else in the Middle East, giving them a lot of potential for growth within that region. Scythia lurks and grows to the north, but aside from their Crimean city, Circassia really isn’t in immediate danger from a Scythian invasion just due to their geography. The Hyksos have a tiny land border, Pakistan’s angle of approach is narrow, and the Seychelles have historically struggled to push inland - as things are now, Circassia looks to have a pretty solid path towards regional power status if they just don’t slow down. And heck, if they can manage to take a city or two off of Wallachia, they may even have a chance to grow beyond that!

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Pomo

41: Pomo

Reformer:

Pomo holds off the Teo-Tlingit coalition pretty alright. Certainly better than I expected. Thanks to this stubborn defense (or their foes’ incompetence), Pomo holds steady in 21st. Only one city lost to Tlingit in the north– well, you have to respect it. Obviously their situation isn’t any better now than it was before, but being able to largely stalemate two numerically superior opponents is no easy feat. It is reminiscent of Yellowknives, come to think of it… well, I digress. Thanks to maintaining position, Pomo retains their Pretty Alright statline. Their stats score is being tanked by their military, which is of course suffering– which, of course, is both expected, and alarming. It goes without saying that the longer this war goes on, the worse Pomo’s odds get. So, Pomo fans best hope they can eek out a diplomatic end to the bloodshed sooner rather than later.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Bunuba

42: Bunuba

JDT: Poor Bunuba, ganked thoroughly by everyone around them. The days where we thought they can slowly scale up and conquer Southeast Asia with their insane science. Now, it's all but certain that they are hardstuck in northern Australia. Ternate has recaptured all their cities and then some, Lanfang has requisitioned their territorial holdings, and NSW prevents any movement down south. It's honestly a bit tough to think of a super viable future for Bunuba in a region as cutthroat as the pacific. In fact, they may even be overranked, as several rankers have stated that they believe that the Bunuba are total dogwater! Nevertheless, for now, they at least have managed to stem the bleeding with NSW peaced out and Lanfang and Ternate depleted, and as long as NSW doesn’t murk them, they will remain fine enough.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Rouran

43: Rouran

Archimedes :

Looking at Rouran now is a far cry from looking at Rouran from episode 5. They’ve very much bolstered their city count, up to a respectable 13, and managed to turn around a fairly awful population and production score to match their contemporaries quite well. They’ve fended off invasions from Green Ukraine, and though they gifted a city to Tang, have otherwise kept a steady wall of resistance against an arguable top contender for the cylinder. But can Rouran really turn things around? Or are they stuck between a rock and a hard place?

On paper Rouran has some very manageable stats. They hold a respectable 162 production, a solid 225 crop yield, are managing a 106 effective science, and still have 12 spare happiness to work with. They have a few cities in questionable locations, settled in freezing snow or scorching desert, but have really gone and filled up the available space. But looking to their east and west, the Rouran comparably are looking a little dire. Both Ket and Tang, powerhouses in the top bracket of rankings, outscore them to a wide margin. Production in the 200s, food in the 300s and 400s,  and science creeping up to 170 means that Rouran looks comparatively underwhelming. Rouran may have better luck in their other two neighbours, Green Ukraine and Qara Khitai, but they both sport rough and mountainous terrain, a wonderful defensive tool against any would be invader. Their options are looking slim, especially with their current carpet of Wiggling Rider horsemen, a unit that isn’t impossible to take cities with as displayed by Scythia and Ethiopia, but one that’s definitely more challenging.

Rouran has recovered well after a slow start, boasting a wide expansive empire that looks comparable to a lot of their test material. But with powerhouses on two sides and immovable mountain empires on the other two, Rouran looks a little closed in as of now. Will they be able to grow strong enough to break through any of these behemoths? With some good diplomacy, or a well timed attack, we may see a resurgence, but they’ll need all the hope they can muster.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Scotland

44: Scotland

ItsTruckMonth:

Mary decides that the North Sea is HER domain and HER’S alone as she declares war on, and brutally dismantles, the Kalmar navy. Simply put, the war has been a massive success, as the Scots have utter dominance over the Shetland and Faroe Islands (bar the Kalmar settlement of Rokside, which is sitting in the red).

Not only that, but they also grabbed Nan Madol in this episode, which provides +1 Food, Production, and Gold for Sea Tiles worked in that city, which should give Edinburgh some nice buffs.

All in all Mary, you’re doin’ good lassie.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Yanomami

45: Yanomami

Reformer:

Yanomami had a nice, calm, casual ep. The one time they got the spotlight, was when they built the Hagia Sophia…mind you, Yanomami doesn’t even have a religion of their own. They’ll just be spreading Caral’s religion. Bit of a waste, but I suppose there isn’t anything better to do while waiting for some tech breakpoints. Compass, for example, to eat up Xaragua. Or perhaps Machinery, to wage war on land. Either way, Yanomami is managing the domestic game quite well, keeping up good stats. The presence of Caral and Teo right next door puts a bit of a damper on the turtling plans, but hey, it’s been working alright so far. Don’t count them out.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Pakistan

46: Pakistan

Orange:

Uruk and Kish conquered, Pakistan is definitely doing well. Though I shall ignore PlatonOfGlaucon’s headcannon of Wifeguy Eannatum being a cuck because I don’t think it’s nearly as funny. Sorry Glaucon, or Platon, or Of, whatever you prefer. Anyways Pakistan also continues to have the largest city by far, with Karachi at a whopping 38 pop, the next largest is at 29. This is definitely a big reason why their stats are so good. While Eannatum is busy fucking one woman, Muhammad Ali Jinnah is fucking *every* woman.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Bangladesh

47: Bangladesh

Semi:

It was a pretty quiet episode for Bangladesh, which is kind of unfortunate given the state of the subcontinent. Pakistan continues to rise into stats-monster status, while Mysore is still extremely respectable. Like I said a couple weeks ago, and Arch emphasized last week, Bangladesh really just needs one more good war. Their science is beginning to slip a little bit (136 EfSci compared to Mysore’s 170 & Pakistan’s 157, though Lanfang has a comparable 139), and it’s not as if a massive food surplus is going to drag them out of that hole - at 32, it’s below the likes of Rouran and Susquehannock. Now that’s not to say Sheikh Mujibur Rahman needs to panic. The civ is still eminently respectable, and definitely still deserves a top 20 rank. Long term though…it’s not great if I’m reminded of episode 5 Potiguara when I look at your situation.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Japan

48: Japan

Msurdej:  

Japan makes a solid play this week with with a war against Green Ukraine. Already Svobodnyy has fallen, and Nikolaevsk-Ussurisky is close to failing. But there was one big problem with the capture; it wasn't done by the UU Ashigaru. These Pikemen get to upgrade to musketmen if they capture a city, and give a promotion that gives courthouse effects when garrisoned in a conquered city. There's no melee units near Nikolaevsk-Ussurisky, but if Hideyoshi can get a few Ashigaru up there, they might get some of the first muskets in the game. And with a bigger mainland army and cities they have full control of, eastern Asia will be their oyster to open.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Seychelles

49: Seychelles

Semi:

Seychelles continues to just kinda exist. They’re still a very respectable Indian Ocean power, with near-top-10 stats and an Effective Science that ranks 7th on the cylinder (& only 10 behind third). Though I will say…their production is not great, sitting at just 161 compared to (for example) Pakistan’s 205.

It’s also interesting to see how Seychelles’ situation has changed over the past few episodes. With the rise of Mysore and Pakistan, and Ethiopia’s stagnation, it seems like East Africa is as open as it’s been since the original Maravi expansion. Meanwhile, Asia looks like where the threats to Seychellois dominance will come from - going east from Pakistan, it’s a who’s who of some of the top civs in the game.

It’s a difficult balancing act for France-Albert Rene, but I think the Seychelles are in a similar spot to as they were during the Maravi coalition: landfall in East Africa south of Glacis would do wonders for their position - and if they can turn it into a real colony like Timor did to Zulu in X3, it’ll probably be Seychelles v. Aures for Africa. (If you’d have said I would claim that in PR0, I would’ve laughed in your face. My, how times change.)

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Caral

50: Caral

Archimedes :

Now you may look at Caral and see a well performing civilization in the Americas, one of many in the region. And looking generally at the consensus of the Power Rankers, they feel the same way. But I’m here to tell you that Caral is actually a top contender in the region, a powerhouse and a champion. I’m here (not paid by Big Caral I swear) to tell you how Caral is on track to becoming a top 5 civ.

Caral stat wise is actually doing quite remarkable. Their production is just shy of heavy hitters like Teotihuacan and is actually higher than other top contenders like Tang, Aures and Lanfang. Their science is doing fantastic, with top 3 effective science and one tech shy of the highest techs. And both faith and culture are doing well, keeping them bolstered as well in the unimportant stats, the kind that round out Caral as an across the board good looking civilization.

Their biggest strength though is just how well they’re doing for their lower than average city count. At only 10 cities, they’re looking comparable in stats to Aures at 15 and Tang at 19. Caral is currently sitting at a staggering 22.7 production per city and 2.0 production per citizen, some of the most efficient use of population on the cylinder. Their food as well is looking great from a per capita perspective, beating out the top contenders like Tlingit, Ket, Tang, Teotihuacan, Aures and Lanfang in one fell swoop. They’re even trouncing the Seychelles, whose only redeeming factor is their population and food production. Caral has fostered a high value empire, and settled high value cities in high value terrain.

Even with all of these benefits, one of the best things going for Caral in the potential department is their access to the Pacific. With Rapa Nui dropping the ball and only sitting at one city, a whole chain of islands lays open and bare, and Caral is by far in the best position to take advantage of it. They’ve already settled a city in Papua New Guinea of their own, and seem to have mapped out a wide swathe of the available islands. Though their happiness currently sits at -1, they have the prospects to almost exclusively take their pick of the litter when it comes to the better islands, potentially even nabbing New Zealand before NSW can figure out deep sea exploration.

Though Caral has a lot of positives, they do face some steep competition in the Americas. The biggest thing keeping them out of the top 10 in most of the rankers eyes is the strength of their neighbours, with Chono and Yanomami being actively strong and in defensible positions. Teotihuacan to the north acts as a barrier that Caral has already been unable to crack, and their Polynesian prospect will eventually be contended by the absolute powerhouse that is New South Wales. While I remain convinced that Caral is in a great position, with strong stats, strong prospects, and a religion that has been keeping them well fed with science and culture, their time may end up stalling depending on the dispositions of their neighbours. As long as Caral can stay the course, and pick their battles wisely, I see them as potential contenders for the king of South America. And, with even further expansions actively being considered, they could even become the king of the Pacific.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Anishinaabe

51: Anishinaabe

Orange:

The war with Onondaga looks like it will be swinging in Anishinaabe’s favor rather quickly, they just have a much better core built up to build units with. But no matter what there’s no victory for Onondaga here, things are looking up for Pontiac.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Mysore

52: Mysore

Shaggy:

No rank change, no shots featuring them, no relevant mentions on anybody else’s slides, no writeup.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Scythia

53: Scythia

ItsTruckMonth:

Ateas has easily established himself as the dominant power of Europe by completely blitzing Vyatka. Dymkovo and Nikulitsyn have been completely speedran by Scythian cavalry, and now their forces stand at the gates. And if you’re worried/relieved that he may be running out of steam, he still possesses the single largest military of anyone on the cylinder right now.

The Eurasian plains shall learn to fear A’toke’as.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Teotihuacan

54: Teotihuacan

Archimedes :

Glory to the Great Goddess of Teotihuacan, precursor to Xochiquetzal, for another grand victory in war! Another glorious conquest has occurred, a grand city in the Caribbean! The might of their Canine Warriors and the sharpness of their Obsidian blades has once again proved that Teotihuacan is the best civ in the Americas! Tremble, enemies of the state, tremble Pomo and Caral and Susquehannock. Tremble anyone who dares say that Teotihuacan is not worthy of its place among the pantheon of greats!

For real though, Teotihuacan has committed another master stroke of a peace deal. Called Tang-lite by some in the community, this is the second city they’ve managed to snag in a peace deal, and one that I think was well deserved. Teotihuacan did a masterful job of clearing out Xaragua’s units, along with some assistance from Karankawa, and definitely lost some of their own units in the scuffle. The city of Mamey is a serious acquisition, with 16 population and strategic positioning, Teotihuacan owns not only a scientific powerhouse of a city, but a strategic gate to the Gulf of Mexico and a solid launching point into an invasion of Susquehannock or another invasion of Xaragua. And, with their religion already surplanted in the city, Mamey acts as a beacon of Tlateomatiliztli to spread into the Caribbean or push into the Eastern American Seaboard.

In addition to their military victories, Teotihuacan has been managing their core empire well. Their production is within the top 6, their food within the top 7, and their science has recovered beautifully, in no small part to both nabbing Writing and nabbing a 16 pop city in the Caribbean. Teotihuacan is currently cleaning up the top of the tech tree, working their way towards Compass and Education, two stellar technologies for their growing science and their coastal positioning. And with plenty of faith and culture, their empire feels very well rounded.

There are two big detractions though, of course. Noted many times throughout the episode, Teotihuacan has basically refused to build a single wonder, something I thought they would be focusing HARD. Luckily enough for them, a lot of the wonders were built by their immediate neighbours who they can later conquer, but their wonder building ability has been sadly unused as of now. The other notable issue with Teotihuacan is their lackluster performance in their war with Pomo. There has been little movement on the front, as for the past 10 turns it seems like they’ve been throwing units into the sea next to Bida’Miwina. Even though Pomo was supposed to be steamrolled by the combined might of Teotihuacan, Tlingit (and Karankawa) the city still stands strong. Knowing Teotihuacan’s track record, they’ll likely end up getting a city or two in an eventual peace deal, but nabbing a city through conquest would add a little bit more ‘oomph’ to Teotihuacan’s list of achievements.

Teotihuacan stands as a stellar example of a midgame civ, with strong stats, an expansive empire, and notable successes so far in this Battle Royale. Their biggest weakness is their neighbours, being in a region where everyone seems to be doing well. A few weaker neighbours are still open routes to expansion, but whether Teotihuacan acts on them, or stays content in their Mesoamerican core will have to be seen. For now though? I, as always, have high hopes for Spearthrower Owl.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Chono

55: Chono

Cloudy:

Another episode with annoyingly little Chono in it. Their stats remain excellent, their stage presence less so. I would say their situation hasn’t fundamentally changed since last episode, but it’s at least good that Bunuba failed to take their New Guinean colony.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of New South Wales

56: New South Wales

JDT: New South Wales drops by one this episode as they peace out with Bunuba, completely failing to do anything of substance against them despite jumping them with the two other powers who can do anything against them. Remember how I said I don’t think Hyksos passes the eye test? New South Wales is the definition of failing the eye test. On paper, their stats are absurd, being second only to Tlingit in production, having a game leading 201 science and growth stats second only to Tang and Mysore (the latter of which has a miscoded UA that supercharges their growth during wars). Furthermore, the entirety of polynesia is still wide open due to Rapa Nui deciding to not play the game. However, this buttfumble of a war against Bunuba proves two things - firstly, they just don’t have the intangibles in them to pierce Bunuba’s Great Wall defenses. Secondly, even if they did, their competition for breaking out north of Australia is going to be tough, and they can expect hard grinds over oceans against Lanfang and co. And therein lies the eternal conceit of the Aussie civ - you win the continent. Now what? Is it even possible to push out from there? Only time can tell for MacArthur and his rum boys.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Lanfang

57: Lanfang

Orange:

The Lanfang push seems to have fizzled out, though they have more fleet coming. The main issue now is that triremes are running out of their time in the spotlight, struggling to be enough to take a city that has a decent amount of strength, which Bunuba’s nearby coastal cities have. But maybe the next push will be able to overcome that problem, land some land units on the shores, something. But I figure their push is probably dead and they should just peace out, maybe try to get something out of a deal. But hey, they did get a few gains from this, and continued to push their presence in the area. In my opinion, Lanfang is way more like to push out NSW than NSW is to push out Lanfang.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Ket

58: Ket

Archimedes :

This Siberian Behemoth has slowly but surely been waking up, with a war with the Kipchaks now concluded and a war with Vyatka fresh off the presses. And while there hasn’t been any huge military pushes on the Urals frontlines, Ket is certainly feasting from their successes. Ket’s unique ability Bagos Sorcery has been doing absolute wonders for the civ, with food earned from killing units within their borders. All of Ket’s frontline cities are noticeably larger than any others in the empire, and even Serkovo stood at a solid 18 population, before dropping all the way back down to 13 after a few turns of starvation. But is population enough to keep Ket in the top 5?

Ket has been steadily consolidating their empire over the past few episodes, coming in at the 6th highest rated civ in the infoaddicts, above Teotihuacan, Aures, and Lanfang. Their production is 4th best in the cylinder with a whopping 275, and their science has at least stayed within the top half of all civs on the cylinder. They overall look very solid, especially with their complimenting religion and cities defensive strength. With their religion nearly uncontested, they’ve managed to amass an incredible 44 defensive strength on their capital, and 46 on some neighbouring cities. Ket has very much set themselves up to be a menace defensively, both religious belief and unique ability in tandem with each other. When they do eventually come to blows with a properly rivalling civ, it will be a veritable bloodbath.

Ket however has been shown to be a bit sleepy as opposed to aggressive. They have, to be fair, captured a couple of cities that were settled within their general sphere of influence. But with no major pushes into enemy territory, Ket has yet to prove they can aggressively conquer their enemies, leading some on the power ranker team to doubt their long term viability. Ket will absolutely last for time immemorial, with such a defensive kit and a penchant for defensive carpets, but they may lack the oomph to actually conquer the rest of their neighbours. We’ll see if they manage an offensive over the Urals, as if they’re able to begin to break into Europe, we may begin to see a truly scary Ket emerge in this game.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Aures

59: Aures

Archimedes :

If you look behind the curtain at the power ranking team’s opinion on Aures, you’ll generally see them placed within the top 5, including a couple #2 placements and even a #1 believer. And somehow, in a cruel twist of fate, Aures has landed in my lap, one of the two people on the team that believe Aures is not quite up to snuff. And while the majority would want you to believe that Aures is in a great position, that they’re the most likely to coast their way into the late game, I’m here to point out a few cracks forming in the facade that Aures is portraying.

Looking generally at Aures’ stats, they don’t seem all together to be the most groundbreaking of numbers. With a low 200s production and a low 300s food, Aures is decidedly under the other heavy hitters in the top ranking spots. Their technology count and effective science seem fine, but are generally more comparable to Teotihuacan, Ket, and Chono rather than the science monsters of Tlingit, Tang, Mysore and New South Wales. Looking a little bit more closely, Aures has fairly average per capita stats regarding their food and production. Unfortunately for them, what citizens they do have are not working high value tiles, or their cities are underdeveloped, leading to an empire that is remarkably wide at 15 cities, but generally poor off. This does mean they have some room for growth, but at the present moment are not properly utilizing what they do have.

Looking at the lands they have settled, Aures lacks a good solid base of well utilizable lands. Starting in Northern Africa has forced them to settle many cities on the edge of the Sahara, an area notable for having low food yielding tiles. Though they have managed to avoid settling many inland desert cities, and the region itself has been buffed to compensate for previous poor performances, looking at a lot of Aures’ cities paints a bleak picture of food poor, production poor spots. Aures has managed well in spreading out and conquering their neighbours, but even then the cities they’ve taken are all right at best, and comparable to their own cities at worst. And what have been relatively easy city captures seem to betray just how defensively poor Aures’ lands are looking, with flat riverless lands punctuated by the occasional hill dominating the defensive terrain available, besides the northern Atlas Mountain range protecting a few of their Northwestern cities.

Aures struggles as well to have any notable bonuses to help shore up their expansiveness so far. Some faith bonuses from pillaged tiles and a granary replacement that bolsters oases and city strength certainly help when trying to take advantage of nearby Hyksos’ religious beliefs, but otherwise Aures looks to not have any true staying power to help them consolidate their lands into a proper core of an empire. They have managed to nab Metal Casting to boost their production, and Civil Service to make some of their farms better, but overall their stats seem underwhelming despite picking up a few key technologies. With Philosophy currently being researched, we could likely see Education coming up soon for Aures as a significant bonus, but whether they can build Universities quick enough in their generally lower production cities is a question to consider.

Aures does have some very notable benefits however, despite a lot of their flaws. While their stats may not be the best, they are certainly in the upper echelon within the cylinder. And, compared to a lot of the other top contender spots, they are significantly more powerful than their closest neighbours. While top contenders like Tlingit and Tang have empires nearby that also share in the top 10 placements, most of Aures’ neighbours are middling at best, hampered by years of wars and harassment. Ethiopia, once a top contender in the region, has waned in power, and empires like Zazzau, Wassoulou, Portugal and the Papal States have been stagnant in their expansion or have been chipped away little by little into statistical obscurity. Aures has been aggressive, expansive, and has many buffer states nearby to push through and conquer, meaning while they may not be the best at the moment, they could keep at their current pace and absorb a lot of the nearby land to drive themselves further in this game. Though I may not be hopeful for their chances in the future, it’s undeniable to see why many have hopes that Aures can truly go the distance.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Tang

60: Tang

Cloudy:

Unwelcome news: Tang’s happiness troubles are back. Thanks to their mad city growth and capture of Nanzan, they’ve plunged far below zero, down to -10 once again, with no hope on the horizon. In fact, the opposite: in 15 turns, their peace deal with Green Ukraine, which gave them 28 happiness, will end. What they are going to do about this is a mystery to us at the moment. I think personally, I’m in denial of how bad it really could be, because the AI just doesn’t struggle with happiness... right?

Regardless, Tang’s stats remain top tier, with the largest empire on the cylinder in terms of number of cities, and top 5 numbers in pretty much every key category. None of their neighbors can meaningfully resist them. As long as these things remain true, they’re unlikely to slip out of the top 3.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Tlingit

61: Tlingit

Archimedes : Once more sitting pretty at the top of the leaderboards, Tlingit is having a dominant run in this game as both the stats leader and the power ranking leader. And with their performance so far it’s not hard to see why. Tlingit has a very solid hold on Alaska and the Pacific Northwest, with a massively productive army and a second place science stat line. Their closest competitor stats wise is New South Wales, a civ that seems hemmed in at the moment, and other top ranked civs all seem to have one issue or another holding them back. Tlingit looks poised to potentially run away with this game, or at least be the big dog in North America.

Though Tlingit doesn’t actually have the highest military on the cylinder, they do have one ranging in the top 5 strength wise. They’ve been able to put it to good use too, actively waging a war on Pomo’s sparsely defended cities in the north. With one city down and one likely to fall, Tlingit has a chance of making some real games over the next few turns, potentially even capturing their first completely inland city. Tlingit has been flirting with cities not on the coastline, with a few 1 tile island cities and a few lake cities now comprising their empire. Their 18 city empire, with one city all the way on the east side of Greenland, is one away from being the largest on the cylinder, and with a military actively bearing down on Pomo and still plenty of space to settle in the north, they’re likely to surpass the happiness plagued Tang any moment now.

Tlingit’s religion is doing a lot of the heavy lifting when it comes to their dominance. Sgáanaang has spread well across Tlingit’s empire, making its way all the way into the farther reaches of the Itelmen sphere of influence. Their god of sea pantheon is likely the highest driver of their production, giving +1 to every coastal resource they’ve been able to grab with their cities. Torii Gates have been fueling faith and tourism output, while also granting extra happiness to keep Tlingits wide empire above board. And I would be remiss to not mention Tlingit’s Council Fires, a belief that should be giving +5 culture and +5 science to cities with 10 followers, but instead is giving those bonuses to any city with the religion, regardless of follower count. The ability has done well for Tlingit, as the founder and the civ with the most cities following their religion, but digging into some of the back end statistics has revealed that Itelmen have also been gaining benefits from the religion, specifically spiking +5 culture and science any time one of their cities is converted. While unintended, this has been an additional boon to Itelmen and likely will be for Japan and Green Ukraine in the future, and an active detriment to all of the other North American civs that have founded their own religions.

There is no doubt that Tlingit is the king of this game so far. With such monumental stats, a wide reaching empire, and a proven track record, it’s no wonder that the power ranking team has (almost) unanimously declared Tlingit the number one spot of this episode. But, there are just a couple of flaws in this behemoth of an empire. While they do have great stats, the land they’ve settled their cities on is generally not the greatest, due to wide swaths of tundra and the occasional snow. They are, as well, hemmed in up in the north, leaving only a few routes of expansion to grow their empire. And while Pomo and Itelmen are not the strongest civs, they do at least have either defensive terrain or a decent carpet to protect them. Tlingits proximity to other well above average powers like Anishinaabe, Teotihuacan, Japan and Tang mean that they likely could be coming to blows soon with powers that at least come close to matching their might. While Tlingit surely is dominant in a vacuum, they do potentially have some troubles in the nitty gritty of the game. They also, bafflingly, have not picked up Writing yet, instead focusing on the bottom of the tech tree. Already nabbing Physics and Machinery, Tlingit is potentially beelining for Gunpowder, the technology required to pick up their unique musketman replacement. This certainly has hampered their science at least a little bit, but has kept them at par with other science competitors due to the science they’ve nabbed from their bugged religious belief.

Tlingit has the chance to take North America and Asia by storm. With Musketmen on the horizon, and an active army already bearing down on their closest neighbour, we’re at the cusp of seeing not only an aggressive Tlingit, but an inland Tlingit. If they can manage to finally break away from the coast and open up some more invasion opportunities, there may not be anything that can stop this keen eyed raven of a civilization.

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