Episode 14: All Will Burn – S1

September 18, 2019

Lordie

201

Abstract

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. In 1400 AD, as strife engulfs all parts of the cylinder, cities will blaze under the light of the sun.

Viewing: Vertical
After That Cliffhanger...
1 / 0
CBR In-Game Screenshot of After That Cliffhanger...

1: After That Cliffhanger...

Welcome back one and all to CBRX, brought to you by Blue Cassette, live on r/civbattleroyale. I am /u/Lordie_Staven, another Power Ranker, modder (albeit of a civ not eligible for CBRX) and a first time narrator, at least of CBRX. For the next 13 turns, I’ll be guiding you through the Cataclysm that is the cylinder, in a state of uproar. Last episode saw two civs brought to near-death, and the upheaval of several civs’ positions – so let’s get started.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of One Does Not Simply Walk Into 59th Place

2: One Does Not Simply Walk Into 59th Place

As you may recall, Algeria and Libya have been brought to their knees by the unholy off-yellow war machines of the Moors and Songhai respectively. Whilst their strife won’t necessarily see the One Ring destroyed and Uruguay collapse, dying alongside each other is certainly plausible.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Vihreally Good

3: Vihreally Good

All credit to /u/Vihreaa for this beautiful map–seeing the cylinder laid out like this really puts a lot of the action into perspective. We have reached the point where cities are being erased in some parts of the world – Canada and North Africa mainly – faster than they’re being settled, which I’m sure is causing some kind of horrendous refugee crisis.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Objectively Helpful Infographic Map-type Aide for Rumble Knowledge

4: Objectively Helpful Infographic Map-type Aide for Rumble Knowledge

If /u/ThyReformer insists on a silly acronym for his war graphic, I’ll give him a better one. SPOR, or as it’s now called, OHIMARK, is very handy for isolating hotspots of blood, sweat and tears. It’s very handy for power ranking and arguing about which civs will gain the most from conflict.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Winstreak

5: Winstreak

Uruguay are, sadly, once again at the top of the rankings, although not entirely unanimously (one ranker had them in second!). Whilst the Guay must be applauded for its stellar performance, their current non-competence in ‘Kuro might see upstart civs challenge their iron grip on the throne. Hopefully. Please.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Time to Tlacopanic

6: Time to Tlacopanic

We enter the third century of turns with a look at Mexico. The Haida have come streaming down the Pacific coast and are beginning to put some serious pressure onto Tlacopan, whilst the Apache are pushing their way into Tlatelolco. It’s not looking too great for Monty, as his lack of a Pacific navy means that he can’t even break up the assault.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Saharan Sunset

7: Saharan Sunset

It’s all looking very grim for Abdelkader. Chlef has fallen but. as has been a big point of discussion this past week, the Moors don’t have a melee unit in range of Taghaza yet, so perhaps, somehow, Algeria can grab a peace deal in the next handful of turns to avoid their fate. It’s looking very, very unlikely though. I’d prime those Fs just in case. Askia, however, in his grace, sees fit to continue to trade with the beleaguered Algerians, sending them food parcels. Such humanitarianism ought to be applauded.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Down Under The Cosh

8: Down Under The Cosh

Adelaide falls, as the wheels are coming off of Australia in spectacular fashion. Without any real army in sight, Hawke’s main saving grace here is that New Zealand doesn't have much of a land force, and none of his other core cities are very accessible by sea. Townsville, where the Kiwis almost settled a while back, has been brought to yellow, whilst Sydney is taking damage. If it falls, the Murri will have legitimately cut Australia in half.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Los Exclaves del Norte

9: Los Exclaves del Norte

As if life couldn’t get worse for the citizens of Londres and Puerto Erina, who’ve just managed to get the hang of Spanish and Bolivarian Socialism, the Métis are banging on the gates as the garrison waits for reinforcements to arrive from the Caribbean. Sadly it doesn’t look like they’ll be able to get there in time, with Port Erin already back in the yellow. I still hold out hope that one of these Minoan boats will eventually snipe a city, even though it’s strongly improbable at best.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Struck A Merv

10: Struck A Merv

Incensed by the audacity of the Golden Horde to ruin Merv’s previously symmetrical borders, the Seljuks decide to declare war! Well, something like that. In actuality it appears that a bribe from Nyatsimba Mutota was enough for Alp Arslan to declare war on their immediate neighbour, without having much of an army and whilst fighting a losing battle with Parthia. Way to go, Alp. This’ll end well.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Live And Let Libya

11: Live And Let Libya

In a situation quite the opposite of Algeria, it looks like Libya have bought themselves more time on the cylinder: recapturing Tripoli and making peace with the Moors means that they have until Songhai manages to break down the hastily patched walls. It’s not looking amazing, but it’s a sight better than their (former) western neighbours.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Gambu’s Gambit

12: Gambu’s Gambit

This is looking better and better for the Murri, with Sydney down to half thanks to a quite frankly staggering amount of composite bowmen. Furthermore, Australia’s army is still AWOL, although they are producing longswordsmen which can probably stem the bleeding. The question is how many limbs will they lose before they stabilize?

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Amphibious Atthuac

13: Amphibious Atthuac

The Aztecs may have retaken Tlacopan, but it’s come at the cost of effectively surrendering Calixtlahuaca to the Apache. Displaced Poverty Point units look on, as they question how one can survive having settled more than two cities, and wonder what a port is. Tlatelolco is slightly more damaged but its defensibility (highest defense city in the shot) is keeping it standing.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Here We Go Again

14: Here We Go Again

Oh, Alaric, why do you tempt us so? The Goths reopen the Horde Wars as they declare on their Golden neighbours. Last time, you may remember, it went downright terribly for them, as did all of their wars to date. Those citadels to the west of Sarai Berke are handy though, and with a technologically superior and far larger army, on paper the Goths can make ground here. Then again, on paper the Goths should own most of Europe by now. Hey, maybe the moral support from the Taungoo will make the difference!

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Abdelkadead

15: Abdelkadead

It’s never nice to see a civ eliminated in such a callous fashion, but Algeria’s demise has been sad for a number of reasons. A civ with no concept of self-preservation, they settled far and wide, only to be gobbled up repeatedly by their neighbours. Just when they managed to secure peace with the Songhai, the bane of their prospects, the Moors swarmed over the Mediterranean, and dismantled the Dey-Line protecting the nation. Only one Dey remains now, chronicling the times as Abdelkader is given a viking funeral in the embers of Taghaza. Rest in peace, you crazy soul.(Having analyzed it, given that I said there wasn’t a melee unit in range, the theory I came up with:The horseman that took the city is the one that was outside Chlef, however the slide was taken before the Moors moved. As they have open borders with Songhai, the horseman only had to move 6 tiles to attack the city, all but one of which are desert. This is more than doable in two turns, with two moves left to attack the city.)

Lime’s note: Lordie is correct

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Choosing Nishapurly

16: Choosing Nishapurly

Merv falls all-but-instantaneously into the red as the combined Caspian offensive obliterates the shreds of resistance remaining inside the city. At the opposite end of the empire, Nishapur has been settled into oblivion by Indira. From the borders you can just about see that Alp’s naval invasion into the Middle East hasn’t yet reaped any sort of dividends, and with just nine military units inside his land borders, it’s looking very grim. As always in this part of the world, however, the terrain is very strong, and Isfahan itself could even rival ‘Kuro for defensibility at this stage of the game. If that fails, well, the Seljuks have their island retreat.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Korea Prospects

17: Korea Prospects

Here we have a shot of the new and improved Korean empire. After the embarrassments in Pyongyang and Daegu, Seonjo has rebounded in a big way. He’s taken brilliant advantage of Shikoku’s inactivity and taken over almost all of Northern Honshu as well as Hokkaido, creating a pretty formidable secondary core, and one that could be a perfect staging ground for expansion south or even north. The caveat, of course, is that their capital shares no borders with this Neo-Korea, and may well end up being the price that is paid for this new lease of life.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Oil Is Flammable

18: Oil Is Flammable

The Métis take both Port Erin and London, but the cost of the fighting is great, as both cities are engulfed in flames. With minimal Venezuelans nearby I doubt either will be saved, leaving thousands to wander the Canadian wilderness, cold and alone. The Minoan voyagers watch on, recording all in hidden messages which will eventually wind their way to Minos in his pan-cylindrical labyrinth. In other news, the Moors stop their genocide of the Algerians.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of More Like Misery-ta

19: More Like Misery-ta

A troop of Mandekalu Cavalry break down the last Libyan resistance in Tripoli, leaving Misrata, once more, as the last bastion of Omar’s defense. They might be able to retake it, but for Venice’s borders sealing off that one trireme to the far right of shot, especially with the swarm of Great Galleasses. It’s looking more and more grim by the second..

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Flash In The Tlacopan

20: Flash In The Tlacopan

Tlacopan is about to flip back to Haida, as Calixtlahuaca drops to the red also. Tlatelolco has taken a bit more damage, and Culhuacan is now totally open to invasion. Apache still in the ascendancy, basically. Haida’s open borders with Apache is coming in super clutch here, as they’re actually able to navigate this far south. Meanwhile in the sidebar, Qing, in their quest for relevance in China, declare war on Canton.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Bisection

21: Bisection

Townsville drops to the red, and either the Murri or New Zealand (or even Tonga!) could take it and split Australia into two separate halves. Even more worryingly, Sydney is in the black and the Murri have several melee units kicking about. It looks like some military might have reached Beerwah, but it’s not taken damage yet. The Aussie navy and army are technologically superior, but the sheer weight of numbers sent forth has so far absolutely trounced them. Matters could be made worse, as a Kiwi army is landing in New South Wales.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of We Gonna Berea Here

22: We Gonna Berea Here

Congratulations, Alaric, you’ve managed to underwhelm us once more. The new city of Berea not only makes it easier for the Golden Horde to invade, by removing a citadel, but if it flips, then the Horde will gain control of the adjacent citadel and a major chokepoint. And it’s already at yellow. The Goth frontline, on the other hand, has made marginal progress around Sarai Batu. In the sidebar however, there appears to be a much more dynamic war…[NOTE, NOT PART OF NARRATION: Dawkinzz can you do your best amani voice for the name of this slide, like, at the end of this video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JmndxoF74qQ]

CBR In-Game Screenshot of No Ch’il Whatsoever

23: No Ch’il Whatsoever

That’s right, the Iroquois have declared on the Apache, in a war that promises to take place across the breadth of a continent. Ch’ilvozh is already down to yellow, as the Lumberjack Legions swarm the city. The settler to the west will probably get cut down before they found a city – which in all honesty is a good thing for the Apache and a small mercy. However, this is only one side of the conflict, as the two civs share a border just out of shot as well.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Appalachian Assault

24: Appalachian Assault

Further south, however, neither side looks too hot out of the gates. The advantage certainly seems to be with the Iroquois, although Hiawatha’s defenses seem somewhat lighter outside Montreal. We must spare a thought, though, for that poor Apache comp bowman, shredded by the line of citadels which has led to the displacement of all those Poverty Point units. A similar aggressive citadel-chain can be seen south of Tchihende too – they must really hate Tahera round these parts.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Prepare to be Sulomayzed

25: Prepare to be Sulomayzed

We take a break from an exciting theatre of the cylinder to stop by the frigid north. There’s usually not much going on, but wait! Somehow our favourite sleepy shamans, the Evenks, have managed to find the lost city of Sulomay, and bring it into capturable range! Bombogor has sent a not-inconsiderable force here too, and perhaps a fair-sized conquering is on the cards. Evenk shamans will surely tell stories for generations about the noble soldiers who saw through the cowardly Nenet invisibility magic.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Mess-o’-America

26: Mess-o’-America

Credit to u/BanthaFood for the AI game to inspire that title. Tlacopan falls once more to Haida, but Calixtlahuaca (which I’m now calling Cali) drops to the Apache, and Geronimo’s troops have almost whittled down Tlatelolco. Tlacopan will probably keep flipping until someone brings a land army south, which I doubt Haida can muster. Monty does seem to be dredging units up from somewhere, so maybe he can halt the offensive here and limit the damage.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Secu-rity Risk

27: Secu-rity Risk

Deep in the jungles of ‘Kuro, near the thickets of the Amazon delta, Lavalleja’s forces have, at great cost, secured a breach into Secu, a Kuikuro forward outpost. “Aha,” he says to his generals. “If we utilize our naval capability, we can bypass the los diablos verdes and attack directly!” This ability to reposition troops has probably made the difference, as they’ve forced the city into the yellow.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Tlat’s The Way (Ah-ha, Ah-ha)

28: Tlat’s The Way (Ah-ha, Ah-ha)

Finally, after decades of trying, the Apache have taken Tlatelolco, the mountain fortress. Tlacopan flips back to the Aztecs, as interestingly for the religious-minded, it appears the Apache core is the dividing line between the western followers of Angakkunngurniq, the Yup’ik religion, and Orenda, that of the Iroquois. This war, however, has facilitated Angakkungurniq’s transition into Mesoamerica, where it will probably meet Uruguayan Catharism in and around Venezuela. I’m sure some viewers appreciated that.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Going Berserk

29: Going Berserk

It’s a dark day indeed for Robert the Bruce and the Scots, my IRL people, as the first Viking land unit arrives in Aberdeenshire. Whether spawned by that Longship, or simply having sailed over from Norway, the diminution of the Scottish carpet puts them in ever-increasing jeopardy. The fact that both cities can be attacked from more than one tile can, and will, probably mean that the cities will fall at some point barring a miracle. The Vikings have also brought over a settler, to add insult to injury.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of A Ch’il Down Your Spine

30: A Ch’il Down Your Spine

Here’s the real cause of the Appalachian Conflict, methinks: the twin cities of Ch’ilwozh and Tsézhiné. The Lumberjack Army has already chopped the former into the black, whilst the latter is besieged by the infamous Turtle Fleet, powered not just by the wind, but the enormous spiritual energy of Orenda. Whatever floats your boats, I guess. There’s also an amusing conga line of tomahawk raiders leading to Tsézhiné.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Town & Country

31: Town & Country

Townsville has fallen to the Kiwis, partitioning Bob Hawke’s empire into East and West Australia. Sydney is still in the black, however it seems the Aussies have been targeting Adelaide, which is still in the red. The New Zealand army that was approaching Canberra also seems to have vanished, whilst the Murri now turn their sights on Melbourne. Where’s that West Australian army when they need it?!

CBR In-Game Screenshot of It Had To Happen Evenktually

32: It Had To Happen Evenktually

Sulomay falls, with the Evenks retaking the city after 17 turns, and almost 200 years. It’s almost a pity it won’t be for long, as the Nenets have the firepower to wrest it straight back again, but good on Bombogor for never giving up! The war is the second oldest on the cylinder (after Zimbabwe-Benin) and it took no less than 80 turns for the first flip, and we’re at 97 when it’s been undone. I’m convinced time simply passes more slowly up here due to some latent cryogenic effect.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Told You So

33: Told You So

Yep, Berea flips, and with it, Gothic control over the west Caucasus. However, our favourite monochrome marauders have managed to dismantle Tokhtamysh’s army, and are advancing on Sarai Batu. It’s a welcome change from the blundering we’re used to? Even if it did come at the cost of some hard-won land further south.  

CBR In-Game Screenshot of SCS Skirmish

34: SCS Skirmish

Down in the South China Sea, a small fleet of Qing carracks receive a message from home: “Due to Cixi’s latest bout of boredom-induced madness, we’re now at war with the Sulu Sultanate. Best regards, Beijing.” This was presumably followed by the admiral looking up and spotting an idling Proa, and calling a full-on assault. This slide also provides a nice view of the Taungoo contentedly settling the Philippines, whilst Jamalul does a bit of nothing.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of If You Can’t Handle ‘Dakheat

35: If You Can’t Handle ‘Dakheat

I’m aware it’s probably not pronounced like, “Dak Heat” but still. The hyper-callous Iroquois settle a new city on the Hudson as they’re bringing the Apache’s two northeastern cities down into the red and black. Geronimo is surely feeling both a desire for peace and despair at the loss–although somehow HIawatha hasn’t managed to take Ch’ilvozh, maybe the Lumberjacks are too polite to take cities?

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Blu Secu

36: Blu Secu

Uruguay make their first major gain in the great ‘Kuro war, as they take Secu. It’ll probably flip at least once, what with all the Kuikuro units right next door. It does look like Lavalleja has managed to wedge his foot in the door a bit more than previously, but this northern front is the only place where he’s made big progress.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Protecc, Attacc, Now They Come Bacc

37: Protecc, Attacc, Now They Come Bacc

Finally, the West Australian Army has begun to push back against the Murri, with the green-and-gold horde sweeping across the northwest. Townsville is still Kiwi but unreinforced and in the red, and the Aussie army is vastly out-teching the Murri. It’s actually a bit of a risk for Gambu, as New Gunnedah is undefended, as is, of course, Beerwah, already in the yellow. How soon these civs make peace will depend how much of a future effect this war will actually have, it seems.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Siberian Struggle

38: Siberian Struggle

Sulomay is taken back by the Nenets, but the Evenks have assembled the largest collection of reindeer cavalry ever seen in the CBR, stretching for hundreds of miles. Truly we have not seen such a show of strength ever in the history of warfare upon the cylinder. From this part of the world, anyway.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of All Is Lost

39: All Is Lost

It seems like the end is inevitable for Omar now. The chance to retake Tripoli is gone, and now the Songhai bear down on Misrata. Barricaded in his chambers, he prays to Allah for deliverance from the hordes of Askia. The last Al-Qayid watches from afar, and may be all that is left of the once migh–uh, not terrible nation.Also, the Moors have their UU, the Granadine Cavalry, getting seshed in the Balearics.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Keeping it Mont-real

40: Keeping it Mont-real

Despite the name, the city of Battleford shows peaceful relations betwixt the Apache and Métis, with their open borders agreement contributing significantly to the ease with which Geronimo has advanced on Montreal. It’s likely that there is a great battle going on just out of shot to the south, as well as to the northeast, but around the Great Lakes posturing seems the order of the day. That, and miscellaneous Poverty Point units. Can they do something already?

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Bothnian Battle

41: Bothnian Battle

The Sami finally yawn their way into action with a DoW onto a largely unsuspecting Prussia. Although the navies are matched, with both civs fielding a naval carpet, Eadni’s land army is gigantic, albeit lacking many melee units. If the Sami can gain a naval advantage, expect Magdeburg to flip as it’s very exposed, however other cities will all probably require land forces. Frederick seems to have been anticipating a Viking attack, with all his citadels directed westwards, so his goal is likely to stall until reinforcements can cross the Baltic. As always, the Galea Chroniclers look on, always watching.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Sarai Battered

42: Sarai Battered

What is this? Alaric making progress?! It certainly seems so, with the Golden Horde pushed back and Sarai Batu taking damage. As we know, he’s got this far before, however the Goths seem much more prepared than last time. Interestingly, the Horde have very few melee units, so if the city flips it could be for a long time. Come on Alaric! You can do it!

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Hot In The Cold

43: Hot In The Cold

After capturing Tsézhiné, Hiawatha decides to use it as kindling for a great bonfire to warm up his warriors in the frigid north. Realistically, I’d imagine with all the warring his happiness is fairly low, like with many of the big civs.Meanwhile, the Métis settle Paddle Prairie, which I assume to be some kind of water-based theme park featuring rides and experiences based off of Louis Riel’s greatest achievements. Be amazed at the Battle of Winnipeg Re-enactment, through the medium of synchronized swimming! Be like a Greenlandic explore on the Nor’easter Boat Ride! All this and more for the modest admission price of ten gold!

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Merving In

44: Merving In

As might have been expected, Merv falls quickly, although it’ll never regain those lovely borders. Down to two core cities, the Seljuks are in a massive pickle–especially when Nishapur has been starving to death. The Parthian war machine is inexorably making progress, and should Palmyra decide to re-engage, it’s likely that Alp would lose Persia in less than ten turns. As it is though, he fights a heroic rearguard, thankful that Hordic ambitions seem to have been satisfied with Merv itself.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Keeping The Peace

45: Keeping The Peace

It wouldn’t be a CBR without an island civ distributing peacekeepers, and it seems Madagascar have stepped up to the plate. Macao, Taiwan, and Ryukyu have all been designated Heritage sites by the UM (United Madagascans) and so are committed to being saved for future generations. Or until the open borders with Shikoku ends. Qin is looking surprisingly sparse in its core, actually, although Canton are unlikely to try anything, given the last few wars in this part of the world.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Full Nelson

46: Full Nelson

At last, the Marianas have been settled. The presence of non-Astronomy civs suggests that the islands have been habitable for some time, but it is New Zealand that have staked their claim therein. I believe it is either Saipan, or Anatahan, that has been settled, but the city is somewhat idyllic, with atolls abound, and lovely cows. Probably an instant leap to top five most livable locations on the cylinder.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Enemies Qinbound

47: Enemies Qinbound

The drums of war beat once more in South China: the Qin have redeclared on Canton, and although the majority of their army is near the Khamug border, it will be but turns before they are banging on Ching Shih’s front door. Her saving grace may be Qin’s total lack of a navy, as they might not be able to follow her to the Philippines, but it’s just as likely she gets finished off by someone else. Better to use the navy to keep flipping cities until peace becomes an option whilst using the defensible Hong Kong to stay alive. It’s not as bad as it may sound on face value for Canton fans but this really isn’t ideal, at all.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of The Fear of Goth

48: The Fear of Goth

Sarai Batu is in the red. The Goths have overwhelming numbers. At this point, losing Berea seems like a masterstroke from Alaric, the 900 IQ general. If this city doesn’t flip, Alaric loses every trust ever placed in his inclusion. However should he triumph, and redeem some of his sins, it could be the start of a Gothic renaissance, both in our minds, and our hearts. Also, people don’t like the Golden Horde, apparently–Ragnar is the latest to drop a DoW.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Just A Secu

49: Just A Secu

Back to ‘Kuro, and Anetu has resecured Secu for the time being. Uruguay will probably retake it, though, completing a several-thousand-mile stretch of Uruguayan coastline all the way to Paysandu. As always, the Minoans observe with us, from their holiday home in the Uruguayan Lesser Antilles.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Fetch Some Beerwahter

50: Fetch Some Beerwahter

Beerwah burns under the Outback sun, as the West Australians reunite their empire with the capture of Townsville. It looks like a huge momentum shift in this war, with New Gunnedah down to half, and Sydney regaining HP. You’d hope Gambu and Seddon back out now and keep their gains, otherwise it’s not impossible Hawke can roll it all back. He’s made the first step: Peace with Haiti, the destroyer of top ranked civs.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Thinly Spread

51: Thinly Spread

The Métis have been oft criticized for their lack of an army, and from this shot, you can see the argument. Whereas other civs keep up a permanent carpet, the Métis have a medium sized army spread across their gigantic empire. Also, lots of it is in the Arctic Ocean at the moment. Concerningly, like a number of large civs, there are rebel barbarians spawning in their empire although these shouldn’t be much trouble to deal with. The Apache army amassed on and in their borders, moreso.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Not ‘Elbing

52: Not ‘Elbing

The front nobody expected is here, in the frozen north, as the Prussian and Sami fight for control over the cylinder’s worst canal city. The Sami should take it–Elbing is hopelessly isolated from any reinforcement–but the limited access and natural chokepoints are making the offensive difficult. The armies clash, unaware that unseen Nenetsi eyes are copying their actions down, for use against the accursed Evenks.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Closing The Circle

53: Closing The Circle

The Métis have arrived on Baffin Island, looking to resettle it following the destruction of Tsézhiné. The Baffin Bay, surprisingly, is occupied by a Haitian fleet, presumably cut off centuries ago by border expansion and left to die in the cold. It seems like the Métis are angling towards completing a full arc around the Labrador peninsula, to prevent other civs escaping to Europe (looking at you, Canada). Interestingly, Ch’ilvozh still hasn’t flipped, though. Uruguay build the Globe Theatre, it looks like, for the Colorados and Blancos to put on contrasting plays to get public support.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Culhuacan Story, Bro

54: Culhuacan Story, Bro

Finally, Tlatelolco has fallen, and the new focus of Apache attack is Culhuacan, already to the yellow. By pushing through the Aztec frontline, the Apache have given themselves an opportunity to almost stroll straight up to Tenochtitlan, as with Cali secured, and the Haida controlling Tlacopan, their forces are relatively unopposed. Apart from navigating around Poverty Point refugees, at any rate. Regarding Tlacopan, actually, the Aztec disorganization seems to have gifted Haida the chance to get some health on the city, something which really isn’t good for Monty.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Coming To Stay

55: Coming To Stay

This slide paints a terrible picture for Scotland. Stirling starving and in the red. Melee units outside Edinburgh. Settlers landing in the Northeast. From a Viking perspective, however, it’s a much needed redemption arc, as after an unimpressive early-game, they’ve managed to take the opportunities where they can find them. If they managed to take out Scotland, it’d be a huge boon and step to becoming a major naval power, and the one we expected them to be.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Aloha~

56: Aloha~

Fans of the Hawaii Battle Royale, rejoice! Shikoku have settled the Paradise of the Pacific with Uwojima. Meanwhile, the Sulu have Explorers, a nifty EE unit that has extra sight and movement when embarked. Unfortunately, they’ve explored a Papuan Caravel, and the two have fought – they’ve been at war since last part, in something that went entirely under the radar. Surprising, as they share a major border. Regardless, much rejoicing should be had as we now have our successor Hawaiians.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Inevitable

57: Inevitable

Another shot documenting Libya’s slow demise. Not much has changed since we were last here, except for the Libyan army entirely disappearing, leaving Omar alone with his fate, hoping is ever-more-desperate prayers are answered. Sadly, the gods of this universe are but figments of the imaginations of men, for the Babylonians are the true creators of the world. Now, there’s a rather interesting notification on the sidebar, and the more eagle-eyed readers will be scanning the minimap to work out what city has flipped...

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Sarai Not Sarai

58: Sarai Not Sarai

Finally. The Goths take Sarai Batu (sorry, Viking fans) and it doesn’t look like the Golden Horde will be able to flip it. A massive win for the Goths – neutering their neighbour, grabbing a good city and maybe setting themselves up for more captures. I’m unsure if they’ll get any further–Sarai Berke in particular is all but impregnable at the minute – but any Goth fan should be proud of the achievement.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Ninstint Gratification

59: Ninstint Gratification

We see that the world has, on average, moved into the Renaissance, with the Haida capital of Ninstints recognized as the pinnacle of civilization as we know it. Behind the popup, we can see that the Qin-Canton border is alive with conflict, and that it seems Cantonese forces are spilling into the Qin heartland. Shikoku do seem to be moving troops over to China, however, which isn’t so good for Ching.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Caucasian Isolation

60: Caucasian Isolation

Here we see the majority of the Golden Horde’s down-translated empire. Trading their capital for Merv seems folly now, as they’re trapped between the hammer of the Goths and the Palmyrene anvil. Majar in particular is extremely exposed to Zenobia. If the Goths can keep up their military production, it’s not impossible Berea could flip back, but I’m really not sure if any other cities would go at this point in time.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Marathan Majesty

61: Marathan Majesty

What a beautiful sight. A complete carpet of citrus-coloured crossbowmen. A weapon to surpass Metal Gear, truly. Shivaji has really beefed out his core, though, with some big cities, as well as claiming all the unclaimed land he can see–Nashik has just expanded to claim Sri Pada. Marathan settlers flood seas to the east, and it appears that the Nepalese menace is held at bay. I was one of a few Power Rankers who thought Maratha would be the strongest on the subcontinent, and it’s quite rewarding to be validated.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Highland Farewell

62: Highland Farewell

Stirling falls to the Vikings, and is immediately set ablaze by the sheer fury of the Northmen. More units are landing in the northeast, whilst a massive armada crosses the North Sea. Unless that unit behind the longship icon is a melee unit (unlikely), Scotland have been relegated to city-state status, likely to survive about as long as their carpet lasts in the face of Viking aggression.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Emrati Occupation

63: Emrati Occupation

Nizwa, like Batticaloa before it, is full of peacekeepers. It was the Afghans in Mk2, but now Madagascar has stepped up to the role with aplomb. Interestingly, there are no Parthian military units within the city’s borders, with Indian ships making port there instead. The Seljuk offensive, however, has fizzled out. Uruguay build another wonder, this time the Topkapi Palace, which provides faith from military buildings. It’s one of the less impactful wonders, thankfully.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Longsword To A Gunnedah Fight

64: Longsword To A Gunnedah Fight

It’s getting worse and worse for the Murri. Gunnedah has fallen, and Sunshine Coast is in the red. Sydney still stands. For the Kiwis, Townsville is lost. Where Beerwah was, a settler stands. The saving grace, if there is one, is that the West Australian relief force is itself wearing thin, and probably can’t do much more than undo the Murri gains. That in itself thought, would represent a phenomenally huge loss for Gambu, who really needed this big win.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Four Corners

65: Four Corners

The Kazakh-Nepalese war comes to a close, with Madras’s borders having prevented any conflict from really occurring. At the same time, the Kazakh and Nepalese borders have also prevented the Indian-Khamug war from going anywhere. Had the roles been reversed, that is to say, India-Kazakh and Khamug-Nepal, we might have seen some action, however the power of politics once again lets down the spectator. Possibly of note; the Kazakhs don’t have a huge carpet whilst the Khamugs do. This is pretty well reflected in their respective Power Rankings.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of This Is The End

66: This Is The End

It’s all over but the crying for Libya. The fat lady is warming up her vocal cords. Misrata is deep in the red, and should a dogpile occur, no less than five civs could claim Omar’s scalp: the Moors, Songhai and Venice, but also the Vikings and Goths, owing to some wayward ships. However, it will almost certainly be the Songhai. Godspeed Omar, you will be missed.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of ‘Hlo-’Hlo

67: ‘Hlo-’Hlo

If any shot is as indicative of the sheer power of Alpha Israel’s defense, this is it. Zimbabwe are looking more depleted than I can remember, with unit after unit committed to the meat grinder that is the Semien front. They have crippled Madagascar’s mainland city, and their stats are still phenomenal, but all is not well in Zimbabwe, especially when it looks like Ndongo have a military to rival them.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Sneaky Socialists

68: Sneaky Socialists

Lo and behold, OHIMARK, SPOR, whatever you call it, fails to address a war. Easy to see why–Venezuela and the Apache have never shared a border. However with the capture of Culhuacan, the Venezuelan Gulf fleet has struck at the city, keeping it in the yellow. I’d be extremely surprised should it fall–it’s only got one coast tile–but Chavez’s desire for exclaves clearly knows no bounds. Meanwhile, the Apache pressure on the Aztecs seems to have abated, and as for Tlacopanwatch: back in the red but without Aztec units adjacent.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of S’Omar, So Fern

69: S’Omar, So Fern

And with our first double-kill part of CBRX, we say goodbye to the good guys of North Africa, the green machine, Libya. A civ that wanted nothing more than to spread religion, and a message of gurus and faith, they were brutally cut down from all angles. Suffering from almost the opposite problem to Algeria, they didn’t expand enough, and were all too quickly boxed in and now snuffed out by an uncaring Songhai. As Misrata burns, let us remember Omar Mukhtar, not as the broken man cut down as he prayed to an uncaring god, but as the man he would have wanted us all to be: caring, honest, kind, and altogether too good for this cylinder.Also, Shikoku and Haida made peace.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Reverse Sweep

70: Reverse Sweep

With the fall of Sunshine Coast, the Murri have officially broken even in this war. This is not a good thing. With their army in full retreat, it looks like what appeared to be a perfectly executed strategy is all for naught. The Western Aussie army has replenished thanks to the strong WA production base, and it is certainly plausible the Murri lose Gosford as well. Any time now would be good for a peace deal, Gambu. In other parts of the world, Scotland get a brief reprieve after making peace with the HRE, and Zimbabwe DOW Songhai in retribution for killing poor Omar.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Fair Bonnie Banks

71: Fair Bonnie Banks

No high road nor low road exists around that mountain (presumably meant to be Ben Nevis) for the Scottish swordsman south of Stirling, but for which they could save the city from crumbling to ash. Things are dire for Robert right now, and I could easily see him falling in the next ten turns, especially if that Viking army makes landfall. If so, I’m not sure on what the record is for most consecutive parts with an elimination, but I doubt there were more than three. It’s sad but, Scotland, my true love, I may ne’er see again.

[NOTE NOT IN NARRATION: Sad bagpipe music please, either Loch Lomond or Highland Cathedral]

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Hollow Core

72: Hollow Core

The Songhai heartlands are entirely barren of units, which in all honesty, is to be expected given the number of units invested to take out Libya and Algeria before them. It’d be far more of an issue if they hadn’t brutalized Benin with citadels, and if they didn’t own the Great Saharan Highway to transport units across the desert. Nubia, interestingly, have a decent-sized carpet brought to bear, alongside one of the last Libyan units, a comp bowman sheltered by friendly armies.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Political Mainzfield

73: Political Mainzfield

First of all, damn, what a citadel from Venice. If they can carpet that up that may prove to be an oustanding play from Enrico, as it’s won him what I believe to be four tiles, given him a route right up to Regensburg. The only way he could go one better is to place one on the hill west of Mainz, which could net him five tiles. Somehow, the HRE and Vikings are blockading Peel – I’m not entirely sure how the mechanic works, but it seems odd at best. Overshadowing all this, however, is that war declaration that’s just popped up. Oh yeah.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Clash of the Titans

74: Clash of the Titans

Not many wars have come close to this one in relevance. The two giants of the mediterranean squaring up in a battle for the ages. The Moors have declared the War of North African Expansionism, presumably owing to Songhai’s additional warmonger penalty, and have the clear naval advantage. With regards to boots on the ground, though, I think I’d give the edge to Askia. This war is all about whether the Moors can reinforce and keep their North African holdings – if they can, it’s a fantastic staging ground for future maneuvers. If not, it cements Songhai as the strongest civ in the region and grants them another capital and possibly first place in the Power Rankings. A lot at stake.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of A Gulf Between Them

75: A Gulf Between Them

Stettin and Romsa appear to be the main focal points of the Bothnian War, as each side plays to its strengths, the Sami Army and the Prussian Navy. It’s a shame Eadni didn’t fill out the land south of Divtasvuodna, that citadel-chain could have made an invasion of Frankfurt An Der Oder very straightforward. As it stands, the major difference-maker could be that Minoan ship, as it’s preventing Eadni’s Karelian fleet from moving into the Baltic and allowing an advantage to Frederick. However, I don’t see a way, even if they flip it, that Prussia hold on to Romsa, whilst Eadni could quite easily hold Stettin (or Szczecin, which is the much cooler sounding Polish name of the city).

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Delta Force

76: Delta Force

Yep, Secu goes back to Uruguay, and with no Kuikuro navy in sight, they’re probably going to keep it. In the bottom left of the slide, you can see that the jungle knights have managed to reach the walls of Kuhikugu, where boulders, snakes, and boulders covered in snakes rain down atop them. But these special forces have trained for decades in secret Blanco camps, hidden far from Colorado eyes, and are an unstoppable, plate-armored fighting machine, fearing no man nor beast that the jungle can hide. Of course, the city hasn’t taken damage yet, and the Uruguayans have only just got there, but I’m sure that’s the kind of sentiment Lavalleja has.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Adelaide Reaction

77: Adelaide Reaction

From bad, to worse, for the New Zealand-Murri Coalition. Adelaide is in the red and looking likely to fall, with more ships inevitably making their way around from Western Australia. However, a Murri pikeman is in a position to potentially capture Sydney! If the Murri can take but this prize, it will have been surely worth the fighting! New Zealand are also fielding a new ship from EE: the Galleon. This could potentially give them enough of an edge to retake or even hold Adelaide and sue for peace. All is not yet done and dusted Down Under.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Double-Edged Swords

78: Double-Edged Swords

Well then. Haida make peace with the Aztecs, without keeping Tlacopan–however they’ve still gained from this was so it’s no big loss. Culhuacan is in the red, with the Aztec navy, small as it is, putting sufficient pressure on the city to potentially take it. On the other hand, Tlacopan is very low, and that Apache trireme in the Baja could easily get in there to cap it. Very uncertain times in Mesoamerica, however the Apache have certainly come off better than the Aztecs. They also make peace with Venezuela, as do the Métis, preventing any more exclaves.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Madeira Madness

79: Madeira Madness

Despite everything, it is the island city of Walbah where the fighting is currently the fiercest between the Moors and Songhai. Hombori is also blockaded, god, how does that even work. Ah, okay, so it’s if a naval unit is within two tiles and there’s no other connection to the capital, which means that harbors mitigate it? I’ve no idea, it’s not until this part when I actually questioned the logistics of the mechanic but it seems awfully complex. As I puzzle, the last Dey looks on, considering the offer from a hooded Minoan to chronicle the world’s events to compile an alternate record of the Cylinder, to be stored deep within the labyrinth.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Saratoga Sayonara

80: Saratoga Sayonara

We finish up this episode with a shot of the new Iroquois city of Saratoga on Baffin Island. Ch’ilvozh hasn’t yet fallen, Canada are still on two cities, the Métis are lurking, and all is well with the world. Uruguay have built another wonder, Versailles, which gives them WLTKD bonuses, as if they needed them. Very well, it has been my pleasure to take you through the rain of fire that has been this part, as cities burn on four continents with two dead civs behind them, I’ve been /u/Lordie_Staven, I hope you enjoyed the episode, and hopefully I’ll see you again!