Civ Battle Royale

Episode 17: Stalemates and Breakthroughs – S5

May 26, 2026

BV

Abstract

Expeditions to settle the last frontiers of the cylinder continue. Wars rage across its landscapes. Some become indecisive meatgrinders, ash covering the soil, blood pooling and corpses mounting. In others, breakthroughs occur that tip the balance. Yet breakthroughs aren’t solely limited to the field of war. Settlements offer new opportunities, while tech advancement opens new, useful knowledge.

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CBR In-Game Screenshot of Welcome

1: Welcome

Greetings everyone, and welcome to the 17th episode of the Civ Battle Royale X Season 5. Your narrator for today is Boki, fresh off my last non-final exam of the semester and with just barely enough days to spare before finals season starts. And now I’m back exactly 10 episodes since I last narrated. As usual, I’m narrating blind, so the me that’s writing this scene has no clue what this episode shall bring, but I hope you enjoy. It’s Sunday as I’m writing this, and I’ll write scenes 1, 4, and 6 through 58 today, scenes 59 through 112 tomorrow, and the title, abstract and scenes 2,3 and 5 the day after that, alongside fixing whatever mistakes I made on the first two days. Anyway, I dawdled on here for too long, so let’s get going

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Map

2: Map

Our first OC of the week, as usual, is the usual map by Sonicfan. It (and to a lesser extent also Lacs’ CBRX Google Maps project) have been indispensable resources for my narration over the past two days.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of OC

3: OC

And here we have Orange’s Church of the Cylinder series, showing how Itelmen found its way back to success through a combination of hard effort and piggybacking off their powerful neighbour’s excellent religion.

Also, make sure to check out the XLasi ep 15 v ep 16 chart on the subreddit

4: A thank you to the Ko-Fi donors

As always, a very warm thank you to all the Ko-Fi donors. You make the CBRX possible. If you aren’t in this image and have some money to spare, do consider supporting the Civ Battle Royale on Ko-Fi. Hopefully, someday in the future, I might be able to join these fine folks.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of PRs

5: PRs

Tang is first in the Power Rankings now, while the largest rank delta the previous episode was Lanfang falling 5 places to 14th, but I wanted to shine a spotlight on the second largest rank delta, Mysore, who rose 4 places to re-enter the top 10.

Although they lost a city to Lanfang who then burnt it to ashes, and although the gains they made against them and Bangladesh in the Andaman and Nicobar Islands were quickly reversed, said brief gains, combined with their enemies’ flops on other war theaters last episode, all combined as a relative bright spot for their future prospects while serving as an indictment of Bangladesh and a call to put Lanfang’s powerhouse status into question. Combine that with them recently getting the techs necessary to sail the open ocean and sending settlers south, and there might be a shot of us seeing Mysorean rockets fly in a future episode yet. Will they be able to keep up the momentum though? We shall see.

And without further ado, into the action we go!

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Ashes in the Snow

6: Ashes in the Snow

We begin with a sight of the eastern front of the Bjarmi wars. The Estonian front hasn’t really moved much yet, while, over on the Vyatkan front, some confusion is going on. Koloperem’ is being attacked by a trio of triremes. I’m unsure if this will lead anywhere. Glasisvellir is below half-health, but the only nearby enemy unit is a similarly-healthy Vyatkan comp-bow. The Vyatkans have more forces for a decisive push on land, but they have yet to deal damage to Umpi, despite capturing the nearby citadel.

Off in the southeast, capturing the spirit of the age on the stage is Federico Fellini, OTL a famous and influential 20th century Italian film director and scriptwriter. However, since in the CBRX he was born too early to make films, he has to satisfy himself with writing and directing live-stage plays. I’m sure he’ll win similar fame in due time in this world as well.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Bloody Waves

7: Bloody Waves

In the ongoing Andaman War, Mysore appears to be desperately trying to recapture Rew and Sadhuim, but I’m not too positive about the results. They may have a slight edge over Bangladesh, and, with any luck might capture Rew, but Lanfang now has the strongest naval presence in the Andaman Sea and Bay of Bengal of the 3 civs. Sadhuim looks to stay safely under Lanfang control, and should Mysore flip Rew, it’d be easy pickings for Lanfang later. Off on the edges of the scene, we see Mysore trying but not quite managing to attack Khulna, Yunnan leaving a lot of smoke in Pegu’s remaining territory, and Lanfang failing to attack Geiju. Off-screen, Lanfang retook Gugang.ngadja

I am a bit skeptical of Lanfang’s choice of theater commander in the Andamans, though. Sure, Erik the Red is a great admiral, but he’s more an explorer and settler than he is a military man. OTL he was the man who led the Norse first settlement in southern Greenland, and around the same time that, albeit unknown to him, the north was being settled by a branch of the Inuit that would become the modern Kalallit or Greenlandic people.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Huh...

8: Huh...

While Pegu and Qara-Khitai end their irrelevant war, Mysore settles Chitradaruga on the Chagos islands, probably much to the chagrin of Seychelles, who has two settlers on this slide, both in deep ocean.  

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Oceanic settlements

9: Oceanic settlements

Not quite satisfied with just Fiji and (off-screen) a piece of Papua, both in Melanesia, Chono decides it’s time to dip their toes into Polynesia, by settling Guamblin on the island of Futuna. The tile expansion of Chono’s colony here also cockblocks that NSW settler from taking neighbouring Wallis. Meanwhile, Caral seems to have taken a page out of Rapa Nui’s book, occupying a bunch of islands with non-settler units so as to prevent other civs from settling them. Whether or not this opens up space for more Caral settles or ends up the same way as Rapa Nui remains to be seen. Also, what’s up with all those Ternate triremes?

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Mostly peace, though war looms

10: Mostly peace, though war looms

Here we see the peaceful northern reaches of Teotihuacan and Cebuano Baja, both developing nicely. Teo has a pretty decent army size, though I feel its land forces may be slightly too range-heavy. Off in Cujane, James Sinegal is looking to start attracting investors to open a big market, which he hopes will gain enough profits to turn into first a national and then international chain. OTL, he is the founder and CEO of Costco.

Off in the corners of the slide, we have some wars going. A group of Tlingit galleons is trying to assault Po’tol, but I’m not sure about their chances. Sure, all the nearby Pomo ships are the weaker caravels, but with the added support of land units, plus Po’tol’s own city defenses, it’s at best a tossup if Po’tol falls, and even if it does, those swordsmen and horsemen will make sure it flips back relatively quickly.

Meanwhile, the Ponca and Karankawa are suffering, with Anishinaabe invading the former and Susquehannock invading both. Xáda De has fallen to the Anishinaabe once more

Elsewhere, Guiyang falls to Tang off-screen

CBR In-Game Screenshot of “One could trim one's apparel through the mirror of bronze...

11: “One could trim one's apparel through the mirror of bronze...

Here, Guiyang falls to Tang on-screen this time. Nevertheless, with a nearly full-health Yunnanese galleon nearby, it’s still liable to flipping. I think Tang’s current attack on Qujing is both too small and too premature. Things aren’t looking too hot on land either. Chuxiong only got one Tang unit within its land borders, and Kunming, despite being attacked from multiple directions, remains a safe distance away from any Tang unit and completely undamaged. Not that it’d matter too much if it was damaged - it’s by far the best fortified city on slide. God that, UA is broken.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Painful stalemate

12: Painful stalemate

The two giants of western North America have each ground the other to a halt, neither able to advance far from the current border. Behe’pal is being approached by Pomo land units from multiple angles, but not even a lick of damage has been suffered. Tlingit attempts to advance south of Ka’tuuli or on Maka’hmo’s western approaches are similarly met by either road-blocking units, challenging geography, or apparent gaps that lure, surround and entrap over-enthusiastic single units, like that knight over there.

Observing the horrors of war from afar is the Christian Rosenkreuz, OTL the legendary and possibly allegorical founder of the Order of the Rose Cross, also said to be a reincarnation of Lazarus and Saint John.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of The side-riders

13: The side-riders

The Guaycuru celebrate their leader's capture of two Potiguara cities and a successful defense against Xavante by naming him Eso the Conqueror. That being said, the Guaycuru Republic is looking more sparse, at least on land. A well-coordinated assault by their neighbours could do a lot of damage. Chono might want to take advantage of Guaycuru’s relative emptiness before they fill back up. Ironically, some of the border cities in the Guaycuru mainland, including the capital, might even be under more threat than the isolated Guaycuru colonies further south, as the latter probably saw less or even no unit losses in Guaycuru’s recent wars, and thus may be better carpeted.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Rump empire

14: Rump empire

I’m really sad for Wassoulou over the state they ended up in. The only good thing about their downfall is that at least its beneficiaries are also civs I like. For what it's worth, the Wassoulou gave one hell of a fight against stronger opponents and promise to do so again in the future. They may well be doomed to lose the royale, likely to Aures, but goddam, they will not go gently into that good night. That being said, Kankan, which they gave to Aures in the peace deal hoping to cock-block Portugal, is being burned-down as we speak. Will it stop after pop drops to 2, or is Aures burning it all the way down? We shall see. Portugal, for its part, seems to be trying to get past Kankan’s borders to continue the war, but with two chips, one of which is a trireme and thus limited to coastal and/or Portuguese waters and therefore blocked by those stray Zazzau triremes, I don’t see them presenting a credible threat to Kérouane any time soon.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of The Plains War de-escalates

15: The Plains War de-escalates

Off-screen, an irrelevant war begins, as Kalmar DOWs Ma’in, while a semi-relevant war ends, as the Kipchaks make peace with Vyatka. The focus of this slide, however, is the ongoing Plains War. Specifically, the Anishinaabe leaving it, victorious. Peacing out with Ponca, they got to keep both their conquests, leaving the nigh inaccessible fortress of Wáin-Xude and the new capital of Húbdon either for other civs or for the future.

Now Susq has to fight Ponda and Karankawa alone, but I think they can handle it. Their capture of Coco last episode widened the front with Karankawa, which should allow more of Susq’s numerical and tech edge to shine there. The geography is slightly more challenging with Ponca, but if they capture Coapite and manage to stalemate Karankawa at the Brazos, they could have a relatively wide front to work with.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Central European mess

16: Central European mess

France burned Bucharest to the ground and neighbouring civs are already taking tiles. The nearest settler is Wallachian, but, in a cruel irony, the Pope is the only one who occupied enough space to found another city of his own. Problem is, the nearest settlers are all the way in Pontecorvo.

Meanwhile, France is launching an invasion into both Hansa and Scotland. It’s not going too well at the moment, but the war did basically just begin, so give it time.

In the sidebar Yunnan and Qara-Khitai end their irrelevant war.

Peshgaldaramesh informs us that Hansa is plotting against the Pope... Don’t you have more pressing issues? Like defending Wisbü?

CBR In-Game Screenshot of The war of disappointment

17: The war of disappointment

I’m honestly disappointed with both civs here. Mysore’s attack on Khulna failed completely. Their advance on Rajshahi seems to have barely begun. Meanwhile Bangladesh’s attack on Channapatna is going slower than it has any right to, even considering the mountainous geography. I would prefer Mysore to win, but I am very much a fan of both civs, and like... C’mon guys, you can do better than this...

CBR In-Game Screenshot of French Wrath

18: French Wrath

We get a better look of the Franco-Hansa-Scottish War. In particular, Inverness appears in much worse danger than I initially thought. That being said, there’s a large Scottish fleet off in the Channel and North Sea, so it is gonna turn into a flipfest. Furthermore, sharing a common enemy, Hansa and Scotland seem to have realized the benefits of close cooperation, and have open borders with eachother, seemingly promising to help each other’s defense and, hopefully, if everything turns out alright, offense against the Mad Jacobin.

Leading the French forces on the Hanseatic front is Gertrudis Bocanegra, who I already talked about in a previous season (I think season 4?). Regardless, for a brief refresher, OTL, she was a messenger and fighter in Mexico’s War of Independence against Spain, having joined the rebel forces after both her husband and son lost their lives fighting against the Spanish. She played an important role in the resistance in what is now the state of Michoacan, but would eventually be intercepted, captured and executed by the Spaniards.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of A tale of two cities

19: A tale of two cities

As expected, Rew has fallen to Mysore, but Lanfang retains the largest fleet in the area. That being said, their priorities appear a bit out of wack, as much of their fleet in the region is going against some caravels and galleases in bumfuck nowhere, while the rest are scattered around the region, only a handful left around Sadhuim. Forget attacking Rew, they’re allowing a Mysorean galleass to do a leeroy jenkins at Sadhuim. Depending on its luck, it may even work, however briefly.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Mountains and forests

20: Mountains and forests

Pegu makes some irrelevant peace deals with Scythia, Tang and Kalmar, which allows us a better look at the Yunnanese quagmire. Tang’s attack is going nowhere, despite the best efforts of Scipio Africanus, OTL the guy who basically won the Second Punic War for Rome.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Ghosts?

21: Ghosts?

The Ryukyuan gov’t-in-exile denounced Rouran for whatever reason, which allows us to take a look at most of the Khaganate. It’s got a pretty nice army going, with plenty of healthy and defendable cities.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Two-front war

22: Two-front war

Scythia and Pakistan declare war on Circassia, the Scythian knights raid the Circassian borderlands immediately. That being said, both sides are relatively sparse on this shot, with Scythia in particular having its forces spread thin.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Paint it blue

23: Paint it blue

The Seychellois, led by admiral Gaius Duilius (OTL a Roman politician and military leader during the First Punic War and the victor of the naval battle of Mylae) captured Inabba’ from Ma’in. That it might flip back to its original owners is not out of the question, but even if it does, it’s gonna be short-lived. The natural fortress that left Ma’in’s core cities protected from invaders for so long is finally being reduced.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Micronesia

24: Micronesia

Tang’s Micronesian colony, while still small, appears to be growing nicely, despite being surrounded by Caral, Japanese and Cebuano ships. Speaking of, Caral and Japan are at war with Ternate, but for now their attacks are contained near the borders.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of What?

25: What?

Uhh... Look, I’m not that surprised that this war happened, it probably would’ve sooner or later, but I am surprised by who the aggressor is here... No, your eyes aren’t deceiving you, Xaragua was the one to DOW Yanomami... not the other way around... And for the time being they actually seem to hold a slight edge here. That being said, if they’re trying to do a defeat-in-detail tactic, they’ve committed too small a holding force to the eastern part of the front...

Meanwhile, Ket and Yunnan peace off off-screen

CBR In-Game Screenshot of So it begins

26: So it begins

Both Wisbü and Inverness started suffering damage, however, while the French are bringing troops to apply pressure on the former, they have seemingly, mostly, pulled back from the latter. What’s up with that?

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Flip

27: Flip

Ma’in retakes Inabba’, but I think Seychelles has more than enough ships nearby to flip it right back. Even on land, Ma’in’s chances are getting worse, as more and more tech superior Seychellois land units are approaching. The approach may be narrow and split by mountains, but make no mistake, it’s only a matter of time before Inabba’ falls again and is secured.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of War on the Waters

28: War on the Waters

Lanfang by now has retaken the initiative from Bunuba. Bunuba’s small window of opportunity against Lanfang had come and it has now gone. Lanfang is even sending embarked units right into the midst of Bunuba’s territorial waters. It won’t achieve anything, but it certainly sends a message. That being said, Gurang.ngadja can still flip to that Bunuba fleet nearby.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of The burning prairie

29: The burning prairie

Susq is attacking Coapite, and while they haven’t dealt any damage yet, their position is better than in previous attempts on the city. That being said, I’d like to question the wisdom of burning Coco down. Sure, it might vent some unhappiness issues, but it’s a strategic position Susq will need for further inroads against the bottom-feeders of North America.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Uh-oh

30: Uh-oh

Remember what I said about Po’tol earlier. Yeah, scratch that, Tlingit is committed committed. That’s a whole bunch of ships just to capture one city. A large city, mind you, but one that from Tlingit’s strategic view would probably be little more than a far southern outpost. A strategically located one, as it’d allow more fronts against Pomo, including a potential strike against the capital, as well as further opening the Pacific and potentially threatening Cebuano Baja or even Teotihuacan

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Wonder time!

31: Wonder time!

Bunuba has built the Topkapi Palace in its capital, Junjuwa. Unfortunately, this wonder is next to useless in a Domination-only game like the CBRX - a miserable 1/10 rating in the stats sheet. Sure, it may boost culture, great scientist points, and happiness, and increase faith points from military buildings, but what good is that for Domination?

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Friends, I think Bjappening isn’t on the menu today

32: Friends, I think Bjappening isn’t on the menu today

JDT’s Nothing Ever Bjappens meme is holding strong once more, as not a single city changed owners since we’ve last been here. Vyatka has defeated Bjarmia’s attempts at Koloperem’ and is now attempting an amphibious horse attack on Glasisvellir with the aid of some ships, but their attack on Umpi completely collapsed. The Estonian-Bjarmi front between the White Sea and Scythia is near completely empty. Estonia has some ships in the White sea, but despite their tech edge, I can’t see them making a decisive breakthrough against Bjarmia’s larger numbers and land support

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Well, fuck me, I guess

33: Well, fuck me, I guess

Lanfang clears out most Mysorean ships in the region, prevents the Leeroy Jenkins-ing of Sadhuim, and also captures Rew for good measure.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Uniques

34: Uniques

As Ma’in and Yunnan end their irrelevant war, Qara Khitai shows off its UU, the Ordo Cavalryman. It’s a weaker knight replacement which starts with the Survivalism I promotion and gains more combat strength the further it is from its origin point.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Oh...

35: Oh...

Well, it seems I remembered wrong. Sumer has a panhandle which prevents Pakistan and Circassia from having a direct border, meaning Circassia’s war isn’t a two-front one for the time being. And it’ll remain so until either another civ joins or until Pakistan captures Sarepta. But the narrow border and hostile geography has been preventing a Pakistani attack on Sarepta for episodes now. I also don’t think Phoenicia is gonna be invading Circassia any time soon, as they appear to share open borders. Them sharing a common enemy in Pakistan certainly helps strengthen relations

CBR In-Game Screenshot of ...one could learn one's mistakes through the mirror of people...

36: ...one could learn one's mistakes through the mirror of people...

Tang builds the Amer Fort in Chang’an. A middling wonder for the CBRX, it provides additional great merchant points, boosts the combat strength of all units in friendly territory, and grants a free fort to the city it’s built in. 5/10

CBR In-Game Screenshot of [Pretends to be shocked]

37: [Pretends to be shocked]

Xaragua’s attempt to defeat Yanomami in detail backfired spectacularly as it is instead Yanomami who achieves a defeat in detail. While Xaragua has broken through the center, attacking Hawaroweteri and Yehiopateri, the eastern Yanomami fleet has completely broken through and is threatening their flank and rear. The western Yanomami fleet has also survived in decent numbers, and is threatening their flank off the coast of Jamaica. Prararaiteri has suffered a good bit of damage, but the Yanomami forces in the region have managed to secure the city and protect it for now. The Xaragua still have a comparable fleet nearby to attack again, but on the overall strategic view of things, this may just delay a Yanomami advance.

Meanwhile, Bangladesh and Ma’in make peace

CBR In-Game Screenshot of “Welcome to the land of Sumeria. I mean, Sumeru. Hittite Jumpscare” - Max0r

38: “Welcome to the land of Sumeria. I mean, Sumeru. Hittite Jumpscare” - Max0r

Sumer is the target of some irrelevant DOWs, namely Zazzau and Bactria. This gives us an excuse to look at the Empire of the Wive-Guy, and... not great, not horrible, I guess.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Irrelevant peaces and wars

39: Irrelevant peaces and wars

France makes peace with Yunnan and Pegu, the latter of which also peaces out with Mysore. Portugal also DOWs Yanomami, so we get to see how João’s realm is doing. Their navy is fine, but their army could work to be a bit larger. You know, just in case France gets any ideas. Portugal maybe could’ve settled Madeira... if not for the Umhaill horseman drunkenly prancing around there. Portugal got some ocean-going vessels, so they could hypothetically make their way over the Atlantic to help Xaragua’s war with Yanomami, but I doubt they’ll achieve much.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Ma’in in a bottle

40: Ma’in in a bottle

As expected, Inabba’ flips back to Seychelles, but Ma’in’s land forces collapsed before the Seychellois combined land-sea assault even faster than I expected. Inabba’ is now pretty securely Seychellois, and, even if it might kill that knight, I don’t like that isolated swordsman’s chances of survival. Janis Balodis (OTL a Latvian general and politician during the Latvian War of Independence and Interwar Period) can only hope the narrowness of the approach to Qarnawu will grind further Seychellois pushes to a halt. This is a bit of a double-edged sword though, as this narrowness is a result of Sumerian and Phoenician citadels - if the former and especially latter attacks, Ma’in is doomed.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Yunnanese quagmire

41: Yunnanese quagmire

Tang has kept and secured Guiyang, and is finally starting to make scratches on the walls of Chuxiong, but progress remains slow. Tang seems to have completely given up on Kunming. Probably a wise decision.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of The slumbering seals

42: The slumbering seals

Chono may still be sleeping, but they may be getting closer to waking up than ever. Sure, the DOW against Yanomami is irrelevant, due to a lack of borders and a few civs in the way, but it’s still against a fellow South American. Maybe a subtle sign they might move against one of their neighbours in the not-so-distant future?

CBR In-Game Screenshot of The bleeding taiga

43: The bleeding taiga

Pomo retakes Ka’tuuli, but Tlingit seems to have the forces to retake it. The attack on Behe’pal appears to have evaporated, however.

Also dam, everyone and their mother seems to be hating Yanomami, as Itelmen joins the hate train

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Punching above their weight

44: Punching above their weight

In a surprise upset, Kawankawa has captured Coco from Susquehannock. They were the original owners of the city before they gifted it to Ponca in a peace deal, so this is a long overdue reunification of their Plains territories too. It’s still too early to celebrate though - Susquehannock has troops on their way to both Coco and Coapite

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Wow!

45: Wow!

Peshgaldaramesh is letting us know Jacob Morenga is plotting against Kalonga Mazula. In other news, the sky is blue, grass is green, plants photosynthesize, seawater is salty, bears shit in forests, and Runami Yachiyo is gay

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Itelmen

46: Itelmen

Ethiopia DOWs Yanomami, Pakistan makes peace with Ethiopia, Pegu peaces out with Scotland, and Itelmen DOWs Bjarmia, the last of which is a good excuse to see them. They seem to enjoy open borders with Grukraine, and are at war with Rouran, the tiny sliver of damage Kyllush has and the smoke of a raided border tile being the only evidence that is even happening.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Facepalm

47: Facepalm

As Maravi DOWs Wassoulou, Susq captures Coco... and burns it to the ground. Now there’s empty space for Anishinaabe, Ponca, Karankawa and Susquehannock to expand their borders into. Which means a potential narrowing of Susq’s front against the North American rumps. Which doesn’t bode well for further progress in this war. That being said, much of the Karankawa army around Coapite has disappeared, and while the city remains undamaged, this may be Susq’s best shot to attack the city yet.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Well that sucks

48: Well that sucks

Fresh off their conquest of half of Ponca, Anishinaabe DOWs Pomo. Both sides appear unprepared, but Pomo is just still less prepared than Anishinaabe. Add to that the renewed Tlingit push from the northwest, and I don’t fancy Pomo’s chances of retaining their northeastern panhandle.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Nothing ever Bjappens

49: Nothing ever Bjappens

Bjarmia and Vyatka make peace, with no cities given over in the peace deal. Still, this is a small victory for Vyatka, as they did nab Koloperem’.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Something’s Bjappening?

50: Something’s Bjappening?

Ethiopia DOWs Bjarmia and France peaces out with Maravi.

Bjarmia, trying to pretend to be unbothered by the loss of Koloperem’, captures Linlithgow from Scotland to compensate. Scotland has sent some ships to reinforce the city, but they keep getting stuck in Kalmar traffic jams, and are now too late to defend the city. They could potentially try moving to retake it, but I’m not optimistic.

Off in the south, Estonia is trying. They’re very trying. But it seems like this land is just cursed to remain deadlocked.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of ...one could understand the rise and fall of empires through the mirror of history”

51: ...one could understand the rise and fall of empires through the mirror of history”

Tang finally manages to capture Chuxiong!... and has put it to the flame... *sigh* Well, let’s hope they stop before it’s completely down, otherwise this breakthrough would’ve been for nothing. Still, this is a breakthrough.

Elsewhere, Portugal and Qara Khitai DOW Bjarmia, while Sumer DOWs Wassoulou.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Pendulum.

52: Pendulum.

The Pendulum swings back in Bunuba’s favour as they retake Gurang.ngadja and clear out nearly all Lanfang ships south of Timor, Flores and Java. Nevertheless, Lanfang still has forces in the region that can retake the city.

Bunuba also denounces Cebu. Don’t tempt fate, Jandamarra. You may not like being at the receiving end of a protagonist’s attention.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of A line in the sand

53: A line in the sand

Kankan has been completely razed, removing the Aures buffer between the warring sides of Wassoulou and Portugal. Acting before their more powerful enemy can, Wassoulou decides to do a pre-emptive attack, sending forces across the desert towards Ad Medias. They haven’t met any resistance yet, but they also literally just crossed the border.

For their part, the Portuguese, impressed with João’s fighting spirit, both in victory and in defeat, give him the epithet the Soldier. Be it in defense of his people or in the expansion of his realm, he was always there alongside his men, women and others.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Naval strike

54: Naval strike

The Tlingit flotilla captures Po’tol, and Pomo looks ill-positioned to retake it currently. Most units nearby look geared for a defense of E’lem and Co’kadjal. Still, there is a longswordsman nearby, and the city is in the red. But the galleon occupying it is in the green, and more ships are nearby, so unless more Pomo units arrive, it may stay Tlingit’s for a while.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Siberia

55: Siberia

Pomo DOW’d Potiguara, but we now look at the Ket and the northern reaches of their Kipchak and Qara-Khitai neighbours. The Ket carpet is large and dense, but lower tech than I’d expect from someone who, in my mind, is one of the top dogs. It’s also much too range-heavy for my liking. On the other hand, from what we can see here, Qara-Khitai’s army composition has the opposite problem - too many melee, especially horse units. The small snippet of the Kipchak army we see here is too small to make an honest judgement, but if their overall army composition is comparable to what we see here, then they’re the most balanced of the bunch, even if they still have a slight preference for ranged. One area where Ket has the other two beat for sure, however, is city defense scores. Even their two weakest cities on the slide, Turukhansk and Verkhneimbatsk, have nearly twice the defense of the much larger Kara, and overshadow even Illiq, the best fortified of the Qara-Khitai cities on slide.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Susq core

56: Susq core

Susq DOWs Potiguara, so we take a look and... The Plains War sure has taken a toll on their land forces. They’re pretty sparse and thinly stretched. Their navy may be solid still, but Onondaga could do some damage on land if they attack now.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of OK?

57: OK?

The first relevant DOW of the Potiguara hate-train begins, as Yanomami, despite being the target of a similar hate-train and already engaged in a relevant war with Xaragua, attacks Potiguara. The approach is narrow, and Yanomami is now splitting its attention between two enemies, so this is a risky move. Things are helped somewhat by the fact that Xavante was at war with Potiguara since before the hate-trains’ve even begun, but this is a double-edged sword, as while it gives Potiguara another enemy to split its attention, it also allows Potiguara to attack Yanomami by marching through Xavante - and Xavante has little presence north of Marimbú - right next to the Potiguara-Yanomami border.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Caribbean adventures

58: Caribbean adventures

Rounding off the Sunday half of my narration, we pan back to Yanomami’s other relevant war. Xaragua’s attempts at Hawaroweteri and Yehiopateri have predictably failed, and they’re now at a disadvantage against Yanomami here. Nevertheless, the earlier backfiring of Xaragua’s initial attack was nowhere near as catastrophic as I expected and feared, and they have managed to consolidate around Jamaica and more or less halt the eastern attack. Leading their forces is a familiar yet unexpected face.

Unwilling to either risk her mainland colony against Max or betray her girlfriend, but still wanting to get some lust for adventure and warfare out of her system, Grace O’Malley left Umhaill temporarily and offered her services to Xaragua as a privateer. The Xaragua were in a very difficult position, but with her help, they were able to somewhat stabilize their otherwise bad situation.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Peace in Our Time

59: Peace in Our Time

We begin the Monday half of my narration with a shot of West Africa. Wallachia irrelevantly DOWs Bjarmia, while Wassoulou makes peace with Portugal, and celebrates by resettling Kankan, this time on the coast, and behind the safety of what I assume to be the Senegal river. Or is it the Gambia? IDK, Lacs will figure that out.

Off in the corner we see Thutmosis III, who OTL was a 15th century BCE Egyptian pharaoh of the 18th Dynasty, whose campaigns brought the New Kingdom of Egypt to its territorial zenith, crushing a Canaanite revolt at Megiddo, conquering Syria up to the Euphrates, campaigning in Nubia, and even invading the Mitannian heartland, and also founding what some consider the oldest military navy in history.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Sandwich

60: Sandwich

Pomo’s northeastern panhandle is being squished from both sides. Tlingit has reduced Ka’tuuli to 0 health, and the only reason they haven’t captured it yet is because their ranged units are blocking their melee ones. Classic. Elsewhere, the Anishinaabe are putting pressure on Kadi’u with a well-balanced mix of units, including their Ogichida UUs. Perhaps most frightening is the leader of the approaching army.

OTL, Subutai was a Mongol general in the late 12th and early-to-mid 13th century. He was a soldier of Temujin during his unification wars in the Mongolian plateau and rose through the ranks over the course of a decade. He participated in the vassalization of Xixia, the initial devastating invasion of the Jin, and the invasion of the Khwarezmian Empire. From there, he and Jebe were co-leaders of what is now called the Great Raid, the single greatest recon mission in history, destroying Khwarezmian, Eldiguzid, Georgian, Lezgin, Alan, Cuman-Kipchak, Rus, Volga Bulgar and other armies along the way, though likely at the cost of Jebe’s life. He subsequently participated in the conquest of Xixia and the Jin remnants, before joining Batu and others on campaigning in the Rus principalities and then Central Europe after that, co-ordinating the campaigns that culminated in the Polish defeat at Legnica and Hungarian one at Mohi, where he was personally present. The last military action of his career was a campaign into Song territory, during which he died of old age. Between Temujin’s acclamation as Genghis Khan and his own death, Subutai only ever suffered 2 defeats, both during the Great Raid. One against the Rus’ and Cumans mere days before the battle of Kalka where he ultimately dealt a catastrophic defeat on them, and another against a Volga Bulgar ambush on his journey back to Mongolia.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Holy War!

61: Holy War!

The three Shakti civs of Bangladesh, Pegu and Yunnan DOW Potiguara and Wassoulou. So let’s look at what they’re doing here. Pegu is just sitting there, its southern lands still smoldering. Bangladesh... eh? The angle isn’t good to see how most of their war with Mysore is going, but there are some pillaged tiles on both sides of the border near Channapatna. That being said, that Mysorean city is still undamaged, despite Bangladeshi numerical superiority. Yunnan, for its part, has retaken Chuxiong, but Tang still has a substantial army nearby to retake it. And while the defense of Kunming was a complete success, the countryside, especially in the north, suffered, the scars of war being as evident there as they are south of Dagon.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Slog

62: Slog

The Hanseatic-Scottish alliance has managed some successes against the French, seemingly. Wisbü has completely healed and Hanseatic troops have pushed their French counterparts all the way back to the border. Inverness is more damaged than we’ve last seen, but the French have seemingly pulled back from the city.

Meanwhile, Royal Robertson is making some of his outsider visionary art outside Paris, not too dissimilar from how he did OTL in the USA

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Pendular Enlightenment

63: Pendular Enlightenment

Lanfang enters the Enlightenment Era, and celebrates by swinging the pendulum back, retaking Gurang.ngaja. They haven’t advanced much beyond the city, however, despite the thinning of the Bunuba fleet there, so it seems this war is slowly settling into a stalemate. The simultaneous Bunuban, Mysorean, and Yunnanese wars seem to have also done damage to Lanfang numbers, as their army and navy, once pretty well carpeted, appear much sparser, more scattered, and more spread-out than they have been since the earliest episodes.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Meatgrinders

64: Meatgrinders

Speaking of sparse, scattered and spread-out forces, the other two belligerents of the Andaman War, Mysore and Bangladesh, don’t seem to be faring much better than Lanfang. Mysore’s navy is only a few ships large, and Bangladesh isn’t much better. Both have lost much of their land armies too. Mysore’s situation on the southern part of the land front deteriorated enough that their generals had to give up on any operations to assault or siege Khulna and have to satisfy themselves with merely razing its wider countryside.

Overseeing this front from near Calicut is Guo Kan, OTL an ethnically Chinese general of the Mongol Empire during the mid 13th century, who served faithfully in the Conquest of the final Jin remnants, Hulegu’s Middle Eastern campaign, the Toluid Civil War, and the invasion of Song China, particularly in the many engagements around the crucial fort-city of Xiangyang. He even briefly served as the first Mongol governor of Baghdad following the infamous sack of the city.

Also, Mysore DOWs Potiguara.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Guay-Pot 2, Electric Boogaloo

65: Guay-Pot 2, Electric Boogaloo

Guaycuru joins the Potiguara hate-train as well, in a second relevant DOW of this coalition this episode. They’re irrelevantly joined in this by Rouran and Scotland, the latter of which ends its irrelevant war with Wassoulou to do so. Immediately, Guaycuru ships engage their numerically and technologically weaker Potiguara counterparts off the coast of Jacu. Despite the relative paucity of Guaycuru land troops, the Potiguara have even less, so perhaps Guaycuru might actually get the city this time. Additionally, it seems that, since ending their war with each other, Guaycuru and Xavante opened their borders to each other, and a Xavante expedition is already gathering with the tiny northern Guaycuru division around Catu to strike at Jacu from the north. Things are boutta be ugly for the shrimp bois.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Not surprised, or even disappointed, but still sad

66: Not surprised, or even disappointed, but still sad

Pomo makes peace with Klingit, accepting the loss of Po’tol, Shanel and Ka’hwalau. Surprisingly, however, they managed to keep Ka’tuuli. This was a hard defeat for Pomo against their main rival, but at least it gives them breathing space and time to deal with the new Anishinaabeg threat. Their northeastern panhandle may survive yet.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Knocking down

67: Knocking down

Susq is finally making firm inroads against Karankawa, as they’ve brought Coapite to half-health. Things are not looking good for the blue rump of North America.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Not so shrimple now, huh

68: Not so shrimple now, huh

Potiguara’s stalemate with Xavante continues, with many pillaged tiles on both sides. Potiguara made a paltry advance into Yanomami’s sole bordering land tile, but with all the Xavante and Yanomami comp-bows, I don’t think that swordsman is long for this world. Yanomami is winning the northern front of the naval war, their techier ships cutting through the initial Potiguaran trireme line like a hot knife through butter that someone forgot to put back in the fridge. The Potiguara still have a large fleet in reserve near their capital, but it’s entirely trireme-based - it’s only a matter of when, not if, the Yanomami and Guaycuru grind it down.

I’m not fully sure who the Osei Tutu here is supposed to be OTL, since there are multiple people with that name, from the founder of the Ashanti Empire all the way up to the current heir of that same dynasty.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Kadi’ouch

69: Kadi’ouch

Subutai’s siege of Kadi’u is going well, the city is reduced to red health and the Anishinaabeg force around it is flanking around the city. Its fall may be imminent. The tactics that Pomo has relied upon to keep Tlingit at bay despite Pomo’s sparse numbers are failing completely against a much larger and much better concentrated Anishinaabeg force. We can also assume Anishinaabe has better logistics, but the most obvious advantage Anishinaabe has here that Tlingit didn’t is geography - Tlingit’s advance had to pass through tundra, over rivers and flanked by mountains and lakes, and a narrow approach courtesy of the borders in the region; while the Anishinaabe have a wide open front, with little more than plains as far as the eye can see. Sure, there’s a river on part of the southern approach and forests on the northern, but it’s nothing like what Tlingit had to deal with.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Forward again

70: Forward again

The French managed to push back into Hanseatic and Scottish territory, and in particular are now battering the walls of Inverness again. Nevertheless, I fail to see much of a difference in the city’s health since we last saw it.

Wanting to take a vacation from the responsibilities of admiraling the Babylonian sub, Gwaggaeto was allowed by a council made up of himself, Nebby, previous seasons’ (and mark’s) winners, and the Blue Cassette team to take a temporary leave to explore the cylinder personally. Instead, under this ruse, he decided to enlist in the army of a civ in this royale, and he chose to lead the defense of Inverness for the Scots. I guess he wanted to re-live some of his old glories from the previous season?

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Luo, wtf did you do now?

71: Luo, wtf did you do now?

Lanfang has consolidated its rule over the Andaman and Nicobar Islands, but something is amiss here, and not just the inconclusive Bangladeshi-Mysorean fighting to the north...

So... Rew’s borders remained the same, and the city model is still visible... but the city display thingy has disappeared? Lanfang, what in the everlasting shit did y’all do?

CBR In-Game Screenshot of You know what? Fuck you! *ungrinds your meat*

72: You know what? Fuck you! *ungrinds your meat*

Mysore peaces out with Rouran and, more relevantly, Bangladesh. This was a pretty pointless war, as Mysore managed to nab Sadhuim from Bangladesh only to lose it to Lanfang, leaving both civs worse for wear. Worse still for Bangladesh, they failed to take the isolated Mysorean city of Karwar in either the war or the peace treaty.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of *Stumbles drunk forward cutely*

73: *Stumbles drunk forward cutely*

NSW has entered the Enlightenment Era, a chilling prospect to any of their nearby rivals.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Mariana War

74: Mariana War

Japan is attacking Sampalu with a small fleet, but given Ternate has a similarly sized force in the area, Idk if they have what’s needed to capture the city. Additionally, both sides’ reinforcements are being blocked off by neutral powers - Japan’s by Itelmen and Ternate’s by Cebu.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Bjap

75: Bjap

Here we see a Kalmar-centric shot where nothing much is happening. Scotland is actually committing ships to retake Linlithgow from Bjarmia and they might actually take it, given the paucity of Bjarmian units nearby. Elsewhere, Estonia is attacking Vinuskógr... ineffectively.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of The tree

76: The tree

Here we take a look at Onondaga in most of its glory and... oh jeez that’s a lotta knights. You know what I said earlier about how Onondaga could rush into Susq and do some serious damage due to the sparseness of Susq’s land army? Yeah, I think that damage will likely mostly amount to a pillaged countryside and a reduced Susq army, because Onondaga’s army is basically all knights. Sure, the Onondaga army is numerous, but with nearly no ranged support, it’s gonna struggle taking cities. Sure, bum-rushes might net them a city or two, but at the cost of many a dead knight.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of - Emperor Taizong of Tang

77: - Emperor Taizong of Tang

Yunnan makes peace with NSW, the Kipchaks, and, most importantly, Tang. Surprisingly, the Tang diplomats didn’t swindle them into giving up a city that Tang didn’t already hold at the time of the treaty negotiation, with Yunnan only losing its small island city of Guiyang, and managing to retain the heavily damaged but still standing Chuxiong.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Et tu, Teo?

78: Et tu, Teo?

Peshaldaramesh lets us know Teotihuacan is plotting against Karankawa. They have gotten Cujane long ago, and Copano is certainly a thorn in their side, so despite the fact that they were allies a relatively short amount of time ago, I’m not so surprised. Coapite is edging closer to falling, and that may open the way to Carancahua for Susquehannock, so Teotihuacan may be feeling like the Karankawa’s role as a useful buffer-state to the northeast may be running its course soon. I can already see Archimedes’ comment for this scene.

Speaking of Kawankawa’s buffer status losing usefulness, Coapite is now in red health, with more Susq forces arriving and less Karankawan units present.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Dogs of War

79: Dogs of War

Anishinaabe manages to take Kadi’u with a knight. With a longswordsman nearby, the city in the deep red, and the knight at half-health, Pomo has a shot at retaking the city, but things are still looking bad for them even if they manage to do so.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Another unique!

80: Another unique!

We’re now in the Sahara, specifically at the tripoint of Hyksos, Ethiopia and Zazzau, where that last one is showing off its UU, the Yan Lifida. It is a knight replacement with a reduced penalty against cities, which generates Great General points from kills and gains extra XP near a Great General.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Hit

81: Hit

Here we see most of Luba just kind of existing here. They got lots of their UU and a relatively well balanced mix of troops. They’re also having some inconclusive fighting with Maravi. There’s also some stray Hyksos triremes stuck between them, Seychelles and Ethiopia, presumably trying and failing to find their way to join the anti-Maravi war. Sad, very sad.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Say cheese!

82: Say cheese!

Here we see the Papal States, with their new city, Ravenna. They’re pretty much boxed in with nowhere to go, but also with good enough geography and a dense enough army that they’ll probably stay here for a while still.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Even water can’t quench the hellfire of war

83: Even water can’t quench the hellfire of war

The Yanomami and Xaragua fleets appear to have bled each other dry in the eastern half of the Caribbean sea. Yet, in the western half and near the border in the Lesser Antilles, their navies rage against each other still. The pieces have fallen into place, and the true nature of this war finally reveals itself - a naval stalemate.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of No peace for the wicked

84: No peace for the wicked

Inverness has almost fully healed, despite the French just outside its very walls. The Hanseatic land army seems beaten, and the French have two tiles ahead of them to Wisbü, but these aren’t exactly that conducive to offensives - forests next to the Weser river. Hesse and the Palatinate burn.

Observing that from afar is Sarah Breedlove, OTL a late 19th and early 20th century American entrepreneur, philanthropist and activist, notable for her company’s line of cosmetics and hair care products for Black women.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of To the south

85: To the south

In the southern Indian ocean, in what I assume to be the islands of St. Paul and Amsterdam, we see two new cities by two civs, Seychelles’ Coëtivy and Mysore’s Bekala. Another Seychellois settler is heading even further south, set to found the second city in Antarctica. (Remember, Guaycuru already settled the first long ago)

Also, Lanfang and Mysore make peace, with no additional city exchanges.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Atlantic winds

86: Atlantic winds

Despite the potential threat of stray Xaragua or maybe even Portuguese ships happening upon it, the Yanomami manage to sneak a small force to settle and garrison Ashitoweteri in the Azores. In peacetime, it could grow to be a notable entrepot of trade between Afroeurasia and America, while in war is could, if properly garrisoned, be used as a protective outpost from any eastern and observatory outpost against any northern threat, or even, if properly reinforced, a jumping off point for invasions into Africa or Europe. Time will tell what fate has in mind for this island colony.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Mo(r)e presure

87: Mo(r)e presure

Japan has managed to reinforce its force attacking Sampalu, bringing the city to half health. However, at the same time, Ternate has also reinforced its defence force, and with this force consisting mostly of galleons while all attacking Japanese ships are triremes, things don’t look that promising for the Japanese. The Japanese do have the option of sending their own galleons from Kiyosu, but aren’t doing it for some reason.

Additionally, while Ternate’s neutral power traffic jams problem has massively reduced, Japan’s only increased, as Cebu has joined Itelmen, with a token Tang contingent, in making a mess out of the northern Marianas. Cebu, notably, also brought the free settler they got from their social policy tree. Will they use it somewhere north of Kiyosu?

Also, in case someone in the comments points out “wait, doesn’t Japan have a galleon near Sampalu?”. Nope. I initially thought so too, but no, that galleon is NSW’s actually. Just like that trireme off Jailolo.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of “Green land? I don’t think it is.”

88: “Green land? I don’t think it is.”

We take a look at the highly multiethnic Greenland. Onondaga has a strong military presence in the region, Karankawa is safe over here, despite not-even-half-hearted Onondagan attempts, and Scotland has just settled Dingwall.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Navigating

89: Navigating

Here we have a shot of the Maritimes, a domain split between Onondaga and Susquehannock. Despite the stuff I’ve been saying, it seems the two civs enjoy friendly relations, having had open borders for a good while now (yes I know it was shown in previous slides, I just didn’t really have a reason to point it out until now).

Highlighted here is Hanno, on the cylinder serving the Onondaga, OTL he was a 5th century BCE Phoenician explorer from Carthage who sailed down the west coast of Africa. We do not know exactly how far he made it, but he definitely reached at least modern-day Senegal, and some hypothesize he may have gone as far as modern Gabon.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of No approach?

90: No approach?

Seychelles has cleared out all but one of Ma’in’s military units, and Qarnawu even has a lick of damage. But this doesn’t solve the geographic problem of the narrow approach between mountains, the sea, and the Sumerian and Phoenician borders. Seychelles is probs gonna struggle making further headway here.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Flop

91: Flop

Pomo retakes Kadi’u from Anishinaabe, but Anishinaabe still has a lot of forces nearby. Still, both armies are kind of handicapping themselves, as they only have 1 or 2 melee units on the front, with ranged units blocking off further melee units from coming to the city. This is gonna be much more of a slogfest than it really ought to be. Dammit, Pontiac!

Leading the northern wing of the Anishinaabeg attack is Luis Alves de Lima e Silva, Duke of Caxias. As a youth, Luis Alves participated in the Brazilian War of Independence and the Cisplatine War. He then joined gov’t forces fighting such revolts like the Balaiada, the 1842 Liberal Revolts, and the Ragamuffin War. Finally, he led the Brazilian-led coalition forces in the Platine War, helping the Argentine Unitarians defeat their Federalist rivals after a series of bloody civil wars. Finally, he was the leader of Brazilian forces in the infamous Paraguayan War, and for his services there, he was ennobled as the Duke of Caxias. He later became a founding member of the Conservative Party and even briefly served as prime minister of the Empire of Brazil.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Catabatic winds

92: Catabatic winds

Seychelles did settle a city in Antarctica, but it wasn’t the settler we saw last time, but one of their compatriots, founding Anse aux Pins.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of How’d they get there

93: How’d they get there

But they were still beat to second city on Antarctica by, of all civs, Xaragua, who settled Miraguano near Guaycuru’s Antarctic colonies.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of More sett- JESUS CHRIST WHAT’S THAT

94: More sett- JESUS CHRIST WHAT’S THAT

Portugal settles Castelo Branco in the Cape Verde Isles, right on time for that catapult crew to get a heart attack from seeing the sheer size of the ships sailing just west of them.

The Umhaill UU, the Longa Fada, is a faster but weaker galleon replacement, which, upon killing an enemy unit, steals some of its xp and converts the rest into gold.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Stalling

95: Stalling

As you might’ve suspected from the fact we haven’t checked in since the beginning of it, the Scytho-Circassian War is going nowhere... I think... Look, it’s a mess, some Circassian tiles are pillaged, There’s a stalemate in the east, and Scythia made minimal inroads in the center. For what it’s worth, the Scythians have cleared Yedisan and Northern Taurida of Circassian units and entered Crimea, but they have yet to deal a lick of damage to Bygurqal, let alone any other Circassian city. That being said, Circassia isn’t exactly doing much better, with just one knight in Scythian territory and no damage to Dymkovo, let alone any other Scythian city.

Also Rouran DOWs Wassoulou but who gives a shit.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Exhaustion

96: Exhaustion

Bunuba flips Gurang.ngadja back, but every time we come here, both sides’ forces get more and more spent.

Sailing south from Cebuano lands to spread the Anito faith is Gobind Singh, OTL the 10th Sikh guru and the founder of the Khalsa, a special warrior vanguard within Sikh society to lead them militarily and politically after him. An accomplished political, religious and military leader all, leading the Sikhs during a turbulent era in their history, the reign of the Mughal padishah Aurangzeb. He appointed as his successor as guru the Granth Sahib, the holiest scripture of Sikhism - a book that holds this religious leadership position to this day.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of SIKE!

97: SIKE!

Caral has had ships in the area for a while, but I didn’t expect them to amount to much. Well, fool was I, as they materialized a substantial enough fleet to take Sampalu while Ternate was distracted with Japan. Ternate is now throwing the remnants of its forces in the region to retake Sampalu, and the city is in red health, but Caral has the local numerical superiority, and with the potential of the Japanese rejoining the combat, things don’t look good for them long-term.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Not hehe

98: Not hehe

Bjarmia and Scotland make peace, but more importantly, Zazzau DOWd Wassoulou, which had just recently settled Sanankoro. Immediately, the isolated Zazzau triremes out west assault Kankan, but I don’t really like their chances despite them dealing a good deal of damage, while a more substantial fleet of triremes is now off the coast of Kérouane. But, despite the fact that Wassoulou’s navy is even weaker at 2 triremes, due to the city defense and a sizable land force around the city, I don’t exactly like their chances of capturing the city.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Another war over

99: Another war over

Lanfang concedes defeat to Bunuba, making peace and allowing Jandamarra to keep Gurang.ngadja. The victory is a small one, and both cost more and lasted longer than would be satisfactory, but a dub’s a dub.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of [in Lich’s voice:] Fall

100: [in Lich’s voice:] Fall

Susq finally captures Coapite, and puts it to the flame. The city is not yet securely theirs, however, as there’s a swordsman nearby.

Meanwhile, Tlingit builds the Taj Mahal. It grants extra happiness and culture and starts a golden age for the civ that built it. Rated 4/10 on the stats sheet.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Take-back

101: Take-back

I don’t know who is stupider, Caral for leaving its border almost undefended, or Xavante for being emboldened enough by that fact to declare war and begin invading. Either way, Xavante quickly organizes an army to send south to retake Wedezé, so stupidly given away in a peace deal in their previous war. Let’s see how that works out for them.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Bulwark

102: Bulwark

Kankan has been successfully defended, and while Zazzau is slowly killing Wassoulou’s navy, they’ve also scattered their triremes across the southern coast, further reducing their effectiveness against Kérouane, despite this city now being effectively blockaded. Trying to remedy this issue, Amina secured open borders with fellow girlboss Dihya, but rn only one yan lifida and one swordsman are really taking advantage of that. The positioning of the Aures’ southern armies will make similar attempts to pass through similarly difficult.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Peace on the side, peaceful ocean center stage

103: Peace on the side, peaceful ocean center stage

Lanfang makes peace with Yunnan, ending their last remaining relevant war inconclusively. Ma’in makes an irrelevant peace with Qara-Khitai, while Pegu ends its irrelevant wars with fellow hated civs Potiguara and Wassoulou.

Here, we watch the Pacific, near the convergence of Polynesia, Melanesia and Micronesia. NSW settled Port Macquaire in what I think are the Santa Cruz Isles, while Bunuba settles Bungardi in what I think is Tuvalu. All the while, Caral ships are passing by, presumably on their way to join the Ternate War.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of The Seal Awakens

104: The Seal Awakens

Alert! Alert! This is not a drill! Chono has officially awoken! Chono, at the same time it declared an irrelevant war on Potiguara, declared a very relevant one on Caral. Conveniently, Caral has taken nearly all their naval military units to the other side of the Pacific, leaving only 2 frigates and a tiny land force to deal with the sleeping giant of South America and its small but vengeful Amazonian ally.

All of South America is now engaged in relevant wars with one or more of their neighbours. Despite the fact they’re also at an irrelevant war with each other, in this chain of relevant wars, Chono and Yanomami ironically find themselves on the same side. Caral - Potiguara - Xaragua VS Chono - Guaycuru - Xavante - Yanomami. Like North America a few episodes ago, South America is now locked in a war of truly continental scale. We’ll see how the balance of power shakes up.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of The Rescue Operation

105: The Rescue Operation

Karankawa retakes Coapite and saves it from razing for the time being. Susq still has units on the way, but it’ll take them some time to arrive. Especially with that Ponca trebuchet now providing ranged support.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Ashes of Flames

106: Ashes of Flames

Potiguara makes peace with Yunnan and, more relevantly, Xavante. This is technically a tie, but Potiguara is, iirc, at least on paper, the stronger civ of the two, so this is embarrassing nonetheless. Still, with Yanomami and Guaycuru both bearing down on them, better stop a useless slog. Still, this does shift the narrative I went with but two scenes ago. The wars now separate somewhat as it’s Potiguara - Xaragua VS Guaycuru - Yanomami, and then separately Chono - Xavante VS Caral. And in between all these relevant wars, Chono is also (currently irrelevantly) at war with both Yanomami and Potiguara. Someone should make a war chart for South America and the Caribbean in the days after the episode releases.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of I don’t think that’s a good idea

107: I don’t think that’s a good idea

Vyatka and Hansa DOW Wallachia. Vyatka’s DOW is irrelevant, but Hansa’s decision to open a second front with Wallachia while they’re already engaged in war with France appears to be almost as dubious as their decision to DOW France last episode. But then again, Wallachia’s former treasury issues (which may or may not be about to return???) have kept their science low and tech advancement negligible, making them lag nearly an age behind Hansa, so... as long as they don’t overextend themselves, Hansa may be fine, at least in terms of being able to keep a stalemate going.

We also see the Wallachian UU, the Lefegii, a longswordsman replacement, which gets a defense boost against ranged attacks and a heal boost when starting their turn on a pillaged Farm or Trading Post.

Elsewhere, Wassoulou and Yunnan make peace.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of City mapmode

108: City mapmode

Here we see the resources and yields of the Tlingit core, along with some details about their capital, Kaachxana Áak'w. It appears to be one turn away from building a... I’m not sure actually, but I think that might be a university?

Also wow, the minimap really enlarges a lot in this mapmode. It also gives a much better look at just how actually squished and proverbially fucked Grukraine is. They’re basically just waiting to be eaten by either Japan, Itelmen, Rouran, Tang, or whoever eats one or more of those 4 first.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Things might be Bjappening

109: Things might be Bjappening

The Bjarmian-Estonian front hasn’t moved much, but there are some hints of change on the horizon, as a substantial Bjarmian force is gathered near Myrkviskógur and Shabalinskoe and is advancing on Kohtla-Jarve. Nothing is Bjappening yet, but things might start Bjappening soon.

Off topic, but what’s up with all those Phoenician biremes just randomly sailing in Bjarmian and Circassian waters in all these scenes?

CBR In-Game Screenshot of Oh yeah, the other theater

110: Oh yeah, the other theater

Caral may be hunted by seals (and bananas) in South America, but they’re definitely the seal-hunters in the Pacific. Multiple ships are already blockading and attacking the unprotected Fijian city of Danggu, and more ships are approaching on the somewhat more defended Futunan city of Guamblin from the northeast. Also, is this our first sighting of the New Caledonian city of Guabtana? *checks Sonicfan’s map* It might be.

Also, Ma’in and Scotland make peace, as if that ever mattered.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of The wash

111: The wash

Susq retakes Coapite, and while not exactly secure, it does look more secure than last time they captured it. It helps that they aren’t razing the city this time. Now’s the time to send in those units dawdling on the other bank of the Mississippi and cleave their way to Texas.

CBR In-Game Screenshot of A wonderful exit

112: A wonderful exit

For our last scene this episode, we head to the city of Tlakwáan, where Tlingit has built the Sistine Chapel. This wonder provides an additional culture point, boosts culture generation in all cities, and grants extra Great Works of Art slots. Overall, a 6/10 wonder for the CBRX.

And that’s it for this week folks. I bid you a good time unit of your choosing, and I’ll see ya around.

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